


Here Comes the Moon Again.

by GinFourEight, HappyDagger, nanjcsy



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Play, Angst with a Happy Ending, Antisocial personaity disorder, BDSM, Dubious Consent, Enabling Behavior, F/M, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Multi, Original Character(s), Past Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Ramsay is his own warning, Secret Identity, Spanking, Stockholm Syndrome, Theon is just a bit of a lovable fuckup, Thramsay - Freeform, Trauma, possessive Ramsay is best Ramsay, struggling to make an abusive relationship into a healthier D/s relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-30
Updated: 2017-06-30
Packaged: 2018-04-28 20:59:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 29
Words: 87,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5105561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GinFourEight/pseuds/GinFourEight, https://archiveofourown.org/users/HappyDagger/pseuds/HappyDagger, https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanjcsy/pseuds/nanjcsy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Theon has escaped Stannis and returned to The Iron Islands. Lord Reaper in name only, he supports his sister's rule. He's spent months wandering his lonely tower when an unexpected visitor comes to Pyke.</p><p>Ramsay learns that Theon is in the grips of a completely different monster.</p><div class="center"></div>
            </blockquote>





	1. I'm Not Here

Theon pushed wavy hair away from his eyes and leaned on the cool stone bridge. It was damp and the salty wind was ceaseless. As the blood orange sun dropped to meet the ocean, the clouds around it turned pink. Theon rubbed his face and turned away. Sentry pushed into his legs and looked up at him with her serious brown almond eyes.

“What?” She huffed and looked toward horizon, but he didn’t want to see. She made a low growl. Solace lifted her white and grey head a moment then yawned and laid it down again.

Sentry’s black ears popped up into triangles and she turned to their left. “Asha,” he greeted flatly.

“Hard to surprise you anymore.”

“It might dangerous to…” he muttered to himself. He didn’t do well when startled. He’d put his dagger to some poor thrall’s throat when the boy grabbed his shoulder from behind. It could take hours to come back down. Asha would only smile and tell him it was a war sickness. She would smile at him without a drop of irony, as though his violent vigilance made her proud. She seemed to think he was more of a man now and that made him smile with all the irony he could bare. He was glad his sister was with him, still he wished her to leave him be most days. He loved to wander alone with his dogs beside him in the wind and under the sun.

She leaned against the wall so close to him that their elbows touched. That was alright. “I need you to talk to some of the men,” she announced pushing friendly Solace away with her boot.

“No.”

“It’s not really a question, Theon. Euron is sailing West. I doubt he will perish at the hands of the crumbling Lannisters or your mad Warden of the North…”

“He is not-” Theon shook his head and stood to leave her but she blocked his way with a sly smirk.

“The time is strike to drawing near. I need you to tell my men why our uncle needs to have an _accident_ , the kind of accident our father had on a bridge like this one, _right_ before Euron declared himself king." She touched his cheek but he pulled her wrist away.

" _Your_ father," he corrected gently. "He was never mine, nor did he want to be. I don't know your men." He hated looking at the Ironborn, he could only seem them skinned on crosses. It wouldn't leave his mind's eye. Their black sockets pierced and accused him, _how could you betray us_? Theon cleared his throat and chanted under his breath, shoving past his sister. 

"Theon I brought a gift.” She took a golden oyster from the satchel at her thigh.

He stopped and she swung around him grinning playfully. He furrowed his brow as a smile pulled at one corner of his mouth. "A compass?"

“Look,” she grinned and slid next to him, opening it. He pushed it away and walked on down the bridge to his tower. “Theon!” She ran to catch him up and pulled his arm. He smacked her hand away and Sentry emitted a low growl. He pulled his hand back and held it away from her. “Just look at yourself.” She held the pocket mirror to his face.

“I don’t want to see.”

“Look at your hair.”

Theon stole a glance and couldn’t stop the briefest smile. “Yes, it is nice. Thank you.”

“Theon,” she laughed pushing herself closer to him as he struggled not to back away. “Your little saltwife hasn’t dyed your hair in months. Look at your scalp.”

 _Saltwife what an embarrassing mess…_ “Wha-what my... what do you mean? Its all dark... it it really mine?"

“Look at your face! You’ve gained so much weight. You’re becoming yourself again.”

“Heh,” he forced a grin but he knew better.

“When I first saw you I didn’t recognize you.”

 _Oh, that’s where this is going._ “Asha, let us not tread in such dark waters _yet again_. I remember what you did for me and I always will.” Theon put his hands up biting back a bitter smile. “Bring good rum to my chambers and tell me what you need to say. Come!” He patted his leg and his dogs followed him away from her.

“I will! Good rum and good food for you!”

 

There was a knock. His heart started pounding but his head slogged around the room and seemed incapable of caring. Sentry stood and trotted to the door. His heart slowed and breathing came more easily. “WHAT?” He called out.

“Theon, I came to give thanks and say my farewell for now.”

Tears fogged his eyes for reasons he didn’t care to understand. “Give me your good news and greeting when you return. The rum was thanks enough.” He covered his eyes and decided to stumble around blowing out candles once she’d left his his threshold.

“You did well yesterday. You always do.”

 _Speak well? Pretend well? Yes, I should have been a fool or have I been?_ He snorted to himself and straightened his tunic, though she couldn’t see through the thick wooden door. Sitting up, he cleared his throat and acted again, “I am happy to stand behind my queen. I only wish I could take up a quiver and bow again to serve you better in your conquests.”

Asha laughed and he smiled. “Fuck off,” she called through the door, giving it a quick wrap. He heard her leave with her men and his hand starting shaking.

“Stop that. What? More rum?” He cordially offered his maimed friend. Solace laid her head on his lap and looked up at him with a soft wine. “Right, then bed.” He pet her thick fur to calm down.

 

When he woke, he was again in that state where he couldn’t remember where or who he was. He jumped up out of sheets and stumbled over his own boots, falling into the wall.

Solace slowly raised herself from the foot of his bed, turning her head in patient confusion at him. He sank back into bed and watched her shake her back legs, one then the other, and then circle around and land beside him with a humph. Each time he saw her sweet white face, he remembered he was out of the North, even if he remembered nothing else at all. He reached out to pet her with a sigh. “Sentry?”

He closed his eyes but soon sat up. "Sentry?" Theon looked around his chambers until he found her at the door looking like a black wolf with the fur down her back and at her shoulders spiked up and her lips curled high above her sharp teeth. “Sentry? What is it?”


	2. Forget Who I Was

"I hate seafood. It's like eating bugs off the ocean floor, it's disgusting. Bring me meat, would you? Don't any of you remember how to hunt?" Snarled Ramsay, knocking away the platter of shellfish. Skinner shrugged and said, "Unless you want to eat another rat or one of those disgusting birds, this is all we could get."

"Bring me a bird then, Skinner." The tall man snarled at the thought of those things, he hated those birds worse than any other kind he has ever seen. They squawked so loudly and they actually try to attack humans to steal food. The way Ramsay was narrowing his eyes, let Skinner know he was stuck with the chore.

Ramsay followed the cursing man out of the little shack they have found to hide in. He hated Pyke, he hated anything that wasn't the North. Yet, the North was lost to him now, maybe forever. So many to blame for that, none of it his fault. First his father, mostly his father, even though it was wrong to speak ill of the dead. He did that almost every night when he got drunk and his boys rolled their eyes but they listened and agreed.

He wouldn't be alive now if it were not for Damon, Skinner and Alyn. When Winterfell was suddenly attacked by Wildlings and some ragtag fire group all led by Jon Snow, they weren't prepared. Ramsay also wasn't prepared to see his wife wife on a horse, surrounded by women with spears. She watched with almost no expression as the battle raged. Ramsay fought Jon with his usual rage and skill but for once it was no match for whatever drove this man.

If it weren't for Alyn sending an arrow through Jon's sword arm at the right moment, Ramsay wouldn't have a head. Luckily, while Jon was distracted with the arrow embedded deep into his arm, Damon and Skinner managed to drag Ramsay away. The group of them fought their way out then hid in the woods. They ran for their lives out of the North.

Along the way they robbed and killed their victims, taking not just their possessions but their very identities. Switching them often for new ones. News was spread about how Lord Roose Bolton was burned at the stake by a red witch that has taken up residence with Jon Snow in Winterfell. That night Ramsay laughed extra loud with Skinner, drank more with Alyn then sobbed on Damon's chest until he passed out.

My father told me to get Theon Greyjoy, he told me I should let my creature play at being Theon and look what happened. My father told me to marry that cunt and look what happened. He told me to rule with less fist and more finesse like him and look what happened. Now his father is ashes and what is Ramsay?

No one with nothing but three men loyal but getting frustrated. They speak of the West, saying they could become mercenaries. Wars are happening over there and gold is flowing to the men hired to win them. Ramsay wasn't sure he wanted to live in sweltering heat while learning to eat snake or lizard. He isn't sure he ever wants to see a dragon. But what is left for them? So Ramsay was getting ready to agree when he heard the most wonderful and enraging thing.

They had been at a dock in Bravos, looking at passage on a boat going West, when Ramsay overheard a conversation. It was two sailors discussing the Greyjoys. Hearing that Balon was dead just made him smirk and he had only mild interest in hearing that Asha and Euron Greyjoy were battling. What caught his interest and made Ramsay freeze was hearing Theon's name. He has searched for his little traitorous pet but never found a trace of him.

Sansa was at Winterfell but no one heard about Reek or Theon Greyjoy being there. It has haunted him, how did Reek dare to kill his mistress and steal his bride? Why did Reek do it? Did Ramsay not have him as well trained as he thought? Had Sansa brainwashed him, or had Myranda scared him into it? Ramsay hated not knowing as much as he hated to think that his own little pet tricked him, betrayed him. It was in his dreams, his finally hunting down Reek.

It was only a rumor that the Lord that has been suddenly appearing at Asha's table was Theon Greyjoy. The description was possible but not definite until one of the men mentioned how the Lord hobbled and was lacking some fingers. Ramsay knew then and was filled with elation and rage. Reek wasn't dead, he was just overtaken by Theon!

How dare he be a prince, act the lord while Ramsay was starving, barely surviving like an animal? He owes me so much....I could have flayed him to death, I let him live and I protected him, cared for him. He owes me and I will have Reek back. So Ramsay had told the boys they were heading to Pyke and paying Lord Theon a visit. He has used Theon Greyjoy before for his advantage and will do so again.

After Skinner returned with a bird that he then charred almost beyond the point of eating, Ramsay headed towards the castle. His men were as silent as he was, not running into many along the way. All of Pyke was invested in this battle. Whether for Asha or Euron, anyone who can fight will and that left only the very young or too old to guard and care for things.

They have watched Theon walk with his dog along the beaches early before others awoke for the day. Ramsay was sure it was him and he found it amusing that he had a dog. Reek always did love the dogs, didn't he? He planned on making sure that Theon remembered who he really was and who the fuck he belonged to.

Leaving his men to keep the look out, Ramsay approached Theon's bedroom door. He heard the dog begin to bark on the other side and grinned. Out of a small sack that he was holding, Ramsay pulled out a fat rat. He allowed it to run under the door and then heard the dog go ballistic trying to catch and kill it. Waiting until he heard Theon make a noise of disgust at the dog, then open the door to allow the rat and dog to run out.

The second the door opened, Ramsay shoved hard to get inside the room. He slammed the door shut and smirked at the startled look on his pet's face. Or was this Theon? Yes, this was Theon but it was also Reek, he saw both in those eyes. "I have missed you so much, pet. We have an awful lot to talk about, don't we? Don't scream or you'll regret it. Look, I have brought something you'll remember." He held up the flaying knife and enjoyed the way Theon's face went white.

Reek would beg and grovel not to be hurt, Theon would fight or run. Ramsay waited to see what his infuriating yet enchanting dimwitted pet would do.


	3. Bandages

“Ah,” vomit dropped from Theon’s mouth as though it were blood and he had just been run through. He quickly staggered back wiping the acrid bile away and checked his hands; they quivered but no tremors ran through them. He felt his head and the back of his neck; they were dry. His vision was clear. Overall, he seemed to be horribly, tragically sober. “ _I knew you’d come_ ,” he whispered but he still shook his head in disbelief. He listened for his guards, yet he knew they were dead and dying.

His chest heaved as he slowly sank back, away from the door. His breath was the only thing breaking the piercing ringing in his ears. Somehow those few seconds seemed to be frozen, indifferent to time outside his chamber walls and he could see and hear his young thrall chasing him down the seashore.

“Your Grace!” Sentry stayed beside him and watched the boy hop around rocks and pound wet footprints into the gravelly beach. His brown hair turned red whenever he leapt into a sunbeam. Theon sighed and kept walking while Sentry ran to greet the little trespasser upon his solitude.

He listened to the roar of the waves dissipate then gather up again. A slow familiar rhythm, building and falling as if the ocean was calling him to come rest in the silent chambers of its heart. Theon’s cloak was yanked back then he was spun round with his hand at his young squire’s neck. He released the boy and stepped back. “Do not touch me, not ever.” He stared at the white foam rolling in on crashing waves. “I’ve killed better for less,” he warned mournfully. _They were younger than you. They didn’t do anything but live as we are now._ “I grow tired of telling you to leave me alone.”

“But the Princess-”

Theon scoffed. “Is she?”

“She wants to see you and no one could find you, and I am charged with making sure that you eat and I cannot get in trouble again, and I only wanted to know-”

“STOP!” Theon gritted his teeth and held his head. “ _Stop_ ,” he said more calmly, and knelt to look the boy in the eyes. “You were told to see if I had supped and someone bigger and meaner than you turned that into ‘see that he does’ as though you could help it?”

The young man’s balled up fists gave way to open hands. “Its unfair.”

“It is.”

“You’re a king and a monster slayer. They’re all afraid of the wolf you keep and your poisoned daggers but they’ll beat me if you don’t do as the princess would like. Why do they send me?!” He stomped the soft leather boot sagging around his ankle into wet, crumbling pebbles.

“I’m sorry I caused you so much trouble.”

The boys cheeks reddened and his eyes grew large. “No, please, I would never-”

“Don’t look at me like that!” Theon suddenly snapped. He didn’t mean to, he just couldn’t stand it. The boy who ran through sunshine was becoming a ghost before his weary eyes. “I’ll tell you some secrets if you’ll be brave.” The boy nodded and his misery was swept away in a blink by excitement. Theon started to head back to his tower with the boy and Sentry following. “What are you called?”

“Severin, if it pleases Your Grace.”

“Where are you from? Casterly Rock?” The boy shrugged, uncertain and embarrassed. “Well, the only poison I like is rum and wine.” The boy giggled and started hopping over rocks again, in and out of sunlight. “This is Sentry. I have another larger dog with soft, thick fur of white and grey. I call her Solace. They’re both Northern dogs but they’re no more wolf than you, or I, or those squawking birds flying… south… odd. Bring stew and bread to my chambers if you would like to see.” The boy took off running up the rotted stairs to the pier above, two at a time.

 

Severin hung by the fireplace, tense and still. “ _This one looks so mean,_ ” he whispered.

“See how she wags her tail and trots about? She likes you but she's very gentle." Theon smirked and poured more drink into his flask. "She won’t approach you while you’re afraid.”

“I am not!” The boy burst, red-faced again but then he grinned and scratched the back of his head. “Well… but how can you be sure they _aren’t_ wolves?”

“I have seen wild hungry wolves duck behind trees just ten paces ahead of me. I’ve heard them howling at night when I and a handful of wounded men were gathered around a small fire with not a star to lend us light in the clouded sky.”

“Truly, Your Grace?!”

“Here’s another secret. Will you keep it for me until I’m dining with the dead at the bottom of the sea?”

“I will! I swear it upon my life and my honor!”

Theon drank from his flask and lowered his voice to a whisper. “I am not your King nor any man’s, and I never slayed any monster.”

“You are though and you did!” The boy protested, making fists again. Sentry ah-wow-wowed at the child in warning though he failed to head it. “You are the King returned! Theon, son of Balon! You slayed the monster that skinned fleets of Ironborn and orphaned villages of children.”

“Stop. That’s a lie. Where did you hear that?”

“Their bodies will never be collected because no man will go back even now. Those who escaped went mad with what they saw, that he ripped men’s skins from them while they were living and ate their pulsing hearts.”

“ _Stop_ I said.”

“People say the Ironborn wouldn’t have touch the mainland for generations, but you felled him and reaped his bride, the Princess of Winterfell.”

“ _No_ , that’s all wrong. I didn’t-” Another ghost, more accusations, a reminder, bondage. Theon’s thoughts raced ahead of him. He clutched the hilt of the dagger at his hip and fought to keep his control and reason. “Get out.” Sentry paced as Solace lowered her ears and fluffy, curled tail.  He was afraid of himself and everything but he didn’t sound afraid, he sounded like his father when the overturned his table and bellowed, “ _GET OUT!_ RUN!”

He slammed the door after Severin fled and sunk behind it, shaking terribly. He felt outside himself as he repeated both words over and over to so many faces, blurring together. When her face appeared he remembered flying and fell back into his trembling, moaning body. Solace dug her head under his arm and licked him with small concerned whimpers. He hated scaring her and said both words again.

 

“I’m sorry,” Theon whispered hoarsely. Was it real? It seemed the most and least real moment of his life at once. He backed up to the window and leaned on its seat. “I knew you would come, heh heh,” he shuddered and jerked as the blade caught the fire’s light, but he couldn’t look away from Ramsay’s eyes. “My sister gave me more than a hundred good reasons why this was impossible but I _knew_.” He nodded, unable to stop and gripped the window seat with two white knuckles. “They said you were dead, mmm-” he bit his lip and rubbed a tear away with his shoulder, “I wouldn’t hear it.” _  
_

His anger was drowned before it had a chance to ignite by the fast waters that come after a thaw. Theon’s face swelled up yet he couldn’t cry. All the conversations he’d rehearsed in his haunted hours treading round these chambers poured from his moving mouth faster than he could stop them. “I couldn’t let her kill Sansa. I didn’t mean for her to die. I only _had_ to stop her but she fell. She fell and died and it was one instant then done and nothing would change it, and I am sorry, mm-” Theon covered his mouth and choked back a wail, hitting the glass behind him.

Then he remembered. “Listen, please, if you want to kill me, I understand, but if you don’t, ah,” he winced and curled in on himself but the words kept rushing past his teeth like white rapids, “I am far more valuable to you as this… thing I am now, playing the part I do. I’ve thought about this more hours than I’ve slept and I already have a longboat and small fleet of ships, and an island for you. I t-told my sister that’s all I wanted in exchange for…  and I-I… there’s a small castle it's stocked with food and provisions for you and two hundred of your men. The ships are manned if you’ll have the crews. I told her it was so I could be alone but she keeps me here. I can give you the fortune I inherited. I don’t want it. I have all this wealth and power, for now, and I can’t- I’m not… I only…” Tears filled his eyes again, though was detached from them. He was carried away and unreal, yet his feet were on the ground and his honesty was unbearable. “ _I didn’t know what do._ I haven’t, I don’t.”

Abruptly his river ran dry and things clarified. He found he’d been looking towards Ramsay not at him. Theon couldn’t stop his gaze from being pulled back to those eyes he had known would come seeking him. Ramsay looked more wild, leaner, more like himself. _Roose truly is dead, isn’t he?_ He swallowed and asked carefully, in the exact the way he had decided to months ago, “Would you like me to serve you in this way?”

 


	4. Coaxing And Luring

Ramsay wanted to kiss him, flay him, smash his face in, force him to his knees and hear him say his name. A slow grin curved across the chiseled, now with less meat, his bone structure made him look feral. His teeth looked sharp but his eyes they glowed. His face began to relax into a the look of someone who has already won but wishes to be benevolent.

Slowly, so slowly as if he was afraid of startling his prey into running, Ramsay approached the shivering mess. He gently pushed himself forward, wanting to intimidate, wanting to SEE Reek in there. "I do want everything you are offering me. And thank you for telling me why you were so unfaithful, so disloyal. I do not blame you for what happened to Myranda. She was a plaything and was trying to disfigure my lovely wife. Running away and taking my wife with you?" He let the knife play in the light as he crowded Theon against a wall. 

He had more bulk to him now, but not by much. "I like your hair. I like your lordling act. It is perfect. I taught you well, didn't I? I want one more thing, Theon." Ramsay said the name as if he were spitting out a piece of rotted food. He very gently slid the blade across that lovely flesh that Ramsay has painted such a tapestry on. Leaning in so close, that he could smell the salt, oil and soap Theon has cleansed himself with. "I suppose I could live with you smelling so good. I want one more thing. I want you." Anticipating a struggle, Ramsay put the blade against Theon's throat, a warning not to move. He leaned closer and gave a small fleeting kiss across his pet's lips.

Ramsay wanted to bite, shred, punish, keep his pet, force him to say his name, but he didn't. Instead, he smiled again, looking into Theon's eyes. "We are new now, aren't we? You can be mine. I can be yours. See how easy it will be for you? Look at how you shake, melt and I will take care of you better this time. Don't worry Reek. Master is here." Stroking a hand gently down Reek's cheek, he whispers, "I don't need the blade, do I? You remember everything, don't you? Even how much you would enjoy my attentions. How you grew to be able to shake with pleasure for me? It has been a very long time, Reek."

"Oh-" Theon's plan crashed and shattered around him. He was expecting rage and prepared for indifference. That was hardest possibility to play through; not the one where Ramsay set the island on fire, or peeled Asha's skin as he watched from a saltire, but the scenario where Ramsay took the money, laughed at his cowardice, then sailed on and forgot Theon because it had only ever been a game with a strategic pawn for Ramsay that some pathetic hated prince was sick enough to succumb to.  

But now Theon remembered things he had worked to barricade from his mind: steam and warm water, the soft sponge, the gentle touch and soothing voice. From that night he refused his sister and remained loyal, Ramsay had looked at him differently. When Master made him remove his clothes, he drank Reek in, surveying his work. He looked proud, moved and _desirous_. Now he remembered words whispered like poetry. How he melted at 'g _ood'_   and ' _mine_.' He hurt Reek less and less often, though he touched him more and kept him closer. 

Theon started when he found himself pressing into Ramsay's palm. 'Mm-" he clenched his jaw to keep the word in.  _He knows. He knows. He always knows! He sees that I am_ _weak, lost and incomplete. Put yourself together! You're being diverted onto a treacherous path!_

"I-" Theon's knees wobbled and he sank as the blade followed him, but he stopped himself at Ramsay's chest.  Two opposing torrents crashed in his head and leaked from his eyes. "I'm _not_ supposed to but... I-I have to- but," he bit his lip and grunted as his chest clenched curling him forward. He let his forehead bend onto Ramsay's shoulder- just for an moment, a mere instant, and he would quickly pull away again. "For tonight? Just _one_ night and tomorrow we can..." _You should hate him. You **do** hate him. "... _ work out an agreement?" Theon hadn't moved his head away but seemed to be sinking further in.  

 _Get up and fight!_ _Say the word; Solace is waitng. Don't be so fucking pathetic in your own lands in **your castle**! _ " _I don't know what to do,_ " he whispered hoarsely. Then so quietly, he may have only mouthed the words, " _I'm sorry."_

He opened his eyes and saw his black hair against Ramsay's tunic. He slammed against the wall where he was cornered and gasped, "No!"


	5. Drowning Under You

Ramsay’s eyes went from lustful and warm, to ice cold and without mercy. His voice was still soft, but there was a dangerous edge to it now. “No? Funny, a second ago it was yes, Master, anything you want. Which is it, Theon?”

“I…” his eyes slid over to where Solace lay on his bed. “Mmm…” he bit his lip and swallowed with difficulty. “Alright. I… we’ll do what you want… tonight and I'll give you whatever I can. Whatever else you need as I'm able. Just… I don't know. Please tell me what to do.”

With a snarl, because he wanted Reek, but he wanted to hurt Theon but it’s been so long, he began to force his tongue, his lips and his teeth upon his pet. Ramsay wants to tell Reek to give him everything, his blood, his tears, his fucking property and everything he has. Reek is his, everything he has belongs to Ramsay. “Tell you what to do, sweetheart? Don’t you know what I want from you right now?” He leaned back and smirked at his creature. “Show me how much you have missed me. I want it to be good for both of us, love. For tonight, then we shall see what comes next, sweet boy. I want you to get the fucking dog off your bed so we can use it. Can you do that for me, love?” Ramsay started to easily walk Theon over towards the bed slowly. He held onto Theon, afraid he would startle and run. “Good boy, I have missed you so much. Now tell the pup to get off the bed, maybe out of the room. Can you do that for me, sweetheart?”

Theon looked down at Solace. Her ears were down and her tail was wagging nervously as though she already knew what Ramsay was. It was just one word. It would be so easy to say. What was all that time and training for if he couldn’t do this now? But this wasn’t the violent rage or cold apathy he had planned for. Theon looked back at Ramsay, smiling patiently. A lie, he thought yet, he wanted it to be true. He could keep her safe and an option open. “Come, Solace.” He patted his leg and walked towards the door.

Theon had agonized over the wedding night, Moat Cailin, each time he had shaved Ramsay’s neck or held out his word. Why can’t I kill you? Theon had wondered if it was Reek who couldn’t and what that meant, but here he was crushed by the same impotence. It didn’t feel like an answer.

He opened the door and leaned into the hall, peering left then right. Damon was leaning against the wall across the hall and winked at Theon merrily. Skinner sat on a stool nearby and was sharpening his blades. Alyn whistled tunelessly down the hall, unseen but heard.  “My boys would never hurt your doggie, I swear it. You hear me, boys? Be nice to the pup, it is important to Theon.” Ramsay said helpfully, rubbing Theon’s back as he let the dog out into the hallway. “He’ll be fine and so will you. I am here now to take care of you, Theon. It is what you really need and want, isn’t it?”

His stomach dropped like it had when he lept from the wall. He could feel the same cold air. Solace looked back and whined. Her tail was tucked between her legs. Where was Sentry? “Go to the beach, Solace. Go on. GO.” He ground his teeth as she ran and hung in the doorway. A dead wind left his sails collapsed.

He couldn’t turn but dropped his head. “Yes. I need you here,” he mumbled to the floor. Maybe it was a lie, he couldn’t tell anymore, but it was easier to say than anything he’d forced past his lips for months. “Hush, I am right here for you.” Ramsay guided Theon towards the bed after shutting and locking the door with a grin to his boys.

The victory was sweet but having his pet’s body under him again was glorious. Ramsay tried so hard to remember to be gentle. To make sure his Reek was squirming and panting before he attempted to enter him. “Tell me how much you want me inside you, Theon.” It was so hard not to call him Reek. It was so hard to deny himself and wait for permission from his little pet.

Gentle, slow, easy, Ramsay reminded himself as he carefully stroked his pet until he was rock hard and whining. “See how much your body missed me, missed this? I did too, I need this, I missed this and you. I am never letting you leave me again, sweet boy. I love you and I know you love me. We need each other, you know that don’t you?” Ramsay slowly entered his pet, very carefully, while kissing him. He held Theon’s legs tight against his chest. Sinking deep but slow, he watched to make sure Theon was truly as hot as he was.

“Yes,” tears streamed silently from the corners of his eyes, into his ears. “I want you. I want you over me and inside me like this. I want you to make everything else go away.” He choked back a sob and hiccuped.  “I couldn’t be who they needed. Just take some of this power away. I can’t live with it.” He remembered his new scar and hoped it blended in with all the others. “I love you.” It’s terrible.

Ramsay could feel his pet just sink into the mattress, watched those sad blue eyes turn into his REEK, he wanted to say it, ached to. Instead he gave a bite to Theon’s shoulder, hard enough to almost draw blood. He listened to his pet hiss in pain, but grow harder at the dominance of it. Then he released the skin and licked it gently while Theon whimpered. “I love you too. I have marked you again. Only you and I will ever know it's there. We can keep it a secret, Theon. You can still be the Lord, as long as you remember to do as I say. No one has to know, sweetheart. But I need you, I need to be with you and you need me so much too. Tell me how good this feels, Theon? I want to hear your lovely begging for more...at least a single “please”!” Ramsay increased his thrusts, sensing his pet was ready to get rougher. He waited for Reek to burst forth with what Ramsay wanted to hear.

“Mmm,” Theon whined and turned his head against the mattress. He was dissolving, speeding to blissful nothing. He felt assured; this was good, things were right it would be fine. His nightmares faded. The dreams he woke up shaken and soiled from collapsed onto his reality. “Please,” he gasped, half mindless. “Please fuck me, mm-” he bit his lip and arched his back whining.  They call me their king and a monster slayer,  he thought ruefully and twisted in a panic to see the door, still shut and locked.

 

Severin was carrying laundry outside to hang when Sentry came running down the wing. He stopped at Severin, barked and circled, then barked again.

“What?” He looked around, but the castle was nearly empty and island so chaotic now. No one ever came to help. He threw his hands up and the wolf dog. “What? What do you want?”

 

Theon’s head collapsed in despair then rolled back on a wave. “Oh! Fuck!” His arms wrapped around Ramsay’s back. Ramsay never recoiled from his freakish touch. He pushed his face into Ramsay’s neck and his eyes rolled back. “Please…”

Ramsay wrapped his arms tightly around his slight pet, more flesh or not, he was still so light in his bigger arms. He found to his horror tears stung his eyes and he was glad that Reek was unable to see it. A savage pace now, he drove himself and Theon towards a higher peak. “Good boy, such a good boy for me. That’s it, let it happen, I want us to go together, baby.” He panted out as Ramsay felt his pet tense beneath him. Gritting his teeth, Ramsay gave a few hard thrusts in the exact way he remembered always sent his little Reek into a shuddering orgasm. “Scream for me, sweetheart.” He rasped out as he himself was on the edge.

Each ‘good boy’ rang like temple bells, vibrating through him. A peaceful, ecstatic, flashing death. An addiction with a deep hold anchored through his veins. It felt like an answer. He cried out, unable to stop now, “Master!” Ramsay needed that, oh gods, how he needed that and he cried as he snarled out, “My Reek!” He crashed into pleasure so intense it hurt. Ramsay didn’t even remember he was crying when he started to gently kiss his lovely pet’s face as he came down from the incredible feelings. “Oh, I have thought of this for so long, I have missed this. My sweet boy, my good boy.” Ramsay whispered and a tear fell from his cheek onto Theon’s face. Then another and now he sees it and tries to turn away fast. I am supposed to be faking this, Ramsay thought, so why was he fucking crying?


	6. Trying to Remember to Change Masks

"Theon!” His eyes shot open. “They’ve landed on our shores!”

“Who?”

“The Northern men! Come!” Asha held a lantern. Tears stained her dirty cheeks but she was resolute as ever ripping his blanket away. Now he heard the dull roar of grunts and cries and his stomach twisted with each sound. “They’re just drunk. They fight like this every-” but he heard a man scream and gurgle like a goat that had it’s throat slit.

They ran together through dark back passages where they had played so many ordinary days. Asha’s lantern engulfed them in a small globe of light which swept over the damp stone walls. She looked back at him, her baby brother she had called him once, and took his hand.

The passage opened by the back gate. They ran through smoke and blustering wind seeking The Great Kraken were Theon hoped to find their father, but Asha turned and screamed as a Northern sword wielded by a man in a fur cloak took their brother Maron’s head from his shoulders.

 

“Theon.”

He stood holding a broadsword of smokey steel, nearly as tall as he. 

Lord Stark extended his hand and said in his quiet way, “Bring me Ice.”

Scenes blurred, where was he? Was this the same sword that felled the brother he hardly remembered worshiping from a place of fear? Did it matter?

“My sword,” Ned’s calm face grew darker.

Theon’s stomach twisted as it had years ago when he was taken from his home and he forced a sly grin. “Yes, my lord.”

When the man’s gaping head rolled over he kicked it away and laughed as if that was just the remains of an enemy they shared, and not his future mocking him.

 

‘Reek’. His eyes fluttered open and he stretched through his fugue. Where was he? What was his name? He sat up and saw his room in the soft light of morning around him. He hand idly went to pet Solace but found hard flesh instead. Last night hit him in one powerful blow, knocking him from his bed to the cold,  smooth floor.

Ramsay was back home, he was in the bitter cold, snow hitting like tiny firebolts onto his face. He can almost smell Dreadfort, almost see Winterfell and then an image of Theon. Covered in blood, pus, shit, piss and writhing on the floor like a fucking disgusting bug to be stepped on. Ramsay had stepped on him, so hard that Theon screamed for mercy. He tried to stop himself without even knowing why he would. Then he wrenched from sleep by something he couldn’t identify. Instantly, he was on his feet, holding the blade he had hidden under the pillow. There was no danger, just Theon laying on the floor. “What happened? Did you fall out of the bed?” Ramsay had to keep himself from kicking Reek for scaring him like that. He couldn’t help his gruff voice, he was still half asleep. “Here, come back to bed, sweetheart. Look, it is early still. Let me hold you.”

Ramsay kissed his pet’s forehead as he gathered him into his arms then lay him on the bed as if he were a child. “Silly boy.” He pulled the covers over them both and started to rub Theon’s chest after he pulled the slighter figure against him. He could feel the trembling and it made him so warm inside. This felt good, to protect his little Reek, it felt good to have him back. To have his unsure, silly pet needing him. The other things can come slowly, gradually.

An image from his dream came back, of Theon so sick, so tortured and Ramsay squeezed Theon tightly. He repressed the urge to swear he will never hurt him like that again. But he won’t, Ramsay won’t do that. He will get his Reek back and discipline him as needed. He will play games to hurt him for fun, mild ones.

Yet he meant what he said. Who was he now? He wasn’t a Lord, he can’t ever use his name or power, it was all gone now. So he can change too. Theon was his, Reek was his and will always be loyal. Ramsay will make sure of that this time. Without taking away fingers or toes, without the extreme lengths he went to before. He wasn’t a monster and can prove it. For some reason, Ramsay was willing, to be honest by saying he loved Reek. He truly did and he knew Reek loved him back. Now they just had to convince Theon of it.

“Are you hungry, Theon? I will ask Damon to get a servant. We can have a private breakfast together. I want to feed you myself. Do you remember how much you loved that?”   

Theon whined pushed the back of his head up under Ramsay’s chin. He rubbed the side of his foot into the sheets. It made him dizzy to shrink this way; away from the world, into this shared thing he had become with a monster. His breathing became slower and deeper. His shaking muscles eased. It had been weeks he had sat to eat hot food.

His eyes closed. He nearly whispered please, then started in Ramsay’s arms but was held firmly. “Your men! I forgot- I did not think. I haven’t feed you. Here, hold a moment!” He struggled to pull away until he fell from Ramsay’s arms and rolled up to standing. Theon chattered on pacing. “I have chambers and a there are baths two flights below. This tower is all mine I can-” he stopped suddenly. Sour saliva filled his mouth and his stomach contracted. He ran to his balcony, shoving through his window paned doors. Holding the iron railing, he lurched all the rum from last night into the sea. He rarely woke this early and kept a flask under his pillow for when he did.

Solace’s winter fur stood out against the dark, rocky shore. She was laying before its steep drop into the cold violent ocean, probably waiting for him to come out when the sun was higher in the grey sky and take his daily walk with her, but where was Sentry? He wiped his mouth on his sleeve and slowly stood. He was trembling for a drink.

Theon slowly raised his spinning head, still gripping the damp iron with all the fingers he had left. There were no Northern fleets on the shore or at sea. Even the horizon was empty.

Jumping from from the past to where he leaned, quaking, Theon grabbed his head and hurried to the door, frantic to redress his negligence. “I don’t have many servants,” he explained, rushing past the bed. “I don’t like… to.” He unlocked and opened the door. “I can get us breakfast. I remember, I swear it- I mean, what you like. It will not take long, and your men-” he spun into the hall and stopped dead seeing Skinner leaning against the wall, cleaning his blade.

Ramsay watched Theon stumble about and then caught up with him in the hallway. Seeing the way his pet looked at Skinner, Ramsay smiled and put his arms around Theon from behind. His arms were firm and anchoring as he spoke gently in Theon’s ear. “It is alright, hush. Skinner won’t hurt you or stop you, it's your home. We are just a part of it now. Skinner, Damon and Alyn won’t treat you like they did before. Now they will protect you as they protect me. They are here to guide you not hurt you, I promise. And I don’t need you to fly about trying to feed us all. You are not a servant, I am not going to treat you that way. We have so much to discuss, Theon. But first, if you have no one to make and serve food, I will help you.”

“No,” he pushed back into Ramsay’s chest. “There’s a boy that helps me. He’ll go to the kitchen for us.” Theon swallowed. His thumb was twitching. “I can ring for him. You’re men won’t… Severin’s only a young lad.” He couldn’t bare the thought of being called a king, or worse, monster slayer in front of Ramsay.

Are you embarrassed to be seen with me in front of a servant, Theon?” Ramsay tried to sound amused but he was irritated by this and it bled into his voice.

“No! No, of course not my-” he winced unsure of what word to use. What if it was mistaken as a jape? Theon started to draw quicker, more shallow breaths. “Come with me then. I could show your men their rooms? You should see the lay of the tower…” he looked up and down the hall, willing his scrambling mind to work. “I have our sigils in my barracks several flights below. It’s only,” he shuddered at what felt like a grave insult, “if you wear them, all will see you and your men are under the guardianship of the…” he couldn’t say ‘king’, he’d laugh or scream first, “Seastone Chair.”

Theon looked down at his scarred body. He hadn’t even tied up his britches. “I… no, I can do this. I have to…” he worked through the building dread, Ramsay wasn’t angry yet.  He turned around and curled against Ramsay, the way they both used to like, to ensure his patience held.“Right, I have to, um, relieve myself but then I can dress and take you round.” He bit his lip and clasped his hands. “Is that alright?”

Ramsay felt his irritation melt away at the sight of  his foolish, meek boy trying to appease him. The feeling of his Reek wrapping around him submissively warmed him again and he smiled. “Of course, sweet pet. You need to calm yourself, I do understand. We aren’t insulted at all, are we Skinner?” Ramsay waited while Skinner looked over and said, “Nope.” “See, Theon? All is well. But you cannot run around with your breeches nearly falling down and with a full bladder. My silly boy, I adore you. Go now and pull yourself together. Take your time. Breathe and relax, I am not mad at you. I can see how hard you are trying, sweetling. I am so happy I found you, Theon. Please calm down and remember that you are my good boy. Isn’t that what you are? Tell me if you are my good boy?” Ramsay made sure that he spoke with a thick velvet tone, with just a hint of sharp blade beneath it. The way that always made Reek shiver and melt into him.

Theon teared up and cleared his throat, fighting to compose himself. “Am I? Truly?” He sound like a child in his own ears, like the tiny boy who begged Maron to notice he’d hit the center of the target on his first attempt. His knees quaked, and unable pretend for him, they sank to the ground. He pressed against Ramsay as he was brought down, hardly caring that his Boys were likely laughing at him.

Light footsteps came running up the stairwell, taking two at a time. Theon could hear a dog padding up the stairs alongside the boy. He looked up at Ramsay, as though he were lost in Ramsay’s home.

Severin stopped at the first bend down the hall. “Who the hell are you?” He demanded, staring up at Damon. He set down the silver tray of eggs, toast, and a kettle of tea he’d brought on the floor and drew the dagger Theon had gifted him. Sentry growled and raised the fur on her haunches, baring her fangs.

Theon pushed himself through Ramsay’s legs crawling up into running for his tunic. He had only been seen fully dressed except by Ramsay, since Ramsay had happened to him. He swiped his tunic off the floor and his flask from under his below. “Go on, Severin, just leave it there and take the dog with you,” he called out in the thick, full voice used on his islands. In the shuffle of lifting and dropping his tunic over his head, Theon managed to empty his flask and toss it away.

“Your Grace, your wolf doesn’t like these men!”

Theon gripped his head then tore his hand away. “Damn you, I told you she is not a fucking wolf and I told you not to come to chambers unless I called for you!” _Please, don’t say or do anything else. I am trying to fucking protect you_ , he screamed in his mind.

Theon appeared disheveled in his doorway and leaned into his hall. “Listen, boy,” but he saw Sentry posed to attack and went to her first. He knelt and spoke calmly. “No. Sentry, no. Guard _Severin"_. He tapped the boy’s shoulder and she turned from him to Theon. “Yes, guard Severin.” He tapped the boy again and brought the boy’s hand to her muzzle. “Severin. Severin. You see? Guard _Severin_.”

"I have no need of a guard, my king." The child’s indignant attitude clearly masked his fear.

Theon grinned at him. “Wait at the kitchen. I was drinking with my friends until late last night. They’re here to help us but you can’t tell a soul yet. You’re my special boy, you know that?” He whispered with a wink. “You’re the only thrall I trust. That’s why my halls are empty. Will you keep this secret for me?”

Severin’s eyes lit up. “Yes, Your Grace!” Then he stared up at Damon, his new status emboldening him. “I don’t like you,” he spit. Damon grinned down at the little boy and rumbled out, “Oh? That is just too fucking bad, little buddy. I am here to stay so you’d better get used to it. And aren’t you uppity for a slave? Isn’t that what a thrall is, a slave? So why don’t you get us all our breakfast, little thrall.” Ramsay cleared his throat and Damon leaned away from the boy, against the wall again. Theon managed to keep his voice level. “Severin, it is rude to say things like that to our guests. Go to the kitchens and get breakfast for all please. And see that they all have suitable rooms close by. Thank you. Go.” Bristling, Severin left with Sentry close at his heels.   

 

“That was impressive. Very firm yet polite. I like your Lord act, my good boy. Now, let me help you put yourself together, love. You are disheveled and sweating. And you forgot about your full bladder, silly. Oh foolish boy, good boy, what would you do without me?” Ramsay led Theon like a child to the chamber pot then helped him get washed and dressed, kissing him in the most sensitive of spots. “I love how you respond to me, sweet pet. I have missed it so badly, my sweet good boy. It is so hard to let go of you know that I found you again.”

Ramsay sighed as he finished making sure his pet was all ready for public viewing. “Now, I know you need to go speak with your thrall in the kitchen. Would you rather I accompany you or Damon? Or Skinner or Alyn? One of us must be with you, there is too much danger around for you to be alone. You may pick who you want to escort you, good boy.” He stroked Theon’s cheek, no longer gaunt and grey. It was sun seared and salt baked but still smooth somehow. He longed to see a lovely tear come down so he could lick it off. Shaking away his thoughts, Ramsay waited for Theon’s decision.


	7. Broken Shards Trying to Fit Together

Theon grabbed Ramsay’s wrist with both mangled hands. “Stay with me?” Ramsay pushed a wavy twist of hair out of Theon’s eyes. His mother used to do that. Theon didn’t remember her very much, except that she seemed always to be taking a rest in her chambers. But he could see her lick her thumb and use it to wipe a crumb from his mouth. She would smile patiently like this only her eyes didn’t dance like his. Theon furrowed his brow. “Did anyone ever do that for you?” He’d never thought to wonder before, yet now the question pressed down on him. “Who cared for you before me?”

Ramsay smiled but it was dark and bitter for a second. “No one. Only you have ever cared for me, really. Just you, my sweet boy.” Now his voice was playful again and Ramsay gave Theon a tiny shove forward. “Show me about, let me watch you play the host.”

 

“This is the study,” Theon explained pushing his back into the great swinging door. “Most of my countrymen don’t think very much of books but my uncle has a great library and he shared a good deal with me. I wanted to…” Theon set the sack of Kraken banners and sigils on a table and rubbed the back of his neck. He cleared his dry throat. “I had thought you may want a fleet and island for raiding… um, maybe… if you would want to stay… could I show you something?” He took a map from bottle, unrolled it and pinned it down. The sack shifted and fell on one side. His personal coat of arms slid halfway out, a kraken with six legs under a set of sharp fangs. How they admired his suffering where they once spit on his smiles.

“Here are the regions we easily raided in the old days, and they routes we still use. Nowhere else in the world can travel as we do, but I don’t think raiding is the way forward for the Iron Islands. Its an untenable strategy. But look at these poor cities full of wheat, here, wool, here, spices… but they’re locked in valleys or swamplands.” He finally came to his point. “I want to push my people into trading. We buy more rice than the lower Riverlands have ever sold at a lower price and sell it all over Westeros at a higher one. It would make us ruler on none but also free and an ally to all. Asha thinks its my … illness making me weak-minded.” He leaned towards Ramsay eyeing him hopefully. “What do you think? Would you...” he wrung his hands and turned away but peered back. “That is, if you wouldn’t want to leave or raid with you men. You could,” he shrugged as if apologizing and dismissing himself, “stay and help me?”

 

Ramsay took a moment to stare intently at the map before going to sit behind Theon’s desk. He beckoned Theon over and said, “I want to stay and help you. I want to help you turn your birthright into something truly powerful and useful. I want us to be rich and feared. Of course not in the Bolton sense of it, of course. That is all gone now, I must learn how to act more like a pirate, don’t I?”

He grinned playfully as he spoke, pulling Theon onto his lap. “I know I should let you go, but this chair is comfortable and it's hard for me not to touch you right now. Did you really think I would just plunder you and leave? I meant what I said, you are never leaving me again. Ever.” Theon winced and curled up against him. " I am taking care of you properly this time and you will never see the need to leave me. I am your ally, Theon.”  Part of Ramsay wanted to make it easier for him by calling him Reek. Saying it now would make him just give in completely. No, I am going to change. Soon enough, Theon will call himself that and surrender it all to Ramsay’s rule.

Until then let Theon wind himself up making these decisions then handing them to Ramsay anyway. The old part of Ramsay was leery of this, he knew the old Theon too well and was afraid he was just waiting to reemerge. That would force Ramsay to deal with his pet harshly, he doesn’t want that. This time he wanted to use different methods, he wants Reek to love and fear him with less stick and more carrot. It is the only way Ramsay can accept this love he has, it's the only way he can accept Theon’s love.

“I have not forgotten your birthright either.Theon promised, just above a whisper. “Even your Lord father knew you were destined to be a powerful man. It doesn't sound foolish to you, my thoughts? Are you-… do you like it then?” Theon let his head rest on Ramsay’s chest. Only for a moment, he told himself. knew it was a trick but it felt real and good, and he had learned not to take such moments for granted.

“Yes, I do like it. You actually do have a good mind for it too. You might be foolish and silly, but you are also very clever in your own way. While we have breakfast I want you to explain to me about what is going on with your sister and Euron. Then you can begin to tutor me in how to go about daily life here. I want to learn everything, Theon. This time you will be teaching me something. I hope I don’t have to hand over my flaying knife to you.” Ramsay joked, hugging Theon when he seemed to cringe. “I am only teasing you, sweetheart.”

“I wouldn’t do that to you,” he mumbled. Then he lowered his head and nuzzled Ramsay’s chest so it would seem like a promise and not an accusation. He didn’t want to sail too close to that maelstrom. “I’m sure breakfast is being served by now.” He bit  his chewed lip as a small shy smile warmed his tired face. “You have to move first though.” I'm too happy now and too scared of  the next step I take.

Ramsay lifted Theon up and set him on his feet. “Take me to our breakfast, little Lord of mine.”       

 

Theon opened his door and motioned for Ramsay to enter. “I had it sent here. Your men are eating in the dining hall.”  Treading to the balcony and back, Theon began to rub his hands as though he were warming them. “There’s someone I should tell you about so you aren’t surprised…” He stopped a moment, looking out at the sea. It was unusually calm. “My, uh, wife, or salt wife, rather. She claims the young boy she has is mine, and I did take her years ago, but she also thinks she has me convinced that I got her my seed again when I was too drunk to remember.  It’s a mutually beneficial arrangement. I look fertile, which was a condition of my… status, and have provided at least one heir and she and her children will be safely provided for. Heh,” Theon shrugged one shoulder and smiled wistfully, “they’re probably my cousins…. her children. That would be all for the better, then they would look like me. She’s afraid of me, that I’ll figure her out and beat her to death. Of course I wouldn’t, but I’m always cold with her and everyone… so she leaves me alone and seems fairly happy. I felt as though… I thought I should explain that. Oh!”

Theon grinned nervously, happy to change the subject. “He brought mulled wine for you. Its nice on a cool day.” Struggled to clear his tight throat. “I have a meeting this evening when the sun drops to that western star there. I thought I could introduce you to some men.” Theon poured himself wine and looked at Ramsay unsure whether to stand, walk away, or should he sit on at the foot of his bed? He looked at Ramsay’s feet then drank half his cup. I can walk and think. I’m not hungry.

Ramsay smirked, a familiar feeling on his face when faced with Reek’s uncertainty. “Come here, Theon. I told you that I wanted to feed you, remember?”

“Oh, please don’t wait for me. I didn’t feed you last night. I’m certain you’re starving. I ate until I thought my stomach would burst the night before; this horrible fish stew at a feast to sent off-”

“Sit on my lap and let me feed you...please?” It hurt to utter that word but Ramsay suddenly did feel desperate. What if Theon said no, what if he insisted on acting lordly and aloof? Should he flay him, beat him say the name? Worse was the terrible black wave of fear that swept over him, leaving him cold and empty. If Theon didn’t truly want Ramsay anymore, it was as if Ramsay didn’t exist. The pain of it made him speak sharper.

“You are too thin. I want to make sure you eat, not just drink from that silver fucking flask. Now come here and I do mean right the fuck now, Theon.” Ramsay gave the same intense dominating stare that always made his Reek move and do as he was told.  

Theon emitted a whining grunt. He coughed, looking at the ceiling and rubbed his neck again. It seemed he had found the end of his leash then. He looked around briefly and then found his feet. Unsure of what to say, he pursed his lips as the ends of his mouth pulled down and nodded.

Ramsay was holding his breath and did not release it until Theon came to him. Ramsay reached up and pulled the slight body onto his lap and felt a bit better. “Let's start with some toast. It should go down easy enough, then a sip of juice.”

Ramsay held the toast up for his pet to nibble on and cooed, “Good boy. I want to make you healthy. I plan on keeping you much better this time, see? I want you well fed, well kept, sweet boy. My boy, my good boy.”

Theon began to float away from the dread cold and heavy in his stomach. Each time Ramsay purred ‘good boy’ in his velvet voice, a warm blissful shiver ran through him. I can’t make him treat me like a man. The thought appeared somewhere as a weightless echo. He knows who I am.

“There, now have a sip of the juice.” He held the cup up to those lips he longs to bite into. After Theon took a sip of juice, Ramsay started to eat some of the food as well. “You pick now. Anything you want to eat, Theon.” Ramsay coaxed and brought a forkful of eggs up. He held it in front of Theon as if to offer it, then when his boy leaned close he ate it. “Oh, guess you’ll have to be quicker next time.” He had to play a game, even an innocent, no pain one. It has been too long and he can remember to tease gently.  

Theon smiled shyly. Maybe it was another dream but he wouldn’t take even that for granted.

 

 


	8. Shattering Truths Like Glass

Ramsay was appeased when Theon shared the breakfast and the silly game. After they ate, he decided to get more serious. “Alright, I meant what I said. Lord Theon, teach this humble student about your world. Everything from your culture to this war with Asha and Euron. We can walk and talk, show me your world, love. If it's your world, then it's mine now too, isn’t it?”

He absorbed every word, he listened intently and also planned frantically. Nodding when needing, asking pertinent questions, Ramsay barely noticed they had walked onto the beach.  In spite of Theon’s limp, it was Ramsay that was having trouble walking now. “Give me twenty feet of snow to dig through rather than this.” He muttered, nudging Theon. The small laugh from his pet covered and soothed Ramsay’s embarrassment.  

A minute later there was a huge “CAW” ripping through the air and a seagull, the dreaded enemy of Skinner came diving down. “Do you know Skinner hates those things? Actually, he fears them, I think.” He stopped them for a second to sit on a grassy knoll and pulled Theon closer.  

Theon smirked. Skinner had been the one to pull flesh from his toes and off his back. He pulled away Ramsay when he was being kind. Theon should hate them all, and Ramsay most, but he was never able to feel as he ought to. An act only takes you so far. Still, he had an inexplicable instinct to pull Ramsay back to him when Skinner came around.

“You will appreciate this story I think. When we first got here, we were quite hungry. And heartily sick of sea creatures for dinner. So we decided to have a small hunt. Except all we could find were these damned birds. Which were harder to catch than anything we encountered before. So Skinner came up with this idea to bait the birds. He started throwing meal to them and it worked. They all circled, then swept down to feast. Then more came and the next thing we knew, Skinner was running for his life, screaming like a little girl with a spanked bottom! They chased and pecked him. I don’t know why they did it, but it was quite funny. So whenever he ticks me off, I send him to hunt me a seagull.”

Theon laughed, hesitantly but in earnest. He cleared his throat and worked to steady his voice. “We should start back, I think. The men here will like you. Strength is valued above everything here. I can’t be as merciful as I would secretly wish. I feel like a sheep in a den of wolves trying to sell my bleating for growls…” he mused miserably. Skinner pulled him from his melancholy swearing at seagulls trying to hit him with pebbles he groped for along the shore. 

When they finished laughing, Ramsay sighed and stood up. “Come then, navigate me through the sand and the deadly seagulls, would you, Lord Theon?” He grabbed Theon’s hand, feeling the spaces in the gloves. Mine, my creation, Ramsay felt a small thrill but then he remembered the screams. _I took it too far, my father was right on that, I always do take things a bit too far. But that's not me now, look how careful I am being with my pet? Doesn’t this prove I have control now?_  He pulled Theon forward then took his arm and slung it over Theon’s shoulder. “Come on, pull me out of this fucking sand!”

Once out of the sand, Ramsay curled his arm more possessively around Theon and nuzzled his neck. “Thank you brave Lord for helping me.” He joked and led them forward towards the keep.

Theon’s shoulders curled in. When Ramsay called him a Lord it felt like both a joke and an indictment. The monster was boiling under Ramsay’s cordial facade. As soon as he was lulled into Ramsay’s trap, a word  or expression would whisper with cold breath, _It is only a trick. You are only a fool._

There was some sand in Theon’s hair and Ramsay began to ruffle it to get the sand out. He barely even registered that his boys were coming towards them. When Theon seemed to try and pull away, Ramsay thought his puppy was being frisky. “No, bad boy. Let me get the sand out, foolish pet. You’ll get sand in your eyes. Stop squirming like that, I mean it.”

Skinner snickered and nudged Alyn who had been talking to Damon. The largest simply grinned then looked away. That repulsive grinning skull with lizard eyes was silent in his mocking but it was very apparent.

“GET OFF OF ME!” Theon was able to shove Ramsay who stood there frozen. “Are you fucking mad?! Anyone could see us!” The first thing Theon noticed as he came to his senses was the deep, childlike, heartbreak which washed over Ramsay’s being. Yet, he could hardly feel pity before he was burning inside out with terror.

“I’m sorry.” Theon lowered his voice. “Please, I'm sorry. It's only, this is an island and a port. There could be ships and towers any with a spyglass. Our comfortable position here is more far perilous then navigating the sandy shore. That's what I've been trying to make you understand.”

Ramsay clenched his fists and his teeth, that moment of weakness, that moment of pain in front of them all. His own BOYS. It took every fibre of his being not to smash Theon’s face in. He knew that Theon had a good point, had a reason to shove him away. But he YELLED and SHOVED his MASTER and oh, Ramsay was filled with black fury.

“Do not ever shove me or yell at me again, ever.” He gritted out walking over to stand over Theon.

“I… I’m s-sorry,” Theon pleaded.

Hissing his words quietly into his face like a weapon. “Never ever act disrespectful to me in front of my boys, do you hear me? I don’t give a fuck what your reasons are, you do not do that to me. Would you have the last little bit of standing I have left tossed away? All I have left are my friends and you want to embarrass me, humiliate me in front of them?  I get your point, I understand it and I will be more careful in the future. But you have pushed me, Theon, don’t do it anymore. Do not make us both regret your behavior. I love you but I need my men too. And I won’t ever allow you to make a fool of me to them.”

Theon dropped his head. “I-I understand. I would never-”

“Get inside now. I want to talk with you in private, in your room.” He managed to say evenly. The men have started looking around at anything and everything but Ramsay and Theon. But Skinner still had that fucking smirk on his face and it caused him to snap. “Skinner, go hunt me some seagulls!” “Aww..he pisses you off by acting like a man and you punish me for it? Things really have fucking changed, haven't they?” Ramsay had his fist breaking Skinner’s nose before he even knew it. Only after Damon and Alyn took the bleeding, indignant Skinner away did Ramsay turn back to Theon.

Enraged now, he stormed towards his pet, rubbing the sore knuckles on his fist. “Look what you made me do! Did you see how Skinner fucking acted to me? Are you fucking happy now? Satisfied with yourself?” Ramsay tried to stop himself from yelling into Theon’s face, but it was all he could do to keep from hurting his pet.

“I’m sorry!” Theon fell to his knees and clasped his hands. He looked up with wide teary eyes, they way he had learned to. “Please forgive me,” he briefly scanned around them, “Master.”

He didn't think he would remember how to ride when Ramsay put him on a horse and sent him to get Moat Cailin. His mind was all sickness and writhing nerves, but his body remembered for him, as it did now without his consent.

 

As soon as Theon entered his chambers he went to his cabinet and pulled out a dark green bottle. The cork pulled out with a little pop. The bottle bobbed in his hand as downed the burning black tar rum. He coughed and fumbled putting the bottle back then began his pacing. He glanced towards his bed and for an instant almost thought he saw Solace. Somehow, it appeared, he could still be stunned by how much the his world may change overnight.

He muttered to himself under his breath as tread the worn path on his floorboards, “I have a meeting with my counsel, I have to tell them of Victorian’s death, I have to tell them of Euron’s gift to him, I-” he jumped at a noise in the hallway and leaned slightly towards his opaque door until he heard quick and heavy footsteps. He blinked and rolled his head back to stare at the ceiling. _This was a mistake. I can figure it out. There’s always a way out even if…_

 _He called me Master, that is big, it’s huge it should make up for shoving and yelling at me._ Ramsay reasoned as he headed up the stairs. Theon had melted into Reek fast, went to his knees, called him Master and those pleading huge tear filled eyes. It was enough for Ramsay to allow his pet to leave unhurt. He waited, went to make sure the Boys were sorted. Sneaking up, he listened to make sure they were not discussing him or Theon. Otherwise, he was prepared to flay some of their disloyal skin.  Damon and Alyn were teasing Skinner for his broken nose and his seagull terrors.

Good enough, so Ramsay had slowly made his way back to confront Theon. _He shoved me, yelled at me and felt fine doing that in front of his Boys_. It kept repeating in his head over and over. The other thing Ramsay couldn’t stop seeing was Reek’s face when he called him Master. Just before he did, those large teary eyes looked around to make sure no one else could hear before saying Master.

Yes of course, they must be discreet. He understands it logically but his pet was thinking as Theon the whole time. So was Reek an act? A remembered thing and Theon is really who he is dealing with? Or is Theon the act and Reek is trying to balance both personalities? Is Theon still really his, or has he learned enough of Ramsay to be as sneaky? _I will remain calm and understanding, I won’t hurt him. We will talk and I will get my Reek back no matter what. I will be calm and reasonable, firm and loving. Hell, to prove to myself that I have changed, I can go further. I will apologize to Theon for not listening better. Promise to be more aware of his position on the island._

Ramsay entered the room with the best of intentions, to see Theon tilting his damned drink into his gullet. He saw red and black flowers of rage blooming in his eyes as he flew across the room. At the last second he was able to change his fist to a backhand. “Stop with the fucking drinking!” He yanked Theon upright then slapped his face with an open palm. “Are you trying to be that arrogant drunk little shit who fucked up in the first place?”

“No,” Warm tears fell on his numb face. _It was his sweat, it had to be_ , he remembered and touched his forehead as though it could still be there. “I need it! To do this, to talk with a steady voice above a whisper, to move without cringing and shaking. I need my dogs with me.” He crawled back with a sob. “Please, _please_ , just tell me what you really want. I can't play two opposing games, mm- … if you break me now you'll kill us both. Can't you see that?”

Ramsay threw the drink across the room and then yanked on his own hair in an effort to gain control. To not just hurt this whining Theon, to remember it was also his Reek. A scared, tired, confused version of his pet. “Stop asking me what I really want! I have told you over and over what I want. You should know by now! I want you, my pet, my REEK!” And there, just like that the name dropped between them like a heavyweight finally thrown off their shoulders. “I want you to be my loving pet and play the Lord too. I want to have you with me forever. I want to share with you all this power you are just drinking away! And you got rid of your fucking dogs, not me!”

“Please, _please_ , Master, don't trick me again. Not like _this_. I'm sorry I ran-”

Ramsay screamed in rage. “ _Do you even hear me?_ What trick? I am not tricking you! I love you, I am not leaving you! You are not leaving me! You ARE my Reek, you will always be! I am trying so hard to change for you and you pull this shit on me!” He wasn’t really aware that he was shaking Theon hard enough for his teeth to chatter. “Stop repeating that! I am not tricking you!” The pet kept repeating himself and Ramsay kept shaking. So much for his intentions, he thought with disgust.

These torrents of confusion were unbearable. He had been pulled under them before. _I'm not going to kill you. You are good and loyal. Do you love me, Reek? Leave him be, Skinner. Just who the fuck did that to your face? Look, Reek, I brought you a gift._

 _Aren’t you… can I die now, Master?_ He'd asked slumped into a corner at Ramsay’s chambers in Winterfell. _I'm so tired and you have use left for me._ Ramsay's face had turned black like this, seething. That night he swore never to ask for death again but why? _Come here, let me feed you._ Why? _Don't try to lift that, puppy, you'll break your back, you fucking idiot._ Why? _You’re mine forever._ Why?

Why didn't he take the money or his revenge? “Why… you really don't hate me?”

That stopped him. He stared directly into his stupid pet’s eyes. “I don’t hate you. I have never hated you, Reek. The first Theon I met, I pitied him, I did hate his fucking attitude, I hated how I had to wait for him to dry out before really working on him. I hated almost everything about him. But I didn’t hate him really, because if I did...I wouldn’t have taken the time to make you, Reek. I would have skinned him alive and said to hell with it. I would have ripped out his tongue the first time it truly annoyed me. No, I don’t hate you. But I hate watching you slide back into the old Theon when I am trying so hard not to slide into the old Ramsay.” 


	9. If We Pretend Very Hard...

“The old Theon?” He rubbed his dizzy head. “Could… could I show you something? Please,” he glanced at the open door and listened, but heard no dog trotting on the stone, “Master?” He smiled like a nervous child asking for bit of cake. Ramsay grimaced at the way Theon had to check about before he called him Master. He remained calm, he said he understood and so he will learn to.

“Yes, fine, what do you want to show me?” Ramsay was tired, he was desperate for them to move away from the fighting. Then he said it again, unable not to, but softly. “Reek...when no one is around, I call you Reek and you call me Master. It’s reasonable, right?” Ramsay cleared his throat and spoke more gruffly. “So show me something, Reek.”

Theon froze on the floor. His eyes went blank a moment until he startled himself, as if waking from a dream. “I… once I feel my tower is secure… and the dogs...” he slowly climbed to knees and nervously chewed the inside of his smile and slowly reached out to Ramsay. He didn’t recoil from Theon’s naked hand but grabbed it and pulled him closer. Theon’s eyes brightened. “I think it will make you happy, Master.”

 

Theon lit the two mirror-backed candles hanging by the entry then went about the room lighting others. Ramsay didn’t seem impressed. “It’s, that is, it was my father’s study. Well, uh, I … you said you didn’t like the old Theon.” For some reason he thought Ramsay would understand, but he realized he was speaking in scattered fragments. “Here,” Theon drew breath through his tight chest and walked to the fireplace. He held his lantern to illuminate a great painting of a gloomy family. “That’s me. See? My, uh, my sister showed me.” He didn’t want to look again so he turned away, facing Ramsay instead. “Asha said I was a shy, weak, child with eyes too big for my head. She said I followed Maron, my brother, like a lost puppy he couldn’t kick away, heh. That’s the word she used. I don’t know if it was on purpose. He’s gone but she likes to kick me still,” he tried to laugh, rubbing his neck.

He couldn’t read Ramsay’s expression and felt uneasy. “Asha tried to get me to take my father’s chambers but I like my mother’s tower better. I found a… there’s a journal of hers there.” He wrapped his arms around his chest and walked to the window. “She worried about me a lot, reading it. I didn’t see her when I first came back. I was afraid to. She wanted me to be soft be myself but the world is cruel and hates weakness so how could I?” Theon slid Balon’s coat of arms away across his dusty table and leaned against it. “It isn’t simply that I didn’t want to die by Lord Stark’s sword, I didn’t want to die unwanted, that’s all.”He smiled and snuck a glance at Ramsay, “I know I did everything wrong.”

Ramsay stared up at the picture that was a smaller version of Reek. It wasn’t Theon that was the original after all. This somehow made things easier, so did the sloped shoulders of his sad pet. He felt a bit more right and the tight pain in his chest eased a little. “I like only one person in that picture. I love that person and there is nothing wrong with him. He is mine,  just were temporarily given to the wrong family….families.”

Wrapping himself around the back of his sad puppy, feeling the spine poke into his chest.  “I will come with you to visit your mother next time and I will help you show her the real you. The softer one that only she and the Boys will ever know exists. I will not undermine your public image again. But in private, Lord Theon can go away a little, right? No more guzzling cheap poison till you puke, no being disrespectful in front of the Boys. Agreed?”

“I…”Theon felt the wall he’d constructed crumbling one brick at a time, “but, I need…”

Nuzzling into that pale neck, his lips caressed the many scarred bites and Ramsay gently bit. It was a fit into the largest most prominent scar but so gentle unlike the many other times he has done it. However, just like when Ramsay would bite hard, Reek reacted with the same melting shiver and whimper. “I won’t get drunk or speak out of turn again, Master.”

If he reached around right now, he knew his boy would be rock hard. Ramsay knew he wouldn’t be able to solve every problem with his pet this way, but fucking was safer than fighting. And making Reek give in to him kept Theon from peeking out.

“Good boy...you try so hard for me. You always have tried so hard for everyone, but I am the only one who ever appreciated it, loved you for it.” He spoke directly into Theon’s ear, purring.

Theon whined and pressed his temple to Ramsay’s lips, rolling his own against each other. “It feels like the end of the world and us alone in our empty castle.”

He rubbed his face and tried inch away, but he was pinned between Ramsay and his father's desk. He felt the eyes on the wall were upon them. His breath hitched and raced as he tried to slide away. “I should tell you about,” he tried to picture anything but the hard cock pushing against his ass, “um, the kingsmoot-” he tried to swallow. His face was flushed.

Ramsay gave a thick chuckle then whispered, “You can tell me all about it. Later. First, I want you, right here, fuck your father. Let him roll in his grave while he sees how well his son is loved by a monster.” Ramsay started to caress Reek, he started to slowly bend his pet over, then stopped. Breathing heavy, he panted, “It is your choice, though. Should we run tiptoeing like naughty boys to your room, or can we just forget your father’s wishes and needs. What about your own wishes and needs, Theon?”

“Ugh,” he gasped. He felt himself dissolving again. There was a bottle of clear oil his father had used on his blades at the edge of the desk which Theon pulled near.

Ramsay snatched it with a grin. Theon’s calf squeezed back and forth against Ramsay's leg, pulling at him. Ramsay pushed Reek’s tunic up onto his back and ripped down his britches. Yanking the bottle open, Ramsay slicked his fingers. Slowly, up and down, Ramsay warmed Reek into arching his back and opening for his Master’s warm touch. Reek rubbed his face against the smooth desk, gasping softly and whining so prettily. Circles swirled tighter, pressing in. Reek’s head rose and fell again. “Please…”

Ramsay obliged with a hungry smile and pushed in to seek out a smooth spot in tight crinkled flesh. Reek cried out when he massaged it. Rising and falling breathy moans as his pet writhed under him crystallized some shattered part of Ramsay.

Reek gave a short cry when Ramsay took his fingers back to free his hard dripping  cock. He roughly took Reek’s wrists in one hand.

“Such a good boy for me...so responsive, don't’ ever feel guilty for that, Reek. For us, this is love, just this way.” Ramsay kept his voice low and velvet, he pinned Reek’s thin wrists in his large grip. His cock nudged into that tight hot space and he moaned. “Hush pet. Good boy, you love this, don’t you? You love Master fucking you this way, don’t you?”

“Yes,” he exhaled, spinning and light, “Yes, Master.”

Ramsay began to thrust in rough but paced strokes the way that always made his pet breathless and squirming. “Do you want more, sweet boy? My good boy? I love to hear you beg for it. You love to beg for it, nothing wrong with that is there? How can it be wrong when it makes us feel so good, Reek?”

“Please, _please_ , fuck me, Master. Take me, please. Fuck! I’m yours! _Please_!”

Ramsay was careful to make sure that Reek was ready before he started to get faster, harsher. His bites, his grip got more savage but still careful to not harm just to inflame. Coaxing his pet with every word, every move, Ramsay waited until his pet was ready to explode before allowing himself to fully feel the pleasure edging closer. “I want you to scream for me, my love. Let how good it feels, let who you are blow right through this fucking room, Reek.”

“Fuck!” Reek’s spine rolled up from his tailbone to the base of his skull. “I love you, Master…” he gasped, going blank in mindless ecstasy.

When his pet began to shudder in orgasm, Ramsay let go of his reigns more. He slammed into his pet then wrapped his arms tight around Reek. Together they cried out against the cold forbidding room in released pleasure.

Afterwards, Ramsay collapsed into the heavy chair thick with dust and pulled his pet into his lap. “I want this room for us. And the first thing that goes out of here is that fucking picture. It will give me something to do for those times when I must let Damon or another be with you. Is that alright with you, love?” It still hurt a bit to ask Reek for permission to do something. Sham or not, charm or reality, Ramsay wasn’t sure anymore and it scared him. Was he really pretending to change or really changing? Yes, he was changed, he would know if he was acting. He can’t fool himself..can he?

Yes, I can. I fooled myself into thinking I would be Warden of the North. I conned myself into thinking Reek would never run or betray me. I was easily convinced that I had that simpering bitch under control. Worst of all, I had fooled myself into believing that my father really was infallible. I believed he was nearly God and that he would always be there. And then the worst most horrible thing happened and Ramsay instantly felt stripped raw. He had spoken without meaning to at all. He had said all that  aloud. There was small consolation that he hadn’t also blurted out his fear of whether or not he was changing. But still, he froze, his tongue deadened and even though his pet was on his lap, Ramsay felt suddenly terribly small. With near terror, he waited to hear what Reek would say. What Theon would say. Shutting his eyes, Ramsay held his breath and waited for the verbal strike that surely would come.

Theon looked up at Ramsay reflecting his heartbreak. “I'm sorry I ruined everything for you. I had to. It may yet be for the best. I  think,” he touched Ramsay's human face; only flesh like his own, “ _this_ is worth anything.”

Snorting and shoving Theon off his lap to cover his relief, Ramsay stood and stretched. “Okay, we have delayed enough, tell me about this Godsmoot or whatever it is.” He teased, grabbing Reek and fixing his clothing and hair.

Reek watched Ramsay straighten his tunic and wipe dust off the side of his face. Ramsay smirked at him and he slammed into his chest. Wrapping his arms around Ramsay’s waist, he buried his face.

 

 


	10. Monsters And Krakens

"I, um, I take a dagger, my bow and quiver with me, to make an impression… but also in case.” He held the dagger up for Ramsay to see and let him watch where Theon slipped it. “I wouldn’t want you to think…” he scratched the back of his head. It’s not for you? It didn’t seem necessary to explain. He looked at the mirror one last time before opening the door. “I plan to tell them you, Damon, and the other men are here to aid me that we fought alongside one another. Well...” he looked at himself, a maimed Lord Reaper of a torn groups of islands and saw Ramsay over his shoulder. It was too strange and he wanted a drink.

“The point of this meeting is to disclose to the few people left who have some idea who Euron even really is that we will not and cannot back him, that Asha has already set out against him. He had been absent so long people thought he was dead. They don’t even know what he looks like other than a pale, charming, sinister man, lean and handsome, with black hair, light eyes or… eye, rather. He has an eyepatch. Like that, actually.” Theon pointed with some disdain to a red eyepatch kept by his fireplace. “A ‘gift’. I think he knew his black eye always frightened me. He is sadistic, ruthless, manipulative…” he looked at Ramsay staring at him through the mirror and felt uncomfortable.

Theon turned to lean on his vanity. “I hate doing this.” He tried to very casually slip by Ramsay and pull the mornings wine off from the table. “I have to think, we have to agree on a story about who you are and why you’re here so I can introduce you as my man.” Ramsay arched an eyebrow as he poured a glass. “What?”

 

Severin came bounding up the stairs. He skidded to a stop seeing the towering men in furs and leather blocking his way again. He huffed and tried to hurry past. “Pardon me,” he grumbled. “I have an extremely important letter for the Lord Reaper.” Instantly the boys all began to grin and Skinner huffed back, “Oh ho, well then little boy, we don’t want to keep you from your very important errand.” Yet they moved towards him, crowding the insolent pest. They began to shove him back and forth a bit. Not hurting, more trying to humiliate as the struggling Severin could not get past them. “I am sorry, boy, are we still in your way? Maybe next time you should try asking us politely, you little fucker.” Suggested Alyn sweetly as he shoved the boy into Damon who then grabbed the slight shoulders tightly. “Try asking politely if you want to get past us.”

Severin looked up at the broad men crowding him. “I am not a little boy. The Maester says I just haven’t grown yet. Maybe one day I’ll be bigger than you.” He aimed his finger high at Damon’s face but blushed at his absurd and flustered defense. “I am the personal servant to your King. Let me pass.”

There was a crash and grunt from Theon’s chambers down the hall. Someone was shouting, it didn’t sound like the Lord of the Iron Islands. Sentry growled and lowered her head. The towering men looked at one another as though sharing a great joke. “This is urgent!” He waved a sealed letter in the air.

Skinner sank back from the other two and knocked on Ramsay’s door.

“Then it will be delivered to your Lord.” Alyn snatched it from his hand and knocked him into Damon.

Ramsay came storming out and received the letter from Alyn’s hand. He glanced at Severin as though he were a dead rat they had neglected to throw out the window. “I’ll help the boy find his way,” Damon offered and swooped him up under one arm.

Ramsay broke the seal as the boy’s cry of surprise echoed down the hall.

 

_Baby brother,_

 

_I hear our uncle has sailed down the Honeywine River for Old Town. It hardly matters now. There marches from the North a mad band of savages adorned in white wearing white paint on their faces. I cannot fathom their numbers._

_We were blown north into Flint’s Cliffs by a terrible storm. The surviving crew scattered without returning. I need you to come bring me home. I’ll return to the bay in three days time and wait at the easternmost pier  from early dawn._

_I so hope to board your SeaBitch but if you cannot find me by nightfall, assume me dead and flee. Do not set foot on the mainland. You will see._

 

_Your Sister,_

_Asha_

 

Ramsay scanned the letter four more times in rapid succession before putting it into his pocket. “Do not mention this letter to Theon, I will deal with it personally.  Our Lord Reaper has to be ready soon for his important meeting. I want all of you cleaned and in some nice Ironborn clothing as you will accompany our Lord into his meeting. You will act the part of support to this great Lord, you make sure that he is treated with courtesy and most of all, you will keep him safe. I trust no one but us here and I swear that no one will ever harm a hair on Reek’s head but me. Tell Damon the same instructions. In fact, he can have the boy assist you all in finding appropriate attire. Then come back here and bring the serving boy with you. He needs to help Theon prepare as part of their little traditions so that our servant doesn’t get suspicious.  Understood?”

Both nodded then Skinner slyly muttered, “Course Ramsay...but weren’t you going with Theon to this meeting? Or has he changed his mind?” Narrowing his eyes, staring hard at Skinner, Ramsay didn’t have the time right now he needed to put his arrogant friend back in place.

“Oh, I will be showing a little bit late. I have decided against Theon’s original idea on introducing me and decided to do my own. Something with a little more flair to it. Ever fancy being on a dangerous pirate crew before?” Ramsay grinned at the confused Boys and grinned.

Damon made sure his grip was tight enough that the squirming, kicking boy could not get away. When he went down the stairs, he ran so it made his victim bounce and rattle about. “Look at that, what service for you! Don’t get used to such nice fancy treatment from us all the time, little boy. We are important and busy men that cannot always take the time to give you personal escorts and deliver your messages for you.” Damon taunted in a booming voice as he carried the lad all the way out the door into a small spongy patch full of damp weeds and wildflowers. He dropped him into the spongy mess and grinned down widely.

“Even a soft landing. You are the most spoiled servant I have ever met. Smallest and most arrogant too. You remind me of someone when they were younger. Anyways, there are some small changes. You will hand all further notes or news for your Lord to one of us. We are your Lord’s loyal men and are here to protect him, help care for him. Good talk and you have a good day, boy. Why don’t you eat some real meat instead of all this seafood? It clearly doesn’t offer anything to help grow height or bulk.“

Sneering, Damon turned to walk away chuckling. He had needed the distraction, it was getting way too intense since they got here. Ramsay and Reek were locked in a pitiful game, causing Skinner to try and stir up trouble So it was with near joy that he heard the boy mutter from behind him. Spinning around fast, Damon went over and put a large foot on the boy’s chest, pinning him. “Want to repeat that?” Damon stood as menacingly as he could, putting more pressure onto the boy’s chest.

Severin looked up with indignation and some fear, spitting out, “I said that I won’t obey any of your orders. I only serve Lord Reaper and will deliver his personal correspondence to him unless he tells me different.” Damon gave a fearsome smile and leaned down. His foot ground painfully into the squirming boy’s chest. “Listen to me very carefully, Severin.” Damon sneered his name the way he has seen Ramsay sneer the name Theon. “Do you remember that man upstairs that looked at you as if he could flay you alive? That man is Theon’s most trusted confidant and the only man here who will have as much power as your Lord. He makes decisions with Lord Reaper’s full approval. So from now on you are going to do as I tell you or I will tell HIM. Do you know what will happen then? One of two things. If MY Lord feels merciful, I will visit you when you least expect it with my favorite whip. I assure you, I am very talented with it. If he is not feeling merciful then he will possibly arrange a very fatal accident for you. Do you hear me, boy? I am not lying, I am telling you the truth. So learn to do as you are told, bitch. Or we will have bloodier words next time.” Damon took his foot off the nearly blue boy and walked away, whistling. He felt so much better and was ready to face his troublesome companions again.   

Theon checked his face one more time. There was a scrape on his his cheekbone by his left eye. With a sigh he left his chambers. Skinner and Alyn were waiting in his hall. Skinner snorted. “Nice bow, Reek. Are you going to gift it to someone with all their fingers?”

“We’ll guard you. Ramsay is coming,” Alyn muttered. “He gave us these squid things to wear. What else?”

Theon furrowed his brow and filled his lungs to feel bigger. “You’re both fine as you are. They dislike uniforms and fancy clothing. I think Ramsay may ask you to let him speak on your behalves if he hasn’t already.”

Alyn looked at Skinner who made a sweeping gesture down the hall as if making a cordial invitation.

 

In a small thatch roofed cabin the secret meeting went on miserably enough. “Euron is King, my young prince,” bitter old Erik barked, “and he named me Lord Steward of the Iron Islands in his absence.”

Theon sat back unmoved. “And married my sister to you without her consent. Where is your wife?” Erik hacked some of his indignity into his handkerchief. “The Kingsmoot was meaningless; I was falsely assumed dead.”

“We shall see what the Lord Reaper has to say.”

“My father, your King, died shortly before Euron charted course for the Islands. It was blamed on a great storm, fitting in name, but his body washed ashore and it became clear my father was murdered just before Silence came into harbour. Aeron has yet to be seen since his last meeting with Euron, and now my uncle Victarion has been-”

“He was poisoned by that mad wizard he keeps. Your father was a drunk who fell from a bridge whilst stumbling around in high winds, and Aeron has no want or need of men. He has not for years now,” Dunstan spat.

Theon appeared made of stone. “Until and unless Euron returns to make his claim, I will remain Lord Reaper as rightful heir of the Iron Islands.” Theon surveyed the room. “Who among you cannot abide that?” he asked coldly. Damon had entered the room without him hearing and now towered over Theon's seat with an eager grin. Skinner and Alyn rose to stand beside him. “Speak now so we may settle the thing.” Theon reached back for his quiver but a hand took his instead.

Ramsay smiled down at him, but his eyes were burning. “That’s a bold proposition, my Lord. Are you still so eager to die with a weapon in hand?”

Theon’s fleeting glance quickly covered the small room. “No. No, of course not.”

“So your reign is disputed? How many Ironborn wait for Euron’s return?” Ramsay leaned on the back of Theon’s seat and idly played with his hair. “Hmm? What’s your guess, fat old man? You seem to have the taste of his come lingering on your tongue.”

His boys laughed and Theon sat, wide-eyed and shrinking.

“How dare- who the fuck are you?” Thormor demanded, striking the table.

“Most of my people stand behind me,” Theon pleaded quietly.

“They think he’s a hero,” Alyn grumbled with a curl of his lips. “I got to hear about it last night in a damp tavern. Smelt of fucking fish.”

Damon snorted.  

Ramsay folded his arms over the back of Theon’s chair and leaned closer. “I don’t think they like you, Theon. I think they want us to leave.”  Theon looked over at Ramsay with some trepidation and certain suspicion.

“What are you doing?” He whispered frantically while his face never lost its stone composure.  

Ramsay chuckled softly and said into his pet’s ear, “I don’t think your way is going to work with these men, Theon. These men have their minds set on what they want and too old and dumb for us to change their minds.”

He looked over at his Boys and smirked. The men were still gruffly taunting Theon, now for his too familiar man. The loudest one was the first to suddenly have a flipped axe go through his skull. Theon stood up in shock as Alyn whooped in joy at a perfect shot. The room burst into chaos and Ramsay shoved Theon down nearly under the small table. “Stay down until it’s over, love.” He casually ordered the protesting pet.

Theon crawled back. His eyes seemed to stare through the table, through the wall, through time into some place else or maybe many places at once. While he mind fled his body remembered and pulled his dagger. He crouched, shaking and panting as though with grave fever. His eyes darted, blank but vigilant, blind yet seeing.  

“Is it him?” one of the men shouted. “Look at his eyes! It’s the Bastard of Bolton!”

“I told you I didn’t kill him,” Theon chattered, almost laughing. Ramsay grinned at the man and announced grandly, “Ramsay Bolton at your service, my salty, grizzled, useless Lords. Now, since you are unable to release me from that horrible fucking label that was a LIE, I don’t feel we can negotiate with you.” His smile was sharp, his eyes blazed and he was so ready. Ramsay felt the rage, that blood lust run through him and it was glorious. It was almost as good as fucking Reek.

The Boys rushed forward and Ramsay joined them. Most of these men were tough, grizzled or not but they were not prepared for what these Northern men could do. “Take your time Boys, these men aren’t used to fighting on land.” Ramsay taunted, actually pulling back long enough for them all to stand and arm themselves. Skinner laughed and asked, “Should we go onto one of their ships and have the fight there?” The men were terrified but incensed now and they attacked. Ramsay and the Boys started to cheer and this seemed to unnerve the men worse.

Ramsay had meant what he said to the Boys and they all took their time. Minor wounds were all they suffered. They didn’t just kill these arrogant fucking Lords, they slaughtered them. Hacking off limbs first, leaving them to lay there staring at their appendages screaming while they attacked another. Once they were all down, they took turns going to each killing them. One had a sword plunged through an eye, another was disemboweled. Each of the boys and Ramsay all had the same expressions. This was what they knew how to do best. This is what makes their blood rush, gives them purpose. It was the look on the face of a man having the best orgasm of his life.

“No,” Theon choked. “No, no.” A warm pool of blood oozed onto his hand but he was petrified and could not recoil.

Only one remained and that was Erik. As soon as the fighting started, per Ramsay’s earlier instructions, Alyn went for the man. He brutally disarmed the startled man and then whacked his head into the stone floor. As soon as the he went limp, Alyn tied his arms behind his back. Kicking the unconscious Lord against a wall, away from the fighting, Alyn had then jumped into the fray.  Now with all the corpses littering the floor, Ramsay turned his attention to the figure against the wall. His smirk was so familiar, it was a special kind of look, mirrored on the Boys faced. Interrogations, tortures, this is also their specialty. And they hunger for it as if starved for years of true sustenance.

“Reek, I want you to leave now. You don’t need to be here for this meeting anymore. Let Master handle this and you can go rest upstairs.” Ramsay’s voice was an old one too, he hasn’t sounded like this in some time. He felt, alive, he felt dangerous and he suddenly NEEDED Reek to leave. He didn’t want Reek to hear him this way, to see him this way, not ever.

Theon was quietly sputtering under the table in a pool of blood. It took everything to fight against himself. Don’t run. Don’t fight. Don’t run. Don’t fight.  He clutched his dagger to his heaving chest as though he'd forgotten how to use it.

“I mean it, pet. Leave right now.”

Theon whined but then a familiar leaden calm took over Reek. It had brought him through far worse. With dagger in hand, and bow and quiver still slung round his back, he slowly crawled out, stopping at Ramsay’s boots he tried to climb to his unsteady legs.

Ramsay helped him to stand and gently took the dagger.. Reek couldn’t look at the black bloodlust on his face. He swallowed and, with a bobbing nod, took his first step towards the door. “Where are you going?” Ramsay patiently reminded him.

“Directly to my chambers, Master,” he uttered in a dry, weak voice.

Smiling, his blood still up but feeling only affection towards his pet, Ramsay cooed. “Good boy, Reek. I will be up to bed a little late tonight.” After Reek staggered towards the door, the Boys started to try and wake up the man. Suddenly, Ramsay lunged for his pet who was almost out the door. He wrapped a fist in the thick shining hair and pulled Reek in for a kiss. It was bloody, it was savage and it was full of a  dark, bitter love. Ramsay tasted tears but couldn’t or wouldn’t think of which one of them might be crying. He broke away then whispered in Reek’s delicate ear, “I love you. I won’t ever hurt you like this, ever. I love you and you are safe, I am here to take care of things. Wait for me nestled in the blankets on the bed. I will come to you later and show you how much I love you.” Then he shoved his pet away and went into the room, shutting the door, locking it.


	11. I Never Meant For Us To Get This Lost

In a grey mist Theon followed a path through barren sand. His tower loomed some paces ahead. He stopped to stand where the worn path diverged. Damp fur slid under his naked hand. He smiled weakly and stooped to pet Solace.  Her tail wagged low and anxiously. Her white triangle ears lay flat against her head as she kissed his face and whined softly.

 

“Severin.” He tried shaking the boy’s shoulder. “Severin, wake up.”

The boy started and cried out. “Don't kill me, please!”

Theon stood and stepped back. “I… I would never…”

“Lord Theon?” he scurried through the dark to light his lamp.

“No, no light. It is I. You can feel my hand if you must,” Theon attempted to joke.

Starlight from the window framed the boy in the softest white silhouette. His tousled mess of hair approached Theon slowly then two little hands took his own. His spider fingers gingerly traced Theon’s palm and found where his pinky was missing.  “Did it hurt?”

“Yes.”

“All of them?”

“All of it. I see Sentry has been keeping by your side.”

“I think she truly does like me.” Severin hadn’t yet dropped his hand. “What is it, my lord? I swear I will be brave.”

Theon knelt, blessing the dark. “I need to ask something of you; a secret, special task. This is very important, Severin.”

“Of course! I am your man!”

“I need you to take my girls to my saltwife and our children. Tell her I know of the horns she gave me. Tell her I will support her and the children as long as she keeps my dogs well and takes you as our own.”

“But I cannot!” his voice wobbled even as he shouted.

“You are a good man, Severin Greyjoy. Take my girls to guard my family. Give this letter to her guards. Go quickly and quietly.” Theon grunted and pushed himself from the floor but the boy surprised him, wrapping his little arms around Theon’s neck. Theon both froze and warmed. “I must go now, but I will send word soon. “ Theon pulled away and hurried out.

He hadn’t yet stepped into the courtyard when he saw Alyn watching him. He forced himself continue to his chambers but stopped when Alyn followed. “What is it? Does he need me?”

“Did you get lost, Reek?”

“No. I dismissed my thrall.” _Theon,_ he silently corrected.

“This late? He must have been sleeping”

Theon pointed cooly. “Those are my servants' quarters. You saw me walk out and I suppose you saw me walk in as well. I gifted the boy my dogs.” Theon looked Alyn over. He appeared less like a man and more like a frowning weight Theon had been chained to. “It seems I no longer need them to follow me everywhere, do I?”

Alyn shrugged and smirked. “‘Spose not.”

 

Theon set a basin over his fireplace and poured a carafe of water in. He went to his liquor cabinet while the water warmed and found it completely barren. His bloody hand flew to his face in distress. It felt cool and sticky on his face. The pool under the table must be clotting by now. He pulled the offending hand away and stared. Who’s blood was it? It struck him as unfathomable that this stain he must wash away had pumped through a living heart. He should have accepted such things by now… and not others.

After losing some time to fog, Theon stood and shed his soiled tunic to wash his face, hands and chest as best he could. He vaguely remembered hearing of mainlanders who washed their favorite pig before sacrificing it.

 

Ramsay pulled blood soaked hands away and smiled sweetly at the pitifully babbling man. “You promised, you swore I could die if I told you everything!” Nodding, Ramsay looked at the man solemnly. “You are right, I did. And I do keep my word.” Without another look at the man, Ramsay said to Damon “Gut him. So he does die tonight.”

He continued to head out the door. He made sure that no one saw him heading into the castle, as bloody as he was. He headed for the bath but he was worried about Reek.So Ramsay went to see if his pet was lying in bed, shaking, awake, waiting for him or if Theon had convinced him to some drunken alone time.

 

 _If only I could sleep, then maybe I would open my eyes to sunlight_. He had woken up to Ramsay laying beside him before. That was often the start to better day than the others. He could stare at Ramsay then, trying to understand. The monster seemed a child when sleeping in the morning light, his brow relaxed and lips eased apart by his slack jaw. Theon pulled the blankets over his head. Each creak of settling wood, each breeze sounded like the door opening and he'd startle and grimace.

 

Ramsay quietly walked down the darkened hallway and nodded to Alyn leaning against the wall. “I am just checking on my boy before getting this kraken filth off of me.” Alyn shrugged and Ramsay thought, why the fuck did I just explain myself to him? With a yawn, Alyn seemed to actually wake up for a second. “Reek went for a walk. Gave his doggies away and dismissed his little maid. Then came right back here and I haven’t heard him since.” Saying nothing further, Ramsay entered the bedroom. He prayed he would not see Theon drunk and swaying while waxing dark sea poetry or something. It would set him off and he was nervous to be near Theon this soon after such bloodlust.

 

The room was dark except for Ramsay’s small candle. He made out his sweet shaking Reek in the bed and smiled. Putting the candle on a small bookcase, Ramsay went closer. He just wanted to give one touch, one kiss and that was all. But when he started to reach out, he saw the blood. Yanking his hand back, he chose to just watch his pet for a second.

Then he whispered, “Reek? Are you awake? I just have to take a quick bath then Master will hold you, okay? No nightmares tonight, I am going to hold you and make you feel safe.”  Still riding on that sweet buzzing contentment such violence always brings him, Ramsay headed out the room with clothing and his flickering candle.

 

No Solace to pet. No rum to drink. No Sentry watching his door. He could only hear himself breathing louder and faster. He could only see the charred and skinless bodies. Muscle and gore, the black eye sockets staring into him.

Theon jumped up and started pacing his worn path. He buried his face in his palms. His legs carried him through the dark. _Theon, Theon, Theon, Theon, Theon_. He pressed into a cold corner still hiding his face. _Don’t run, don’t run, don't run_ , “Don’t run, don’t run, don’t run.”

Ramsay scrubbed himself so that not a single foul bit of those krakens would touch his Reek. He was relieved to have seen his good sweet boy in bed exactly as he was told to do. It is alright that his pet took a detour, Ramsay isn’t stupid. Theon is afraid that Ramsay will kill his dogs or his thrall. What he saw tonight scared him, it reminded him of what his Master was capable of.  Dunking under the water to rinse his hair, Ramsay sees an image.

Of a wide eyed, dead eyed trembling Reek in Theon’s armor, watching all the Ironborn flayed alive. He popped his eyes open and blinked away the water. No, it's not the same at all of course. Reek couldn’t really be comparing the two, would he? After all, to send away the two things that comforted him? Ramsay told him to get rid of the drinking, not the pets or the thrall. Would Reek really think this was Ramsay still just trying to trick him into slaughtering everyone then throwing his pet back in rags?

With a muttered curse, Ramsay hurried to finish his bath. Drying fast, he threw on his clothes and went to comfort his pet. Whatever he was thinking, Ramsay was sure it wasn’t good. Entering the room, Ramsay instantly saw his poor Reek lost in the corner, lost in the past. “Oh fuck, Reek. I am so sorry, my love. Yes, I know, don’t fight, don’t run. You are safe, you are being such a good boy, Reek.”  Theon clawed the walls pushing back in the corner. “Hush, I just want to bring you to the bed, my love.” He spoke very softly and moved very slowly as if trying to reach a wild animal. Ramsay crouched down before the terrified boy he loves and destroys.

“I… I’m not tired,” he tried desperately.

With heartfelt intensity, he says, “Reek, I love you so much. Let Master take you to bed and make you all safe. I won’t let anyone hurt you, my special good boy. It is alright, look, you are in your very comfortable bedroom and here is your soft nice bed. I am going to lift you and put us under the covers.” Theon grunted and spasmed at Ramsay’s touch, but he clenched his jaw and fists instead of fighting. “Good boy, Reek. Hush, you are safe, Master has you.”   

“Why was I spared but none of my brothers? Why do you kill everyone but me? Why the fuck can’t I kill you?” His voice cracked and he cried helplessly, “I can’t even try!”

Ramsay held his pet even closer, one hand stroking his fragile throat. “I would never kill you. I won’t ever even hurt you the way I used to. Remember I promised that, silly boy? This was different than the past, Reek. Can’t you see that? These men were against you, they would have harmed you to get you out of their way. If they even thought that Euron would rise forth, they would slaughter you like a pig. They never would have followed you, love. And they would be in the way of a lovely little plan I have for us, my Reek.”

Theon knew it was true. His Adrenalin was depleted at last and his body sagged into a limp weight.

Nuzzling into Reek’s neck, sniffing deeply, Ramsay muttered, tired now, “Why would you ever want to me kill me, Reek? I am a monster, but I am your monster.”

Theon whined and rolled his bleary eyes to the ceiling. “You belong to me, and I belong to you?”

Smiling, moving his nose up Reek’s neckline then tracing it along Reek’s jaw to nibble at his ear, he whispered, “Yes, Reek. I belong to you as much as you belong to me. We need each other, my lovely boy. Each of us cannot survive without the other. I love you, Reek, maybe even more than you could ever love me.”    

“ _Theon_ ,” he whispered, nearly pleading.

Freezing, carefully releasing Reek’s earlobe, Ramsay asked, “What did you say?”

“I do love you, Master.”

Ramsay sat up and turned Reek over. “Look at me, what did you say, Reek?” His voice allowed for another chance, it wasn’t colored with violence yet. The fear that was icing his warmed heart was starting to get unbearable. Then Reek’s eyes found him but he said it again. “Theon. Please?” And Ramsay narrowed his eyes but he couldn’t strike, oh he wanted to, because he was scared of what Theon might do. That was certainly a first.


	12. Drowning Our Deities

Ramsay smashed in Theon’s face, he ripped out his throat all in three seconds. His mind also saw him just standing up and getting a flaying knife. Another helpful image was of him just leaping out the fucking window. The most intolerable image of all was him calling his beloved Reek by that horrid name wearing a fake smile. I can’t do any of those things. I promised him, I told him I loved him and meant it. I have to be calm, ask why, there has to be a reason. I can be logical and I can deal with reasons. Ramsay cut off the stupid babbling in his head, babbling just like...he shook his head hard.

“Why? Why do you want me to call you that?” He knew there was anger in his voice, it was dangerous and Ramsay couldn’t help it. It was the only way to hide the fear.  “You know our rules, Reek. We only use that other name in public, why should we bring it into our private, safe bed?” He tried to sound casual but when Ramsay tried to remove the anger from his tone, he heard a slight shake to his voice.

This was intolerable, unbearable and Ramsay pressed his nose against Reek’s. “I need a fucking answer, please.” He growled out, as his hands clawed at the pillow under that lovely tousled hair.

Theon swallowed and spoke softly. “Because you love me. Because I love you and I'm yours already. Because... it hurts and… maybe you don't want to hurt me like that any longer?”

It coated his throat with poison, with barbed wire but Ramsay managed it. “Theon..I don’t want to hurt you like that….I love you. Now don’t ask me to say it again tonight..that name.” He started to kiss his pet to make sure there would be no more words. Ramsay was too on edge, he felt too weak and for once, he felt himself backing down. Wrapping himself around his pet, Ramsay whispered harshly, “Go to sleep. We both need the rest.”

Tomorrow, I can deal with this situation, I will feel more in control after some sleep, Ramsay told himself. For now, Reek was way too overwrought, he needed to be soothed. He won’t ask me to say that name again, he was just too upset and I love him enough to endure such small slip ups. He thought that until he finally fell into a thin nervous sleep.

 

Theon sat in his bed, intact, unharmed, confused. Ramsay was leaner, harder than before but what was the real difference?

 

In the dungeon, on the saltier, Ramsay loomed, swept in and out of shadows, laughed and cut pieces of Theon away with glowing eyes. Reek had come to understand he was judgment personified. The Bastard hated Theon and reminded him to hate himself until he'd rather be a creature. Then the judgment became more merciful as he paid for his sins one scream at a time. The creature was a plaything, then the plaything a favourite pet, then something else, and he was grateful, but now he's Theon, only Theon. The Bastard of Bolton became the monster, the monster became Master. Who is he now?

His white chest rose and fell. His dark eyelashes fluttered then his head drifted to one side, sinking deeper into the pillow. He sighed. A wavy lock of dark chestnut clung to his brow. Theon gently swept it away with the disfigured hand he had made. “Ramsay?”

Ramsay opened his eyes, blinked to clear them to see his beloved boy looking down at him. “Morning already?” Stretching, he gave a kiss to the cheeks that did look much better not so gaunt or pale. “Shall we have breakfast? I have a wonderful plan to tell you all about, love. I have found it...my new identity! It suits me perfectly and I think I will look the part quite well. Not that your idea was bad, Reek, but this one, it really fits my personality and will work for the Boys too.” Ramsay stopped at the sight of his pet’s face, looking as if he was slapped. That is when he recalled the night before, the plea to call him Theon.

It took every inch of his willpower, he grabbed the table with his hands until splinters pierced his skin. “I am sorry. Theon. It will take me some time, pet. Is that okay, Theon? Can I still call you my pet, my boy, my love? Or shall we dispense with all that too?”  Ramsay couldn’t stop the bitter tirade then got ahold of himself. “You know what? I don’t think I am very  hungry. I think I need to go speak with Damon about something. I will tell you of my plans in a bit.”  Ramsay hurried to dress himself, trying to not act as if he were running away.

Theon slid through Ramsay’s arms as he pulled down his tunic and hugged his waist. “Master, please don’t leave. You aren’t truly leaving me, are you? Don’t you… I can still- I am still yours!” Theon had the mad, fleeting thought that he could _make_ Ramsay stay. His hands slid down to grip Ramsay’s hips.  With a hungry kiss he started pushing Ramsay back, away from the door.

Hearing his Reek speak, it was Reek no matter what name he wanted to use, it warmed him. Ramsay bit that bottom lip until he tasted the coppery liquid, only Reek had that particular taste that he thirsts for. Reek whined and melted for him. His fingers dug into Ramsay’s hips. “I will never ever truly leave you, get that through your foolish skull, puppy. Even if I am so angry I want to flay you, I would take a very long walk, but I wouldn’t leave you. I won’t hurt you like that, I won’t ever flay you, I won’t ever leave you. When you hear my plan you will understand. No one will ever question our closeness again. We will always be together, Reek. Theon.” It was still an effort to say the name, but he needed with a desperation for Reek to understand he won’t leave him. Not ever.  

“Alright,” Theon gasped. He licked his bottom lip then rolled into his mouth to suck the blood and make the bite feel fresh again. “Are you so hungry that you would not wait… a moment or so?” Theon swallowed and searched Ramsay’s eyes. With a nervous smile, he began to pull Ramsay’s tunic up over the groves on the alabaster stomach he remembered as being softer and wider before. “Lift your arms?”

Grinning back at the silly eager boy, Ramsay lifted his arms. “Are you trying to take advantage of me, young Lord?” He teased, watching Theon tug the tunic off with only minor difficulty. Ramsay found himself watching the muscles work under Theon’s flesh and resisted the urge to test the strength of them with his teeth. Instead, he stayed still, watching his pet. “Go on, then. Show me how much better you are than a hearty breakfast.” His voice still teased but there was a growl of need in there now.

Theon grinned and brought his fingers down Ramsay’s chest, along his hip bones to pull at his breeches. With a guilty smirk, he pulled Ramsay to bed and threw a pillow at his feet. His smile faded when he started to pull at the fine laces. He had to pinch a lace between his middle finger and thumb. He’d never got very good using it or used to seeing it. He tried just pulling them down in frustration, but Ramsay’s flesh was unyielding. “I can’t…” he knelt on the pillow and looked up.

His embarrassment was so out of place he almost laughed. “I can at least make you want me… if nothing else. They made up stories about me,” he began confessing with sudden urgency. “They think I killed you but it’s not truly because they give a shit about the stranger raised by their enemies, it has to be told for The Ironborn and their pride. If their prince killed you and … then what you did to them could be answered for. When I deny it, they always ask ‘How else did you survive him? No one else did. Not my uncle, not my brother...’ I still don’t have a good answer and Asha is always there to excuse my 'Northern modesty'.”  

 Theon realized how long he’d been talking without meaning to. I’m ruining it. He sucked his bottom lip where it bled and rolled his large eyes up. He tugged at Ramsay’s breeches again. “Please, Master?”

Ramsay grinned and watched Theon talk himself into Reek like always. He knew if he was patient it would happen all by itself. However, as much as Ramsay wanted it that way, this was not about what he needed. If Reek was to believe in Ramsay, enough to follow his ideas without force, he had to give his pet what he wanted.

“No, Theon...you said you would seduce me and I am waiting. Here, I’ll give you a small advantage and that is all.” Ramsay was proud that his voice remained velvet even using that name.  He undid the breeches and slid them down a little. “There you are. Now stop babbling and continue what you started. It was unfair to pretend at Reek talking to make me feel bad for him. Do your worst, Theon.” He gave a crooked smirk and waited to see what his boy would do next.

Searching Ramsay’s frosted eyes, Theon found no tricks. _He knows I never told those mummers tales._ Ramsay always knew when he was even considering lying, and always believed his Reek when he told the truth. He trusts me still. A warm weight fell into Theon’s chest. He needed the connection, the comfort, the words. _So take it._

 He yanked the breeches out of his way with a desperate tug. The smell took him back to a place safe, kind lush words, a shrinking feeling and sick twisting in his stomach. His body remembered what to do; on your knees, hold his thighs for balance, wet and slip out your tongue, open up, keep looking, use your weak need and beg.

He licked under along a pulsing fat vein, up to the head which he kissed. Precum stuck to his lips. His tongue ran along the bottom of the crimson head then swirled around. He watched Ramsay’s face, begging silently because it was his body’s secret and he didn't have the words. With a desperate reverence shining in his eyes, he took Ramsay into his throat.

Ramsay threw his head back and groaned. His hands played gently in the thick tousled hair, he must say, he does enjoy it clean and so soft like this.  “Good boy..such a good boy for me. I love how you do that with your tongue...but that is Reek, isn’t it? Sneaky boy, aren’t you?” Ramsay pulled Theon off him and lifted his chin up.

“I thought you wanted control this time? I thought you wanted to let Theon take control? I keep trying to give you what you want and you are trying to give me what I want. Make up your mind, sweetling. Do you want me to treat you like Reek or Theon? Call you Theon but treat you like Reek? I don’t understand your rules for this.”

Ramsay was breathing heavy, not out of anger but suppressed lust. He wanted badly to force Reek’s head back down and take what he wants.  On the other hand, as much as part of him never wants to see Theon take true control of their sex or anything else..he was somewhat curious.

Pulling the body he knew so well and is now relearning to him, he ran his hands down the narrow back. “I love it when you are like this. You know I do and I know there are so many things I do that you love. But show me this Theon...this new one...what does he like, what does HE want to do?” Ramsay tried to lighten it by teasing. “Come on now...surely there is at least one thing you want to do to me for your own pleasure? Or have me to do you? Here is your chance, love. I take away this offer in four...three...two..”

“No! I can do it!” Theon hesitated, looking again for any hint this was a test. Then, biting his creeping smile, he spun Ramsay and pushed him onto the bed. He got the oil his father once used on harpoon blades and dropped it on the nightstand. Then he went to his chest of drawers and sought out his belt.  Ramsay watched passively with a little smirk on his face. Ah, it will be some revenge play. That is fine, in fact, Ramsay thinks it's damned adorable.

Theon crept to the bed. His face was warming with a guilty smile. “Anything?” Ramsay licked his lips then bit his bottom one until it bled then began to lick his blood. “Yes, anything...well, almost anything. You may not flay me.” He said with a gentle grin then waited, blinking innocently. He figured Reek was going to spank him or maybe tie him up. That was fair enough.

Theon climbed on top of Ramsay and leaned down to ghost a teasing kiss. “Put wrists together, above your head.” Ramsay grinned more and complied. This was actually interesting and Ramsay was very curious to see what Reek’s mind has come up with.  Theon  bound the cool white wrists together and snaked the leather around the iron bars behind his many pillows, before looping back through under the buckle, securing Ramsay to the bed frame.

Theon pressed his lips together, stifling a giddy snicker. “I’ll show you what I always wanted to do, after,” he glanced at Ramsay’s tethered arms, “that.” Theon winked and kissed Ramsay deeply, but escaped with his lips and tongue before Ramsay could bite and snuck a bandana into Ramsay’s mouth and tied it securely around the back of his head. Okay, that got him and he knew he had a stupid look of shock on his face. Then he turned red but he was shaking with laughter at the same time.

Theon giggled, his head falling onto Ramsay’s chest. “I dreamed of doing that, my love, for years. It is clean,” he confided. Theon kissed Ramsay’s brow and pet the dark beard on his face. “You’re so handsome. Look at this,” he traced his fingers up the expanding and falling ribs to a muscle which shot out from his top ribs to his armpits. It made him look like an ivory viper. “I was never as hard or broad as you are. I suppose I never will be, will I?”

Ramsay found himself warming, melting into this new voice. He has never heard Reek sound this way, it was similar to his own tones. He started to breathe slower and sink into the mattress. Is this what his pet feels? It was wonderful and terrible all at once.

Theon fell to his chest, feeling the contours of the warm and powerful machine he was straddling. Lean as he was now, Ramsay’s chest still rose so high from the sheets. Nothing in life could make Ramsay smaller. Only death will shrink the powerful body he commands so well. Maybe Theon wouldn’t have to worry about, surely Ramsay would outlive him. Licking from Ramsay’s navel to his throat and up his square jawline, he heard himself whimper with need and arch his back, so he sat up at once to stop himself. Theon went to pull at a collar that wasn’t there. He sucked his raw bottom lip. The pain was reassuring. He cleared his throat and pursed his lips sheepishly. “Two more things. One just for me, one I hope you enjoy as well. Turn over.” Theon leaned in closer. “On your stomach.”

Ramsay frowned. Excuse me? That was the question shining icily in Ramsay’s eyes.   “Please? You said anything.” Theon pushed the bony ridges of his narrow chest against the smooth, resistant flesh of Ramsay’s and rubbed the ball of his foot into the arch of Ramsay’s. Dropping his chin to Ramsay’s sternum, Theon looked up with round, shining eyes. “ _Please_ , Master.”

Again Ramsay’s mind ran through several options that could happen here. None of them were good. If he said no, it will disappoint Theon and let him know that Ramsay can’t see him as anything but the old Reek. If he says yes what the hell might Theon do to him? He didn’t say that Theon couldn’t fuck him. What if that is what he intends? Wait, he might just want to spank him or whip him. Or probably at worst he will finger him, try and humiliate him a little.

Get ahold of yourself, think of the horrible things he has survived, that you did to him. Give him this one thing, would you? He tried to stop the hissing voices in his head and nodded. Go on, then. But you have to move me yourself. Show me your strength, if you are going to force me, get to it.

Theon jumped up and grabbed hold of Ramsay’s knee to flip him over. “Makes the restraints tighter when you flip from one side to the other.” Snorting to hide his small wince, Ramsay thought to himself, _let me guess, this is an Ironborn thing. Oh, you need to teach me this one later. Truly._  Ramsay lost focus of this when he felt cold leather on his ankles. He sucked in his breath and went still.

Theon used the dagger-holders he often buckled onto his thigh to restrain Ramsay’s ankle to one bedpost and then the other. He climbed back into bed, running his hands up Ramsay’s calves. He could actually feel two separate muscles flexing under the hairy skin. He hardly seemed to have calves since…

 _Theon, are you going through the trouble of tying me up to give me a massage?_ Ramsay quipped in his head to hide the fact that he was squirming into the mattress.   

Theon kneaded the taut muscles and hushed Ramsay before running his hands into the smooth dip behind his knees and onto his thick thighs. They were cut down the sides into two slabs of muscle. He grabbed onto Ramsay’s ass with both hands and watched his broad back arch. Something ignited within Theon, another instinct his body remembered, from long ago.

Standing so he could pull off his breeches, Theon drank in the sight and the realization hit him hard, clanging and reverberating, _Ramsay Bolton is bound at my feet_. Theon dropped to his knees, straddling the small of Ramsay’s back as the frame shook under them. He kissed up Ramsay’s spine to the nape of his neck. His eyebrow arched as he leaned around to Ramsay’s ear. 

 _Oh fuck, oh fuck, he is going to fuck me and why do I want it? I can’t allow this, it is too much, I haven’t since..I was terrified and hated it so much._ Even after father had stretched him enough that it didn’t hurt so badly, _I despised it._

That soft voice saying, “It is your own fault, boy. You said you would stay at any cost, that you would perform any duties I chose in order to be part of my family. To learn at my side rather than mill grain. So bend over and be grateful that I don’t just flay you for punishments instead.”  It ended when Ramsay started to actually become groomed enough to enjoy it. Hearing his son pant and grunt in pleasure, his cry of orgasm mingling with Roose’s was disgusting to him.  Ramsay never forgave his father for it and he supposed that he took some aggression over it out on Reek in the past.

 _If I can handle what my own father could dish out, I can take it from my little Reek. He means no harm, he will be gentle and want me to enjoy it. He will not truly ever hurt me and I have never feared him. He isn’t my father._ Ramsay finally relaxed and found himself lulling to his pet’s new voice.

“Ramsay. I like saying your name. I love this little point, here, at the top of your ears. There’s something…” Theon licked his lips and shook his head. “You are such a child in many ways,” his fingers combed through Ramsay’s full waves of dark hair. “Maybe I could hate you if you weren’t as terribly earnest in your absurd adoration for me; the hated man I was. Maybe if you didn’t soften towards me, if you didn’t go exert your everything to keep and protect me, or if you weren’t so handsome to me, or if you didn’t make me love you, or if I was not sick and ruined as I am. Whatever went wrong, I cannot hate you, only myself for loving you. I needed to tell you that.” He needed a drink, is what he really needed. He couldn’t stop now, while this inversion of reality still felt so natural.

Ramsay wanted to growl, he didn’t like where this seemed to be going, even if it wasn’t Theon shoving himself up Ramsay’s ass.

“I also wanted to tell you, Ramsay, my lord, my love, you are,” he bit back a cheeky grin and whispered close, “a spoilt fucking brat.” Theon licked his lips and sat up, swinging his leg around to sit aside his waist and smack his white ass. He watched the pink bloom in the shape of his hand while Ramsay growled. It was even missing a pinky. “Do you like that?” He leaned over to kiss Ramsay’s temple and lick up his square jaw. He sucked and nibbled on the edge of Ramsay’s little pointed ear and brought his hand down again.  Ramsay denied to himself the feeling of relief when it was indeed a spanking. He felt absurdly embarrassed over this and he was amazed how hard he became over it.

Pulling himself up, Theon rubbed Ramsay’s ass where it blushed. “Did your Lord father ever spank you? I doubt it. He said you were nearly grown when he took you in. That is shame. You are natural born lord. I did not forget, Master. I never will,” he said with feeling. “I swear it.” Ramsay rolled his eyes and thought dryly, _No, the only thing father ever spanked me with were his old withered balls. Go back to whacking my ass idiot._ Ramsay chewed on his gag and  gave Theon a glance that was half-warning, but Theon’s eyes recaptured the sly inner laugh they once held. “But you are a very naughty beast, my lord.”

Theon thought he knew how to make Ramsay enjoy his playful thrashing. He aimed at the spot which made him ache to his shame, years ago. Centered, and at the very bottom where the ass met his thighs, he spanked his lord and Master in a steady rhythm with firm strokes. Ramsay felt fireworks go off inside of him. It was pain and it was something else too. He well remembers doing this to his Reek. Oh shit. Oh no. He panted and chewed frantically on the gag.

“Do you feel it inside?” he gasped. “It will work its way up and create a kind of hunger you may fear.” He grew hard at the sound of the slap ringing out in the room and the red his hand was painting. “Do you like it yet? A little?” Ramsay was writhing, fighting against himself, Theon knew too well. “Worry not,” he soothed. “It’s only I, your pet. What is there fear from me? I beg of you, enjoy it, Master. I want to please you.”

 _I am, you stupid thing, oh, I hate and love it. Thank you so much for gagging me truly. If I had to beg you to stop or keep going I could never look at you in the morning. Oh wait, it is morning._ Oh _Gods, stop, please don’t stop._ Ramsay whined out loud. Theon kissed the nape of his neck, sucking the spine where it poked to meet his tongue.

He rolled away and snatched the bottle of oil. “Does your bottom sting, Master? Let me make it all better.” He oiled his hands first and slowly smoothed the bottom of his ass, where it was red. “Did I teach you a lesson?” he whispered. Ramsay nodded without thinking, melted, gone. “I should take extra care, right here.” his fingers slipped between the cheeks. He rubbed and circled.

Fireworks became almost blinding then and _oh, he is, he's going to-I am whimpering, pleading dammit. I can’t breathe and now I can’t stop whimpering. Fuck._

Ramsay sounded panicked at his own pleasure. “Hush, it’s only I. We are safe and alone. You know I could never hurt you, Master.” He gently spread the pink cheeks. His voice was sweet and soft. “Let me kiss it better.” He tongued gently and squeezed Ramsay with both hands when he arched his back moaning. He circled gently toward the center until Ramsay started to yield and open for him. Theon was truly swept away now.

Ramsay lost all coherent thought and gave in. He chewed so hard on the gag, sucking on it now and he couldn’t stop the whining. It wasn’t fearful, no not anymore.  

Theon could hardly keep himself waiting any longer and started to slick his throbbing cock as he slid one finger inside, then another. Ramsay gave a startled growl and tensed for a second. _I can’t, I can, I can’t._ Then Theon’s voice cut through the panic. “Easy, easy.” He had soothed a wild horse who would have his hand. Theon knew a gentle touch and patience could tame and fierce and wild beast. He felt the bump of smooth, firm flesh inside and rubbed against it, eagerly.

Each time Ramsay whined helpless in waves of ecstasy, Theon grew and ached, throbbing with need. “There you go. Isn’t it good, Master?” His eyes watered from the agony of restraint. “Let me please you.”

 _Yes, please, oh please, fuck me, take me, please, thank you for gagging me._ Ramsay’s head rolled back and it was all Theon could stand. “Oh, fuck.” He hastily made sure his cock was well-oiled, as he held it firm and entered at last. Ramsay cried out in pain mixed with such a dark pleasure hitting him so hard. Moaning softly, Ramsay just dropped his head down. It was horrific bliss.

Theon rolled back to stare at the ceiling with bulging eyes. “Ah, gods.” He wrapped an arm around Ramsay’s ribs and panted, “I love you, you fucking monster. I love you, you should have killed me.” He rubbed his face into Ramsay’s back then pulled himself up and grabbed Ramsay’s hips. He was moaning in throes of pleasure, not pain, so Theon lost himself and grabbed Ramsay’s hip and cock.

“Come for me, please. Please, Master.” Ramsay seemed to be fighting it but Theon had such a need. It felt like it was meant to be, that it could change everything for the better. “Master, please, come for your pet, for your Reek.”

Oh _Gods, you don’t understand Theon. Not this way, because it was always so good which was so bad._ A quick flash of a shameful desperate teen begging his father to fuck him harder. How every time he spoke or tried to participate his father hit him in disgust.

“You actually enjoy having your father pump his hard cock into your ass as if you were a common whore. What a shameful son you are, Ramsay. Fine, I will allow you to finish, but stay still and keep your sick mouth shut.” Just after Roose would finish with a dignified grunt, he would sneer, “I don’t want you running around Dreadfort in search of other cocks so you can orgasm. So go on, whore, grind yourself against my cock. Move yourself into my hand, hurry before I don’t bother anymore with you. There, good boy, there is a good whore. What do I want to hear when you go?” And as Ramsay swam in disgust and pleasure, he would peak and cry out, “Thank you, Father!”

Yet, Ramsay found himself moaning in pleasure alone now and Theon wasn’t disgusted. He wasn’t anything but in pure bliss. I _am his monster and he never wants to be mine. Reek is not my father, Theon isn’t like my father. I need to...it feels so amazing and I can’t hold back. Oh Gods, Theon, Reek..thank you for gagging me, thank you!_ Ramsay felt the feelings all surge through his body and pulled straight into his cock. He began to shudder and cry out a bit in high pitched voice.

Oh, thank you for gagging me, Reek please, Theon, I have to, and then he did. As he spilled onto the sheets, Ramsay heard in his head a calm small voice saying, “Thank you, Theon.” It chased him into a desperate space and Ramsay wanted to be held. He wanted it over and Ramsay tried to ignore his fear. Tried not to allow anger to soothe it.  

When Theon finished, Ramsay probably didn’t even feel it. There was no seed to spill when he came now, even when it had been awhile. Feeling the pulse and mess of  Ramsay’s small death in his hand helped him feel his own pleasure better somehow. Theon collapsed on Ramsay and held him, as though he feared Ramsay would leave. “I love you, Ramsay,” he choked and drifted to dreaming before he could realize what he had done.

At first, Ramsay was relieved that Reek was asleep since he was crying a little.  

Once the tears ended and Ramsay stopped shaking, he started to become irritated. His mood was already a little dark right now.

“Theon! Wake up! It is breakfast time, not bedtime.” Of course, all the snoring Theon might have heard was a muffled garble of thanks to the damned gag. With a growl, Ramsay started to try and wake Theon by lurching upwards


	13. Blinded and Gagged Together

Theon coughed upon rousing and, refusing to wake, squeezed Ramsay tighter. His belly was softer once. Theon mused that it would be so again as he got older. 

Ramsay bucked him mumbling something. “Ah!” Theon started and sat straight up. “What? What is it?” He scanned the warm, empty room. Soft light came through his rustling curtains. Theon exhaled and scratched his head. He looked over his shoulder, found Ramsay and remembered everything at once. He looked to the door and wondered if the hall might be empty. It must, as it was hardly dawn.

“Oh,” he said softly. “I am so sorry. Here, I will release you.” Theon sucked his sore lip and leaned closer to steal a glimpse of Ramsay’s mood. Ramsay forced himself to look his pet in the eyes. He made sure his weakness, his fears were hidden, he also banked the rage that wanted to grow. _Careful, careful for his sake and mine,_ Ramsay thought.

Theon slipped off the bed and crept around it. He pulled his britches on and reached for a leather strap binding Ramsay’s left foot, then stopped. “Don’t be mad,”he asked then smiled playfully, “or I may have to keep you here and pleasure you until you forgive me.”  Ramsay rolled his eyes and waited, trying to smile through the gag. He didn’t move until Theon removed the bindings and the gag. Then he slowly stood up and stretched. Like a viper, his hand shot out and grabbed Reek by his hair and pulled his head back, baring his throat. Ramsay first licked a path on the delicate skin, then bit down until Reek whimpered.  

“I enjoyed that. But not as much as I enjoy taking you. Now it is time for breakfast and a conversation. Help me get dressed, pet.” Ramsay released Reek’s head and felt order starting to be restored and his wolfish grin grew more confident. He pushed what just happened to the back of his mind. He needed to get Reek to understand what he will be doing. His pet should be well sated and happy now, this should not be a problem, but just in case, Ramsay wanted full submissive, adoring attention. Just in case.

Theon held Ramsay’s heavy leather jerkin. It was torn at the left shoulder. “I should call for tailor. I haven’t even had your clothes cleaned. I think your men may want something lighter for islands?” He inhaled deeply and rose to stand at his full height. “There are trunks of my… of men's clothing, men who no longer need them.” Theon pulled on his simple cotton tunic and soft leather boots. “I'll send for them and ask that breakfast be sent up for you and I.” He stopped at the door. “I will hurry back.”

“Wait! The clothing actually is something I wanted to talk to you about. It is part of this conversation we really need to have. Call for breakfast and you can order a tailor later on. This is important, Theon. Order food and come sit down so we can talk.” Ramsay left no room for anything but compliance in his tone and allowed the ice to fill his eyes. He could always tell when his pet was trying to escape and he can always tell when his Reek was trying to gain some control. Right now Theon seemed to be attempting to do both.

Leaning back into his seat, Ramsay waited for Reek to do as he was told but he was curious if Theon would decide differently.

“Oh,” Theon hung in the doorway looking at his boot. His foot always appeared whole in a boot, he even walked better. “Alright.” He shut the door and wandered down the hall watching his feet.

When he caught sight of Skinner leaning against the wall, Theon looked him directly in the eyes and flashed a sly grin.

 

“Gwyn.”

She did not hear him over the dishes clanging in her tub, but sang to herself about a scorpion and frog crossing a river.

“Gwynesse.”

She looked up and started, clutching her chest. Her strange, gloomy Lord always appeared unexpected and spoke softly from shadowed entries. “Your grace?”

“I would break my fast in my chambers… with my guest.”

“Of course, your grace.” She hastily dried her fine sun-kissed hands on her apron. “SEVERIN!”

“I sent him away.”

“Then-”

“Give me the tray.”

“But,” she frowned, taken aback, “the Northern men, they are your thralls… are they not?”

“Perhaps,” he gestured for her to hurry, “though I wouldn’t say so where they could hear.” He winked at her and she blushed. “Fetch me that black bottle my lady sister brought.” He leaned on the counter, watching her.

When his stomach was warmed and his nerves steadied he sighed and set the bottle behind a jar of preserved pomegranates, right at the entrance he favored. “Gwynesse,” she never noticed what beautiful eyes he had, like calm summer seas, “keep this here for me and keep it full. Can you do me this special task?” He smiled, yet his pretty eyes looked tired. “Good. Don't send anyone to my tower, barring emergencies and watch yourself around those thralls.”

Though he acted as if in a great hurry, when the tray was brought to him, he sighed and seemed to have work his courage up to take it and leave.

 

It was a nice quiet walk back. He needed a much longer walk alone soon. Theon stopped in front of his room and looked to Damon. “Breakfast is ready in the hall. Could you get the door?” He lifted the tray a bit to show his hands were full.

 

Damon gave a wide grin and his eyes practically twinkled.  “Of course, Lord Theon.”

Theon looked Damon over as though he were a puzzle. His lips pursed as he suppressed a knowing grin. “Thank you.”

 

“You must be starving. Look what they cooked for you,” he said with a shy excitement. “Lamb. I asked that yours be raw.” He went about setting two places across the table from each other. “So, what do you have to tell me?”

Ramsay looked at Theon with deep suspicion. He wanted to demand that Reek let him smell his breath but he needed to let that go right now. They will be discussing him sneaking drinks later, though. He can tell by the extra cheerful babble that Theon is nervous, is trying to hide it. He never catches on that the better his act, the easier it is for Ramsay to see it. But now is not the time to get into a confrontation or act the disciplinarian. So Ramsay filed it away for later ammunition when needed.

“Start eating first, pet. You are still a bit thin, you need to eat more."

Theon sat with a tight smile. He felt as though he was losing battle after battle. 

"Good. Now I’ll begin. We have a new plan. Everyone that knew, that has met Euron Greyjoy besides yourself is dead or gone missing. The last link was Erik who was quite forthcoming with information concerning Euron and his crew. Since no one really knows where the man is, I am giving him a glorious return. My Boys are not suited to playing thralls or bodyguards to a  recluse Lord. They are meant for adventure, for domination and fighting. They shall become pirates that have returned with the terrifying legend that is Euron Greyjoy. I even have a patch for my eye. Euron has returned and will help his beloved nephew or gloomy young Lord Reaper. No one will dare to question, all will fall under the legend alone, we won’t have to hurt anyone. We might have to intimidate, fool and lie, but we won’t be savages, I swear it. Think of all we can gain, Theon. Think of what we can turn the Iron Islands into?” Ramsay leaned closer and waited for what his Reek would say.

“NO!” Theon jumped back, knocking over his wine and his chair, “you don't understand! They know,” he pointed to the door then swept his finger along the horizon out the window, “they all know that I'm disfigured! They know how I was kept by you! They'll think-” but what protest could he make that wasn't true? “Asha! What will we do about Asha?” he tried to calm down and shrugged as though he had just realized a simple error and otherwise agreeable plan.

Ramsay watched as Reek panicked and he was instantly on his feet. “Calm down, pet. No, don’t clean it up, I will get it. Your hands are shaking too much. Sit down and breathe for me, Reek.” Theon groaned and backed away. “I know you like the other name but right now I need you to calm down. So sit down for me like a good boy and let me clean up this mess, clumsy boy that I love.” His voice was as velvet as when he was fucking his pet into a screaming orgasm. It had a condescending tone that suggested darker, far better or worse things depending on obedience.   

Theon searched the room with wild eyes. He had sent away his guards, his servants, his dogs, he even gave his dagger away. The hopelessness of things brought a dreadful calm. He lowered his head and slumped into his chair.

Ramsay quickly cleaned the mess and tried to speak very slowly and calmly. “I will admit, my love, that I did not expect you to be this upset over my idea. Asha is gone, Theon. She won’t be back, you know that.”

“But-”

“If she does manage to somehow return here then I can deal with her. You can deal with her with my assistance if you’d rather. Even if she did return by the time Asha ever got back here, it would be too late. You have rights, my boy, use them, take them! I will get you everything that is yours by right. We can restore your good name, tell tales that can scare small children. Make new tales that will make all young boys want to be like us someday. Theon, think of all the good you can do if you rule this entire fucking rock. You love to help others, you want to protect and provide for your people, don’t you? This is your chance to finally do that.”

Here was the rough patch, here was the touchy subject that Ramsay knew was haunting Reek. He had heard the rumors of the types of pets Euron had kept. Ramsay knelt before his pet and gently held his worried face. “Listen to me very carefully. I know all about Euron’s interests. His pets.” Theon jerked with a grunt.  “And though you truly are my beloved pet, the world will never see the collar. I won’t walk about wearing my patch and pulling on your leash. You are my beloved nephew Theon Greyjoy who has gloves and boots and charm. Theon will not be seen by his scars for anything but brave endurance.  It will surprise no one that Euron might fall in a form of love with his nephew.  That he would keep him close by.”

“Ugh,” Theon reeled and held his stomach. “It would surprise _no one_ at all.” He shook out a shiver.

“However, you will not be any less of a partner. You would be equal, if not greater. Here is your great opportunity to really use that wit and charm that you try to still hide away. I want to give you everything you deserve, Theon. Don’t be scared of a gift from your Master. And understand I make a sacrifice here too, I must offer you my total trust. Because this is the most amount of freedom and choice I could ever offer you. I am offering you power over everyone but me.”

“I hate Euron,” he mumbled, but that wasn’t quite true. “He always scared me.” He looked at Ramsay’s eyes. This wasn’t Euron but what was the difference? _Because he is my monster._ He was pulled two ways: to stand; raise and deepen his voice or to hide in Ramsay; to nuzzle and shake and beg for comfort. He may be able get some of the space he desperately needed. Yet, Theon was also overwhelmed, already exhausted by the game before they started.

If he traded more control for comfort, he feared he would never win it back, so he stood to pace and think. “I see. Well, you can take your fleet I promised and your island.” A sad smile curled the corner of his mouth.“You will be every bit the pirate he was… or is… He could not come out of Westeros alive. Do you think?”

Ramsay began to lose his temper in spite of his best intentions. “Oh stop the pity! I don’t want to take away your fucking fleet and island, I want to give it all to you! You would love it if I did just take over, wouldn’t you? Then you could drink yourself to death while walking dogs on the fucking cliffs and never have to take a single chance. Without having to fear things or interact with anyone. And it is mostly my fault you are that way. Mine and your damned family. But here I am, Theon! I came to you, I love you, I have begged your forgiveness for the things I have done. I am trying to abide by everything you ask of me and you cannot trust me still. I have let you do something to me that I allow NO ONE to do. And it isn’t enough. Will anything ever be enough for Theon Greyjoy? I come to you and offer you all that is left of whatever type of monster I am now. You tell me yes then try to drink me away. You say I am your Reek but call me Theon. I am your Master yet I let you top me. I am a confused man here, Theon. What the fuck do you want from me? I offer you everything and you run away, you throw it back at me. Was it all a form of revenge on me? If so congratulations, well done, My Lord.” Ramsay gave an exaggerated curtsy then deliberately stood as far from Theon as he could.  

“I would say it was such a good revenge it was worthy of my father, Theon. You get me to come to you, admit that I love you. Get me to actually care, to let you manipulate me like I did to you before. Then fuck me in every possible way you can before telling me to bugger off.” At first, Ramsay said it because he was mad but by the time he finished his speech, he was believing it. “Wonderful work, Theon. You have surpassed your Master in torture. Did you hear my father one on of the few occasions he would taunt me with our sordid past? Did you hear him force me over the table on the nights he was angry with me? Or did you just want to top me but knew you couldn't fully make it rape? Oh Gods, I need  to get away from you. Don’t come near me and do not leave, do not think I am leaving you. But it isn’t very safe around me right now, Theon.” Ramsay couldn’t help the scalding tears and he knew that Reek, no not Reek, Theon saw. And that hurt just as terribly as his feeling that he might have just been played by the only creature that the monster would ever love.  He blindly stumbled out the door and shoved past Damon to run down the hallway.

Theon stood panting, staring at the open door. “I don’t understand anything,” he gasped, but Ramsay was gone. “Ramsay!” He found the room flying past. He ran out down the hall until he was caught and lifted. “Get off of me!”

“No,” Damon didn’t have to exert much effort to take him back to his chambers. “You are to stay here.”

“I can’t!” Theon kicked and hit but Damon seemed made of stone and soon his boulder arms squeezed Theon into submission.

“You know there is no talking to him when he’s like this. Look what he’s doing for you, huh?” Damon patted his head and put him on his bed. “He left so he wouldn’t you know,” he couldn’t help but grin, pinching Theon’s thumb.

Theon yanked his hand back and crawled away. “I hurt him?” He shook his head and wrapped arms around the legs he pressed into his chest. “I didn’t… I didn’t want to! I didn’t know I _could_ or that anyone could! I didn’t know…” he hid his head, pushing his knees into his eyes until he saw stars. “I don’t know what to do. I didn’t want to hurt him. I didn’t tell him to bugger off!”

Damon snorted.

Theon slowly peeked out between his knees. “What?”

Damon sat at the foot of the bed, popping the mattress up underneath Theon. “You…” he leaned to look towards the hall and waited a moment to listen, then sat back and smiled, “you two are much like a newly married couple,” he laughed and kept laughing.

“I don’t understand. This is horrible.” Theon squinted at Damon, trying to see the joke. “I ruined everything. Wh-why are you laughing?”

Damon ran his fingers through his hair. “Look, you had those dogs, right? You told them what to, they obeyed. They followed you, they loved you, they worried after you, enjoyed your affection, begged for your attention-”

“Yes, so?”

“What if you didn’t send, let's say, the white one away. What if one day she started talking and told you she had her own separate life to go live, would you mind getting out of it?”

Theon hid his face again and told the warm dark, “But, I am not a dog.”

“I’m simply telling you how he thinks.”

Theon looked up again, wiping his eyes. “Thanks for…” he swallowed, unsure of what he was thankful for exactly, “your k-kindness.”

Damon smirked. “You never bothered me.”

“I d-don’t w-want to be in my s-skin anymore.”

“Uh, the thing I said about being married, what I mean is... you’re both trying to have a relationship and, ha ha, you’ll see. It will get easier.” Damon frowned at Reek’s tremors. “You are a fucking mess, eh?”

Theon curled up tighter and whispered, “I w-was bad.”

“This is called a fight. It happens. Hey!” Damon jumped up when Theon ran to the balcony, but stopped when he heard the retching.

 

Theon leaned with his head pressed to the railing. He watched the waves crash on the rocks below. It’s a long, fitting, fall.

“Here.” Damon gave him a kerchief.

“Th-hank you.” He wiped his brow then mouth and sunk to cold floor. The wind stroked his back as he searched the shoreline. “I have to go find him. He’s all alone.”

“No, you’ll go lay down.”

“He’ll think I don’t even care unless I find him and make him-”

“He wants you safe in bed. I will tell him that I said so.” Damon picked the shaking waif off of the cold, wet balcony.

“Don’t you want to revenge him on me?”

Damon rolled his eyes. “How sweet,” Damon shook his head, “and fucking stupid.”

 

As soon as Damon shut the door, Theon pulled the blankets over his head and tried to figure things out.

 

Ramsay had only cried for a moment but to think that Reek and possibly Damon saw it, that fueled his rage. Slamming his fists into the wall, growling, and panting, he tried to gain control. There was movement nearby and Ramsay stiffened like a predator that can sniff out the prey. The serving girl walked past never seeing the danger and there was a second that Ramsay almost attacked. He could have easily taken her, driven her outside for a hunt. Or just raped and tortured her right there. Who could stop him? And it will soothe this rage that was very dangerous to Theon, to anyone right now, really.

Then he reminded himself what he has promised Reek. If he rapes, hunts or flays this pretty girl, this servant under Theon’s protection, it is betraying his pet. He has tried to persuade Theon that his new way can create safety and peace. Ramsay can no longer just use a servant or random peasant for release. Even as Euron he will have to truly restrain himself to only tormenting and killing prisoners. I really have given Theon control over me and my actions, haven’t I? Ramsay left the keep fast, he was avoiding everyone including his own Boys. He walked fast, stomping on flowers and clenching his hands so hard he dug nails into bleeding palms. I will gain control of myself, of Theon and the Islands.

He tried deep breathing and exercise, walking until he was aching. Thinking was no good, everything kept eating itself like a snake in his head. “I am losing the fucking battle here!” He screamed into the deserted beach as he kicked at the sand enraged. Then one of those stupid seagulls came shrieking by and swerved in a circle before landing. It was perched on one of the large stones, facing the ocean. Ramsay suddenly became silent and still, his teeth bared in a grin. His eyes were almost wild but every movement was graceful and swift. Within seconds, Ramsay had his hands around the skinny feathered throat and was strangling the large squawking creature. He killed it as slowly as he could then dropped the bird to the sand.

Ramsay took a deep breath and stared out into the immense moving blue expanse. Then he smiled, feeling calm and hopeful again. _I can do this, I can go fix things with my poor Reek. I was too harsh on him, I spoil him then I get harsh, it’s my fault. I can apologize for that then explain my plan more carefully this time. Reek isn’t trying to manipulate me and he loves me. I am sure of it and he needs to understand that I am going to take care of him whether he likes it or not. He will accept his role in this plan. Once Theon sees that Ramsay was right he will appreciate all that is being done for him._ He headed for the keep and even gave a small charming smile to the maid on his way to Theon’s bedchamber.

 

Damon scratched his neck and glanced away when Ramsay came storming back.

“Just what the fuck is so funny?” Ramsay yelled up at his chin.

Damon splayed his empty hands above his shoulders. “I said not a thing, my lord.” Ramsay sneered and looked over his shoulder at the door. “He’s in there. I made him stay.”

Ramsay paled, rolling his eyes back to Damon. “He tried to run?”

“To you,” Damon cooed, putting a hand over his heart. “Your puppy is waiting for you come back and kick him.”

“Good.” They heard Alyn coming down the hall.  “Good that you were here. Go eat and have baths drawn for yourselves, by order of,” Ramsay’s eyes flashed over a wide grin, “the _king_.”

 

Ramsay pulled back the covers to find Reek had passed out. There was a dark circle by his head where bed linen was damp. Ramsay pulled his sleeve down into his fist and used it to wipe the tanned cheek.

Theon’s eyes sprang open. “Ramsay,” he struggled up to sitting. “I’m sorry. I did _not_ mean to hurt you! I don’t know what I want or what to do. _I’m sorry!_ I do want you near but not so close, and I want to keep all my power but I also want to give it all to you, and I want to be alone but I don’t want you to leave.”

Ramsay stroked Reek’s hair but let him babble. He seemed to need to.

“I _am_ scared. That’s the thing. I am scared of you, of everyone, but you most of all. I was scared of  that child thrall who adored me! I cannot connect with people, lest they see how weak I am. I have to bite back any feeling they may not like and make a joke or smile because I could never afford to seem an enemy. I have to be arrogant and detached so I will not have my own feelings. You see? If I do not care, I won’t make people angry, or … passionate or even interested in me and that's what you have to do to survive. I mean… I only know how to live as a hostage. I can play a role if I have to, and I will. I can’t be … that scared boy in the painting. That’s...” he took Ramsay’s hands. “Do you see? I’m sorry! I’m broken. I swear I was not trying to trick or hurt you.” He squeezed and shook Ramsay’s palms. “You KNOW when I am lying! Look at me! I AM NOT LYING! _Please believe me!_ Please for-” Theon folded in half, racked with sobs. “I don’t know what to do, Master. I’m sorry…”

Ramsay hushed him then. “Stop, calm down, my love. You are not broken, you never truly were. You survived, as Reek, as Theon, doesn't matter. You were strong enough to survive in spite of all we had done to you. You are so much braver than you want to allow yourself to believe. The only part you have to act..is that I am Euron Greyjoy. Everything else is real, Theon.  You will truly be in charge of your islands, you will truly have power and I will be the support, the protection you need. I am not asking you to step behind me, Reek. I am asking Theon Greyjoy to stand next to me. See the difference? And you will always be my good boy, my foolish puppy and my weak adoring pet...behind closed doors. On occasion, I will be your bitch behind those same closed doors.” He kept kissing Reek’s curls and stroking firm lines down the slight back while he spoke.

“I am sorry. I acted like an ass. I know you would never betray me or use sex to hurt me that way. Forgive my temper tantrum. I reacted badly to hearing you disagree so strongly with me. I am still not used to it.” Ramsay gave a crooked smirk and confessed with some embarrassment, “I am used to just telling you what to do and having you simply comply. I have given you the chance to stand with me and that means you have a say in things too. It also means you have the right to an opinion without my flipping out over it. I will learn to control my temper and you will learn to trust me. We are going with my plan, Theon. It is a good one and it will work. Trust me enough to let us try, just give us this chance. I am going to prove to you that I am trustworthy. And then I am going to prove to you that you have power and worth.”

Theon swallowed. His throat was thick. He sucked at his lip and nodded. “Yes. Alright… I understand.” He peered up, nervously, but allowed himself to press into Ramsay’s chest. “I’m so tired. Can we… will you lay with me, just for a moment or two. Then I’ll eat. I swear it.” He pushed his nose up to Ramsay’s neck. So weak, he needed this one place to fall.

Ramsay wrapped his arms around his pet and whispered. “Good boy...my boy. I love you and you are doing so well regardless of what you think. Look, we are behind closed doors, little pet. So let your Master calm you, soothe you. I will make everything okay. Just for now, then I am going to have breakfast with Lord Theon.”


	14. Tides Change

Damon sat down heavily at the splintered thick wooden table, nearly knocking Alyn off the uncomfortable narrow bench. “Move over, I am starving. Finally been given leave by our King to come eat.” Reaching over he snatched a biscuit off Alyn’s plate. The maid came in with a platter of cheese, small fish and more biscuits. Leers and narrowed eyes followed her every movement and it made her nervous. Blushing, hands trembling slightly as Gwynesse put down a pitcher of water. Damon slid arm around her waist then his large hand covered her two smaller ones. “Sweet little mouse, don’t you have any ale or wine? We are men, we must have more than just water. We need something besides what you have in your stores, love.” As he spoke Damon tried to draw the squirming girl into his lap. “Come visit with us, girl. We just want some company, no need for you to panic.”

“Please! I can get some drinks for you.” The girl said desperately as she tried to extract herself from the large man. He might be handsome, but he was the size of a wall, carried a whip and worked with terrifying men. With a sigh, Damon released her and watched the maid flee the room. “Ah well, either she will return with mead or not at all. I hope she returns, I need some sport soon.”

Snorting, Skinner said, “If Ramsay carries out his plans we will have as many slaves as we can want. Salt wives are common around here and pirates always can get anything that they want. I am planning on having at least three or four salt wives of my own. Of course, that it is if our King of Tears goes along with his plan. Since our leader has started to allow his fucking creature to make his decisions for him, who knows what might happen next.”

Damon glared at Skinner and warned, “Watch your mouth, Skinner. Ramsay has kept us alive and well this long.”

“That bitch should be punished!” Skinner stabbed his knife into the table. “It ruined everything!”

“Shut it.” Alyn sneered.

Skinner looked over Damon’s shoulder. A slick smile cut across his face. Gwyn brought a clay pitcher. Damon’s shoulders relaxed just smelling the spices. “I mulled your mead.” Her smile was a wince. “Is that how you take it?”

“Warm and sweet smelling,” Skinner said leering, “that’s how I’ll take you.”

“Piss off,” Damon growled. “She’s mine! Isn’t she, Alyn?”

“Yeah.” Alyn poured himself a mug while Damon pulled the girl into his lap.

“And why the fuck is that, my old friend?” Skinner demanded, leaning into Alyn.

“He saw her first.”

“And she likes me better.”

“I didn’t hear her say so, and I saw her first. You back was turned.”

“All the women like me better, Skinner. Don’t you? What’s your name?”

“Please,” she shook like a leaf before winter. “I have to go back to work or I will be in terrible trouble.”

Damon stroked her cheek. “What kind of trouble? You’re a sweet little thing, prettiest girl I’ve seen since we landed on this bleak island, who would give you trouble?”

“They’ll strap me if I’m late. Please, let me go.”

“Don’t cry. No one will hurt my… what is it? Skinner. Skinner!”

“Fuck off.”

“What did you say they were called? Sugar girl…”

“I’m not helping you. Give her here, and I’ll help you with the next one.”

Alyn stood, leaving his food and taking his mug of mead.

“Alyn, where-” but Damon gave up when Alyn made a lewd gesture in his direction. “Fuck your job, sweetling. You’ll be my wife. Who would hurt you then?” She pulled away and her eyes grew fearfully. “Who me? Not much,” he laughed and kissed her neck. “Not often.”

“You can’t!”

“Oh, she’s a wiggly one, Skinner. She’ll be a fun fuck I bet. Try your luck with that old kettle-stirrer by the fire,” Damon laughed.

“Your master is taking me as his saltwife!”

Skinner dropped his spoon into his thick stew. “What, Ramsay?”

“What?” She looked around, blushing furiously. “No, Lord Theon.”

Skinner snorted. “Wha-at?” He started laughing into his napkin.

“Shut up!” Damon rasped.

“Oh, yeah, he’s sure to give you many beautiful babies.”

Damon suppressed a laugh. “I’ll talk to Lord Theon. Don’t fret.”

“She doesn’t like you.”

“She will.”

“If you had to choose-”

“Don’t do this to yourself.”

“Wouldn’t you like to sit with me instead? Look at the size of him, he’ll tear your cunt in two.”

“Charming.” Damon used his forefinger to turn her little chin his way. “I can be gentle.”

Skinner rose to lean over the table. His eyebrows arched sharply. “What do you think he uses that whip for?”

“Tell us, who is more handsome? Skinner won’t stop squawking until you deliver a judgment.”

“You are very handsome, Ser,” she whispered, apologetically glancing at the hard man looming so close.

“There you go. Never fear, there’s a willing lover for you yet.”

“Where?” Skinner stood to look around.

“Here.” Damon grabbed Skinner’s right hand and shook it, laughing.

“Goatfucker,” Skinner muttered and dropped back onto the bench. “She only said so because you’re have her and she’s afraid of you, you fucking freak.”

Damon pulled his nose out from her soft, perky breasts to glance sideways at his old friend. “What do you know about pleasing women? I can make her wet.” Damon kissed her tawny shoulder and followed her clavicle down as he slid his hand up her thigh.

“Ah!” She jumped but he held her.

“Ha ha! She’s so in love! You're not handsome nor charming, shit-wallowing knave. You’re big enough to take what you want though, I’ll grant you that.”

“Please,” Gwyn stuttered crying.

Damon looked from Skinner to the girl and back. “My sweet, … what is your name?”

“Gwynesse, Ser.”

“I’m no knight, my sweet Gywnesse. I would let you go if you would bring me more mead and return my adoration.”

Skinner grabbed his neck with both hands and mimicked gagging. Damon was going to tell him what he could choke on when his little bride took off running. “Aw, seven hells. Gwyn!” He bade Skinner follow and they both took off, running and laughing, calling the poor woman’s name as they chased her up the winding stairwell.

 

For some time Ramsay allowed his Reek to snuggle into him. It felt so good to have his pet wind around him, seeking his Master’s affection and protection. Kissing him head, gently grazing his teeth along his neck then biting gently and whispering, cooing, soothing. He heard Theon’s breath start to even out and decided to let him sleep. “Sweetling, only a small nap. We have much to do today, so much to discuss and do.” He murmured but then felt the body sag into his arms.  

He allowed himself to shut his eyes but not for sleep. Just to feel the sweet relief of knowing he found a safe way to end the fighting. Theon will comply, Ramsay’s apology was accepted and he didn’t hurt his Reek during the fight. Ramsay knew that he couldn’t always hope to run across a seagull any time his pet angered him. It was bound to happen again. Theon’s drinking was going to be an issue and Ramsay already could feel himself tensing over it. Taking some deep breaths, Ramsay caressed his sleeping boy and wondered how to protect him from both of them.

It took the hour that he allowed Theon to sleep before Ramsay came up with a good answer. He looked at his Reek and decided to let him sleep just a little bit longer. Sneaking carefully out of the bed and then the room, Ramsay went in search of the boys, he needed one of them to do a very important job. He saw Alyn eating by himself in a stairwell and sat heavily next to him. “And why are you eating out here like a common thrall?” Ramsay still said the word awkwardly not used to it. Alyn shrugged and said, “Wanted to eat and not have my stew tossed around because Damon and Skinner are fighting over some sugar girl.”  Ramsay chuckled and said, “Right now we have so few servants we can’t afford to hurt any of them. I want you to do me a favor, Alyn. You would leave right this second.” Alyn listened to the very explicit instructions, took the pouch Ramsay gave him and left. Only after Ramsay was sure that Alyn was gone from the keep did he go to wake up Reek. He had forgotten about the girl with Damon and Skinner, when she came running down the bridge towards him.

The girl screamed seeing him and leapt over Ramsay like a deer over a fallen tree. “My Lord!” She cried and burst into Ramsay’s chambers.

 

“Theon!”

He sat straight up reaching for the dagger that wasn’t there. “Gwyn?”

“Please!” She dove onto his bed and wrapped her strong arms around him. “Please take me as your bride! Tell your men to leave me be! They frighten me!”

“What? Wait, you should not-”

“I have an uncle who adores me! He has an island of naught but sugarcane where he-”

“Yes, but you must-” he grabbed her wrists and fought to push her off, but she was frantic.

“...distills the clear spiced rum I bring you. Marry me and he, he will send you a… enough to get a dragon drunk!”

“I will protect you,” he said slowly and firmly, waiting for her to calm down and get off him.

“Look! See how I love you! I found your flask for you.” She pulled it out of her cleavage. Theon swallowed when his eyes fell upon his silver flask emerging from two soft perfectly round, full breasts. They lifted slightly with the silver and his eyes bulged, hoping a nipple might peek out from the cream-colored lace.

“Oh,” he uttered. She was so warm on his lap, she must be much warmer inside. He licked his lips. “That, uh…” he shook his head and blinked. “First, get off-”

 

Ramsay stood in the doorway for a moment. At first he was simply amused by the desperate maid and flustered Reek. Then he caught sight of his pet’s eyes straying to her bosom and how Theon flushed when she was twisting on his lap. Trying to not look like a rabid dog nor a possessive fool, he went over to the bed.  “Sorry lovey, he already has a salt wife and a son, he is full up. However my boys are lonely and they are in need of salt wives. Why don’t you ask one of them since you are so keen on giving yourself to others?” His fingers curled around the girl’s arm and he yanked her off the bed. Snarling into her face, Ramsay asked, “Do you often run over and through others to throw yourselves at young sleeping Lords? I do hope you don’t get a strapping for being so very late. I’d run fast to get back to work, if I were you. Or run into one of the boys and you won’t have to be your King’s problem anymore.”

“Wait,” Theon stood smoothing his tunic. What could he say? _But, she’s mine_. “Tell Fat Merrick that I sent for you. If takes issue, tell him to come take it up with me.” Theon lowered his voice and came closer to her. “I’ll speak with the men.” He felt Ramsay’s eyes on his back and forced himself to add, with a light, airy smile, “Damon is not the monster he appears to be.” He shrugged and waved the girl away. Damon let her pass and watched her leave before going into the hallway. Theon collapsed onto a chair. His long fingers combed his hair. “Salt wives… what a mess.”

Ramsay made himself walk very slow, keeping his eyes pinned on his prey. _I won’t hit him, I won’t smack that smug look off his face._ He put his arms behind his back as he walked. Then he stood in front of Theon and felt the smirk pull at his face. He could hear his own soft tone and wanted to stop it but couldn’t. Ramsay consoled himself that it was only words, not hands that he was attacking with.  “It was so good of you, Lord Theon...or King if you’d prefer….so good of you to protect her from your men. It was so nice of you not to just take up her offer. You were very noble and I bet she barely noticed your raging fucking stiff cock! Did you get an excellent view of her breasts? Tell me, if I had not come in, would you have taken just a peek? Or would Theon Greyjoy take a hearty swig from his flask and fuck the whore right where you fuck me? Do you have any idea how easy it would be for me to hunt her down, make you watch as I rape and flay her living? If we were North, if you had ever dared this and I saw it….I would have done just that. What would Euron do, Theon? Hmm? Would he have her stripped and publicly whipped? Maybe leave her hanging there bloody by her wrists and let villagers do as they will? Or would he just slit her throat and force you to drink the blood till you puked?”

Ramsay panted for a moment, then gave a controlled smile to his Reek. “But I won’t do any of those things, Reek. I won’t touch a single hair on her sweet head. This time. I will allow you to speak with the Boys but I will not get involved no matter how they react. They already know not to ever lay a hand on you but I can’t promise that they won’t laugh in your face and rape her anyway. You are welcome to try, Lord Theon. But if you want fuck a girl, just have the balls to fucking tell me so. We can always try something new, pet. But if you ever do it behind my back...I honestly cannot promise how I will react.” Ramsay saw how much he was shaking and looming over Theon. He instantly moved to the other side of the room. “I..” He cut himself off knowing he should just shut up before he makes things worse. He just revealed that he is weak, that he wants his pet so badly that he would be willing to allow others into Reek’s bed.

“I’m sorry. I…” Theon lifted his head and peered through the hair falling around his face. “That’s far from the first time she has… I mean, I have had every opportunity to take a salt wife or twenty, or a rock wife, gods forbid. I haven’t.” Theon smirked sadly and shrugged a shoulder. He looked at his boots again, but he could feel his missing toes. “That one I have… shit, I don’t even remember her name. I took her long ago on my first voyage back her since Eddard Stark took me away. She told everyone her son was mine and I went along with it. She got me blackout drunk and said I made her with child again. I went along with that as well to give her something. I wasn’t… good to her before.” Theon held his head in one hand, letting his hair hide him. “I needed to look … like a man. Anyhow, I have not been with a woman. I… I don’t think anyone else could want me or understand. I have wondered, did my desires change or was I always…” he looked Ramsay in the eyes at last, “well, you know what I am. Heh,” he blushed, “I could only…” he cleared his throat, “with you… when you were bound, I could only because I thought,” his warm cheeks turned a darker shade of red and he tried to laugh like it didn’t matter. “I thought I was serving you. So,” he stood, eager to move on, “thank you for your patience… with me.”

Ramsay smirked and walked towards Reek without anger this time, but with some amusement. “Do you remember Grunt?” He put his arm around his pet and pulled him close so he could talk very close to that delicate ear.  “Do you know how he lost his tongue? Oh, I know there were so many rumors about that. Every single time a new person met him, we had to hear them listen to the stupid rumors all over again. Well, here is the real truth of the matter. My brother Domeric had some rather unusual interests. One day Grunt walked into the boy’s room and found my brother wearing his mother's dress. Not just wearing it, but jacking off into it. Do you know how I know it’s the real reason? Because I was the one who removed Grunt’s tongue. He told me first about what he had seen. Grunt knew I hated Domeric but I was smart enough to know better than to be anything but loyal. Outwardly at least. So I made sure to take Grunt’s tongue directly to my brother. I told him he had been seen but I quelled the rumor before it started. That won his loyalty to me and his trust in me. Also gave me the upper hand because I knew something he found so embarrassing. Grunt lost a tongue and Domeric lost his life to me all because both felt he had done something sexually strange. As if most men and women don’t have some sort of dark or different fantasies. You are not abnormal, you are not freakish or ugly or whatever else you tell yourself. Theon, how can you not see how others throw themselves at you? Do you really think a few missing toes or fingers would matter that much? As for what you are? Well, you are mine. You are something else though. You are a handsome man with immense power if only you’d see it. As for what we do...what you enjoy...what I enjoy, what is wrong with that? Theon, I let you top me and you enjoyed it as much as when I top you. So we like to dominate during sex? So I mainly prefer to dominate and you like to be submissive? Who cares, who dares to judge us? As for what I said, I meant it. Maybe we should have a girl for just one good fucking. Just so you can see that you are still a whole man. But it would only be once, I am not sure I could tolerate more than that.” Ramsay was terrified and vaguely excited about how Theon would react to his offer.  

Theon pressed into Ramsay, sucking at the bite healing on his lip. “Is it selfish that I don’t want to share you? I’m afraid she would, I don’t know,” he laughed awkwardly, “tempt you away. Maybe, if you think it’s best but, later, don’t you think? Maybe later when we feel more… stable. I only, I am already fucking everything up. I want,” he took Ramsay’s hand and and put it on his heart, then put his own hand on Ramsay’s, “this. I need my safe place to crawl. At least, until I feel stronger. Does that… I want to make you happy. What do you think?”

With a small growl, Ramsay licked the teeth scars on Theon’s neck then he smirked and grabbed a fistful of those curls. He pulled Reek’s head to his own neck and lifted the long hair in back. “Here, bite. Hard, make it bleed and scar. I want you to mark me like I have marked you. I own you and you own me too. There will never be another person for me but you. If we ever decide to try a woman together, it is your reaction I want to see, not hers. Besides, you do not have my  tastes when it comes to women...also you don’t have my violent reactions to sex with them.” Ramsay gave a tiny shrug and said, “See? Talk about sexual issues with women...I cannot just fuck a woman without hurting her, without some fear and pain. I was terrified that I would kill Sansa before I got her with child. Go on, Theon. Bite me, let the world see the marks and always know I am taken.”

Theon continued gaping, until a hungry grin crept upon his countenance. “Do you know what I told Asha when she asked how I survived you? She’s the only I gave an answer to. I told her, ‘I have a sickness that compliments his.’” Theon grinned at Ramsay, because they were sharing something more than a joke. Then he bit, and kept biting until the skin began to yield and break. The blood was bitter, richer than salt and iron. So this was his only other body and the only strange dark place in the world he ever belonged.

Wincing at the feel of sea worn leather against the fresh bite mark, Ramsay fixed his jacket collar. He looked into the mirror and nodded. “I don’t care for how it feels yet. But it certainly looks good. What do you think, sweetling?” Ramsay gave a twirl, then grinned at Theon.

“You always look handsome in black. That’s all he wears. Do you like how I shaved your beard? It makes your face even sharper, I think.” Theon swayed a little. He couldn’t remember when he started to see Ramsay as some kind of demigod, but it was around the time Ramsay collared him. Maybe that explained why he felt an inexcusable nauseous reverence for Ramsay while his skin crawled thinking about the uncle who had never even touched Theon, only looked like he would if the chance ever arose.

Ramsay grinned and grabbed his pet, yanking him close with a growl. “I am not actually Euron fucking Greyjoy. I normally love the mixed look of fear and lust from you, but I want to make sure you are feeling that for me, not for some dead uncle. No one will ever scare you...but me. And I love it when you shave me, you know that. Now get me that stupid eye patch. Let’s see how it looks on me.” He adjusted the eye patch for a few minutes until he felt it was correct. “I will have to get used to this.” He muttered, then turned to face Theon. “Well?”

Theon groaned with a seasick smile. “You really… gods, when you smile…” he grabbed his head. “Do you think he’s dead? I don’t know that anyone could come back from the North with those things…” He trailed off. His hands were shaking. There was so much to stop remembering. He almost asked if Ramsay had seen them, but it was better to forget. They were in a warm, place, high in a guarded stone tower alone. He looked at Ramsay. _He’s not afraid of anything._ “There’s one more,” he coughed, swallowing back bitter saliva, “... one more thing. He drinks… a poison and it makes his lips dark blue, kind of purple like deep bruises. You could just use blackberries or take some,” he tried his damnest not to smile, “whore’s makeup.”

Ramsay snorted then beckoned Theon to him. “Well, I am not taking poison. And I do not have any berries on me, now do I? Do you know any whores that can lend me some make up, little pet? Hmm?” His eyes and voice made the danger clear, as Ramsay walked behind his Reek and hugged him from behind. Then he let go of his pet to pull a small jar out of his pocket and quickly applied the grease to his lips then spun Theon around. “There! What do you think of my whorish lips? Good thing I had heard of the blue lips while I was in a nearby tavern that had plenty of whores willing to lend me their make up.” He leered at his pet with his greasy lips and waited for the reaction. “Well, can I pass or not? Will I make a good Euron or not?”

“Pass?” Theon backed away. “Yeah. Seven hells… I don’t know that his mutes would know better.” He was so nervous he started giggling at the absurdity of everything. “Though, if his crew does suspect you, they’re sure not to say anything.” Theon shook his head slowly. “If my poor uncle Aeron is still living somewhere, he’d be sure to turn from you shivering. Yes, it will work. Euron is, or perhaps _was_ , mercurial, sadistic, intelligent, always ten steps ahead of everyone, a happy madman no one would dare to cross. He likes his men to be entertained and his enemies humiliated. He can be theatrical, charming and always terrifying. You smile like him, with the same ease, the same laughter and malice. I think… you only have to be yourself now.”

Theon looked to his bed, catching sight of the flask he so needed to taste, but how to ask? He rubbed his dizzy head. “I think I made a mistake, wanting the tower free of guards so I could wander as I wanted. Would it make more sense now to keep that bridge closed off to all but you, I and your men? We cannot have someone worse than a serving girl running in here at a worse time than a morning nap. And… if you will only be Ramsay in this tower,” he bit his lip, “I would only be Reek.” _So please take that off._

Ramsay saw the fear in Reek’s face and took off the patch. “Who am I?” He pulled Theon close. “I am Master, I am Ramsay, I am yours. These are just clothes, it’s just a costume.” He wiped off the grease on his lips and dragged his boy close to kiss him. “It is only your Master. And yes, we will exclude all but us and the boys from the tower. Now help me out of this, would you?” As he started to try and remove the constrictive clothing, a knock sounded. “It’s us.” Called Damon and Ramsay smirked at Reek. “Come in, boys!”

The three filed in, all somewhat miserable about their new clothing. “It is so stiff and fucking cracks when I move.” Complained Alyn as he kept trying to twist to loosen the tunic. Ramsay laughed at them, as if he wasn’t just as uncomfortable in his own new clothing. “Hey, at least you don’t have to wear a patch and have blue lips.” Ramsay offered. Then with a malicious grin Ramsay gave Theon a slight push forward. “Theon? Do their outfits look right to you?” Barely waiting for Reek to have a chance to respond he called out, “Oh yes, I almost forgot! Boys, Theon wishes to speak with you all about something. Go on, Theon. Tell them.” Ramsay leaned against the wall and grinned. “Go on, Theon. It is very important and I must not stand in the way of the King. Speak with the men.”

Theon stared at Ramsay in disbelief. “Oh…” he turned to the Boys, dressed as Euron’s dreaded freaks. Silence had haunted his dreams before he knew what a Stark or Bolton was. Mayhaps his uncle was no more a monster than Ramsay, but things loom large through a child’s eyes.

Damon smiled down on him, already thinking this was hilarious. “How can I please my lord?”

Theon looked back at Ramsay for help, but none was offered. “Well... no need to discuss it now, really.”

“Oh, we may well. Why wait. We’re all here?” Skinner said, happily.

Theon tried to stand at his full height. “You cannot grope and rape your way around the islands. Our position here is still tenuous and we do not know how many people we have standing behind us so it is vital-”

“Who are they standing behind?” Alyn interrupted. He looked around confused. “Your sister is dead, right? And no one cared about her anyway, is what I heard.” Alyn shrugged a shoulder. “So…” when Theon didn’t seem to understand, Alyn patiently explained, “There’s you and there is Euron. Get it?”

“Your miserable people are happily united.” Damon said, in a congratulatory manner.

“Well, that remains to be seen, but-”

“And we’re supposed to act like fucking pirates, so what is the issue?”

“Well, I don’t want you-”

“Why do we give a rotting pig’s shit what you want?” Skinner hissed coming closer. “I care what Ramsay wants. He is the true lord here, do you think we have forgotten, Reek?”

“Are we listening to him?” Alyn pointed to Theon and quirked an eyebrow at Ramsay. “I thought we only listened to him if he was telling us something you said.”

Theon looked around at the boys, closing in and back to Ramsay, pleading silently.

“What do want to tell me about my little sugar girl?” Damon asked benevolently.

“Salt wife,” Theon corrected.

“What? I could not hear you?”

“It’s, nevermind.”

“What? Surely, you have no qualms with my taking her? Do you?”

“She is a sweet and innocent girl. You… this isn’t the vast North. You have to… you’ll make a fast and lasting impression here.”

“But the Ironborn understand pirates.” Alyn said flatly. “This is our type of place, Reek.”

“Alyn’s right.” Skinner determined. “We don’t have to play Roose Bolton’s games, walking on eggshells for a quiet, happy people, bending over for the Starks, then sucking Lannister cock. They say every man with a boat is a king here. Fuck, we belong here more than you do, Reek.” Skinner got close enough to smell Theon’s sea salt and oils. “I still remember what your insides look like, dog.”

Theon stepped back, towards Ramsay.

“What did you do with your collar? Ben made it just for you. I hope you kept it close. It was made with very special leather.”

Damon yanked Skinner back by his shoulder. “What is past is done. We will protect and keep you, Theon, and we will head Ramsay. I promise to be gentle with my little Gwyn. Is that all?”

Theon looked back to Ramsay one last time, then up at Damon. His hand rested on the handle of the whip coiled at his hip. Theon nodded.

Ramsay stood straight then and said very mildly, “Skinner? One last thing before you all go. In front of us all, you are going to apologize for threatening Lord Theon.” He stared at Skinner and waited for the outburst.

“Oh, what the fuck? Piss on that! I will not apologize to your bitch! What game are you playing at?! You can be a pirate, hells, you can be a princess before he can be a man!”

Ramsay threw the knife before Skinner ever saw it coming. As the blade landed into Skinner’s shoulder, Ramsay flew forward to punch Skinner in the gut. “WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TALKING TO? DO YOU WANT TO BE MY NEW CLOAK? HOW ABOUT MY NEW PIRATE FLAG, YOU WANT THAT?” Ramsay pulled Skinner towards Theon. “You will say you are sorry for threatening him. You will say it to Lord Theon Greyjoy, King of the Iron Islands. Theon is not my bitch. He is a man in every sense of the word. So he may be a timid man, but still a man. And Skinner, if you do not apologize, I swear I will be flaying you until you do.”

“You are fucking mad!” Skinner bellowed, but tears stung his wide eyes. “What’s the game, Ramsay?” he asked, begging. “You cannot mean this. I don’t understand! You want me… I’m your Boy! That creature is just your pet. I would never hurt him without your leave! You know that! What is this jape?”

Ramsay sighed and turned Skinner to face him. “This is not a game, Skinner. Listen to me carefully. We cannot be like we were in the North. We are new here, all of us, him included. The past is gone, it is over. You reminded Theon of what he went through at your hands at Dreadfort. That is threatening to him. It scares him and makes Theon think you will hurt him. It isn’t allowed. Because this isn’t a creature, this is a man. He is a Lord, he is going to learn to be a king and this is a nice easy slow way for your mind to begin to accept that. Theon or Reek, it doesn’t matter for you. Because I am telling my Boy that treating MY most beloved Theon in a threatening manner is never allowed. You have always taken things too far, Skinner. It will never happen again, not with Theon. So. You alone will begin only calling Theon by his given name in private or My Lord. And you will apologize for the threat. Damon and Alyn can learn from the example.” Ramsay had flashed a grin at Damon but gave Alyn a stern look. Not that Alyn has ever done more than ordered with Reek but just in case.

Skinner was quaking under the strain of remaining composed. He already felt lightheaded and his shirt was soaked at the shoulder. “Everything truly did change,” he finally admitted. “I apologize, Lord Theon, King of the Iron Islands.” He sulked but stole a glance at Ramsay, desperate for some approval. Closer friends had been cast out for less.

Pulling from memories so long ago, Ramsay gave Skinner the same smile he gave him that first time he declared him one of his Boys. “Thank you, Skinner. I am glad you can change along with the rest of us. I need you, I have always depended on your skills. You are one of my Boys and that means something to me. We shall consider this all sorted out and move on. Alyn, see that Skinner gets to a maester right away. Damon, please stay for a moment.”  Ramsay watched as Skinner allowed Alyn to take some of his weight. He was no longer in tears, but now was morose and hurting. At least Skinner will understand not to mess with Reek anymore. Ramsay watched as Damon shut the door for the Boys.

Damon came strolling back. A guileless smile danced in his eyes. “What would you ask of me?”

Ramsay smiled and walked over to Damon then his eyes went flat. “Because you are not just my Boy but my friend, I waited for privacy. If you ever dare to touch your whip to threaten Theon again, we will have a problem. Do you understand? You can apologize to him too. Be thankful that I sent Skinner and Alyn away first.”

Damon smirked bashfully and scratched at the back of his head. He leaned down to look Theon in the eye. “I’m sorry, little brother. I’m sorry I scared your Gwyn as well. I’m not going to hurt you or the girl, I simply get overzealous. We must learn to save our darker nature for our enemies.”

Theon looked to Ramsay then back to Damon. He reflected Damon’s shy smile. “Thank you, and thank you for earlier.”

Damon stood grinning.

Ramsay gave an inward sigh of relief and then clapped his hands loudly. “Well, that is over with. Of course, since we are in private I do want to say a little more. Skinner was Alyn’s first example, I want you to be his second one. The one that will matter.  I would never ask you or Alyn to change your nature. I am sure that Theon can survive being called names and general teasing from you both. Just be aware that you are speaking to a Lord, your Lord and king actually. And if he decides to retaliate or he feels you have become too disrespectful, consider that Theon could order you to a cell.” Ramsay smirked as he said that, he and Damon both know his pet would never do such a thing. But Theon could very well seek ways to punish them, more so once he starts to understand his power and worth. Ramsay doesn’t ever want to be caught between loyalty to his Boys and to Theon. “Take care that if you see any signs of Skinner crossing that line you pounce on him. Understand?”

“I understand.” Damon nodded. “He is the one to worry about. I’ll keep an eye on him and you.” Damon winked at Ramsay and left laughing.

“I guess at supper, Euron will make his appearance?” Theon rubbed his mouth and sighed. _And how will that go?_


	15. I Will Hurt Everyone To Hold You

Theon poked at the pink buttered salmon Gwyn had laid before him. It was his favorite fish, and he should be hungry but it was hard to find that appetite. He always hated sitting at the dias and eating in his father’s great hall, but it was worse now that the dias was empty and a nightmare was about to burst in. At least he didn’t have to talk to anyone.

Gwyn came back around serving bread and stew. “Ale, Your Grace?” She was frantic to make him happy.

He smiled with pressed lips. “Thank you.” He looked to the looming entrance doors across the hall. “Make it _the way I like it_.” He winked. He would need it.

“Of course!” He avoided looking at her chest when she curtsied, suddenly finding the ceiling quite interesting. Theon broke his bread into smaller and smaller pieces and stirred his stew until she came back with his drink. That he was happy to have. He hadn’t finished downing it when the doors slammed open and his heart dropped into his stomach. He raised his mug to Gwynesse and shook it before dropping it on the long table and steadying himself. _He’s going to love this._

Ramsay was Euron in his mind and that translated into his body as he stormed forward with a leering smirk. “Nephew! Or should I say King now, eh? This is a poor welcome home feast for your Uncle Euron but what can I expect? Food, ale! Let us celebrate my return and I shall tell you tales of the dead!” He grinned fiercely at Theon as he moved towards the dias. Taking time to glare at any that didn’t seem quite cowed and amazed enough.

Theon stood and stumbled back. He wasn’t certain he was acting. “What… I…” he looked around as if for help. Good thing it wasn’t Euron, he supposed, _No one here will lift a finger for me_. Ramsay was right, he was probably in more danger than he knew. He couldn’t stop his hand from shaking. _It’s only a game._

“Uncle? I would never have thought to see you again. I heard rumors of you’re passing, burned by dragons they said,” he gasped trying not to let his voice rise to high pitches. “Please,” he motioned for Fat Merrick, the head chef, to serve his ‘unexpected’ guests, “sit. We’ll make you a place of honor and fed your men.” Theon leaned over the dias and waved some men away from the front table. They scrambled, knocking each other over to make way.

Ramsay grinned widely then walked over to his “nephew” and gave him a fast hard hug. He whispered, “You are doing just fine. I am doing this to protect you, remember?” He dragged a chair close and sat next to Theon, pulling him into his own chair. He watched with amusement as his Boys scared away every person near them. The thralls shook at the prospect of serving them. “Well, clearly I wasn’t eaten by dragons, though that might be the way to go. How glorious an ending would that be?” Ramsay’s one eye twinkled at Theon as he continued loudly.

”I found myself in the frigid North fighting dead men, women and children. I barely made it out alive, these men were the only survivors besides myself. We have lost everything and came home to regroup. Yet then I hear the wonderful news that my nephew is home safe and sound! In spite of your asshole of a father, in spite of the others you have survived. The tales I heard of your bravery impressed me, Theon. I have decided to throw you my full support, Theon. You were always my favorite as you know. This is our chance to get closer again, nephew. Maybe we shall become even closer than before.”

A teasing grin to let Theon know he was enjoying his discomfort. Then he stood with Theon’s confiscated mug and raised it. “Let it be known that Euron Greyjoy protects his King! I will see his rule enforced! We shall see the Iron Islands become a legend through his reign.”  

All seemed to lean forward, holding their breath, waiting for Theon’s response. He stood and grabbed the back of his chair to keep steady. He snapped at a serving thrall who ran to bring a mug of ale. “We will toast to your return.” Theon slipped his mug out of Ramsay’s hand and graciously offered the one the trembling boy held. All the men stood holding mugs and glasses. They love him already.

Theon smiled. “Once there was a Rock King to stay at the islands and see them run smoothly, and a Salt King who commanded the fleets and protected our people. When have we ever needed more protection? Who better to fight our enemies?” Theon forgot himself a moment. “Did you really see them?” he asked Ramsay. “I saw them as well. Nothing can take them down but fire. I saw an arrow go through one’s eye, yet still he kept coming. Aye, children too, just as you say! Asha didn’t believe me…” he remembered himself and looked around. Clearing his throat, he raised his mug high, “Let us rule together then, and combine our strengths to restore our Islands to greatness,” he turned to Ramsay, “if it pleases you?”

Ramsay smiled and raised his mug. “To our combined talents at restoring the Islands!” He drank deeply and watched Theon do the same before sitting back down. Leaning closer, as if trying to have some private chat with a fond nephew, Ramsay whispered, “No more. I know you are drinking something a tad stronger, dearest. I know you are nervous but you are doing just fine. I will let you have another mug of it in a little while. But enough for now, hear me?” Ramsay stood up and began to circulate a little, to meet, impress and intimidate where needed.

Theon pushed the mug of rum away. Some were still cheering, all seemed eager to make a good impression or run away. He did relax a bit seeing the hall so enthralled with Ramsay. That wasn’t so bad.

“What about your sister?” Theon scanned the room and found a young broad man with a wooden leg standing on a table, pointed accusingly at him.

“What? Who are you?”

“Asha would believe your stories now. She sent word to you of our wreck on the northern shore. Many of our men were killed by those things and no one came. She may be living still.” He shook his head as though he didn’t believe his own hopes. “When will you go to save her as she saved you?”

She didn’t, but she did try. Theon stood. “Where? I received no word about this! Where is she?” he demanded.

“I last saw her at Flint’s Cliffs. I do not know where she may be now. I was picked up by slavers. I pray she wasn’t. Would that bother you, my king? Would you care if your sister was working in a brothel? I heard you never had to pay.” The man crossed his arms and spit.

“What?” Theon felt he was spinning.

Ramsay wanted to slay the man right there but instead he just slowly started walking towards him. “Are you challenging your King? Asha Greyjoy has sent no word, that is what you were just told...do you call him a liar? Would you like to say that to my face?”

The man stepped back, almost losing his balance. The looked at the Boys closing in around him and the terrifying madman in front of his face. “Well? So you know now then! Renounce your claim and go save your sister.”

The man looked around the frozen hall and again pointed to Theon. “He didn’t kill the Bastard of Bolton who flayed our men and ate their flesh! He’s admitted as much himself! Asha Greyjoy, your true queen, did it herself! She told me how she stabbed the monster in the depths of his kennels and let his hunting bitches burn to death.” He swayed and guffawed, clearly drunk. “She told me lots of things about what really happened. You may want to call back your mad uncle unless you would have the whole hall hear.”

Ramsay grinned and blocked Theon’s view of this vile person. “Really? Asha told you that she stabbed Ramsay to death? Impressive. So you ARE calling your King a liar. Now you are saying that he lied about killing the infamous Ramsay Bolton. You have an impressive tongue, Sir. For a rambling drunk. If Asha sent word, we would send help, but she has not. I think you have had too much to drink, or maybe just not enough.” Gesturing to his boys to grab and hold the man, Ramsay pinched the struggling man’s nose shut with one hand, then began forcing drink down the man’s throat till he choked on it. “Not quite enough yet. Bring me a barrel of wine to stick his head into!”

Theon stood spinning. Men were standing on their chairs to get a better view.

When Damon and Skinner brought the barrel of wine men cheered as Ramsay theatrically shoved the man’s head into the barrel. He let the man thrash before lifting him back out to cough and sputter. “I will tolerate no disrespect to my King. Do you all agree that our King deserves more respect than this drunken cur can show?” Ramsay asked and listened to the men all roar their assent. Ramsay thrust the man back under the wine and this time continued until the man was drowned. Letting the body slump to the floor, Ramsay sauntered back to the dais to sit down. “Have someone get rid of that trash!” He called back over his shoulder.

Theon stood gripping his chair with bulging knuckles. His eyes slowly rolled around, surveying the merriment. “Harlaws,” he barked suddenly, looking to their table. “Cousins, will you sail with me? I mean to bring my sister home, to heal or to lay rest at sea.”

Harras stood. “Aye, I’ll sail with you.”

“We shall take my Sea Bitch and sail at dawn.”

Ramsay arched a brow at Theon and then said, “Do not be so hasty to waste resources uselessly, nephew. You cannot afford to send men away and you cannot leave here. It is not safe. If your sister were alive and needed you, you would know of it. There will be no sailing unless we hear from her.” He made sure to say this loud enough for all to hear.

“I will only take my cousins. Asha came for me when I was presumed dead.” He watched his cousins stand to join him. “Now that you’ve returned, there is no real danger in my leaving. What perfect timing, the Drowned God must have sent you.” He turned to the hall and entreated upon them. “Is that not a sign?” Still gripping the chair as though it were in danger of running, he turned to Ramsay. “I will return shortly. In less than a fortnight, I swear it.”

Ramsay shook his head slowly and stood up in perfect imitation of Euron, but he made sure Theon saw Master in his one eyed glare. “No. As your Uncle, as your adviser and protector, I am telling you no. It is a waste of resources if you do not know if she still lives. We have only the word of a drunk man who held a grudge against you that she is alive! If and when you hear from her, then I as her uncle shall go get her personally. Until then, it is not going to happen.”

“You can command any man or woman here but I.” Theon’s nerve wavered and guilt began to choke him when Ramsay looked so displeased. Still, he tried in a softer, more respectful tone. “ _I have to_. It is both my right and my duty. We will only take weeks if you insist, but I must try.”

Ramsay gave his pet a charming smile and spoke with a smooth, overly polite tone that he knew Reek would remember well. “That is true, it is your right. If Asha ever sends word, it is your right to try and rescue her. And I cannot command you, my King. I can only try to persuade you. Alyn? Bring me the boy, please.” Ramsay sat back down in his chair and began to twirl his knife between his fingers. “Now, my King...dearest nephew, you are very precious to me, to all of us. We simply cannot risk your life, nor would we ever dare raise a hand to you. But I hope this will help you understand the lengths I am willing to go for your own safety.”

Alyn came in dragging the terrified boy and Ramsay spoke a bit softer to Theon. “Now you do understand the concept of whipping boy, don’t you? I think you were the Stark’s whipping boy but probably not in such a painful way. Now, we have Damon who would use his whip, Alyn would use his feet and fists or a club and Skinner will use his knife. Now I will let you choose which one will administer a punishment upon him. And that punishment will continue until you are persuaded to agree with me not to sail for Asha until we hear from her.”

Theon looked from face to face and found help in none. He entertained the idea of calling for guards to stop them, but that would lead to nothing but strife no matter how things ended, so he sat at last. His face was hot and he was shrinking. “There is no need to scare the child. I will stay. Leave him go.” His cousins sat and seemed relieved to do so. Theon lowered his voice, staring dully at his mug. “He’s not supposed to be here. Where is my wife?”

Ramsay smirked and said, “Your wife and little family are perfectly safe as are your doggies. They have been sent to Braavos with a sizable purse to aid them for years if she is clever about it. How could you ever think I would hurt your little pets, Theon? As for Severin, he will stay here as your whipping boy. And you will choose one of the Boys, I was not making an idle threat. I only say no once, if you make me repeat myself, the boy pays for it. You made me repeat myself. I suggest picking Damon, he would go the easiest. Alyn has been far too bored and you know how much Skinner hates you.”  Ramsay stared challengingly at Theon and then said, “Pick a boy and I will let it happen privately in our chamber instead of here in front of all. They can just think the matter is settled.” Ramsay leaned back in his chair, satisfied with how reasonable he was being with his pet.

Theon’s chest started heaving. Red splotches crawled from his neck up to his cheeks. He looked to Ramsay to see if might trying pleading, but was afraid that would makes things worse. “Damon,” he rasped. He couldn’t bare to see how people may be looking at him so held his head and pulled his mug back.

Ramsay nodded and said in a very soothing voice, “Good answer. You may now have another refill of your mug. After you finish it we shall retire, understand?” Theon nodded. Leaning to glance at Damon Ramsay beckoned him over. “Have the boy waiting in our chamber. Theon has chosen you to administer the punishment. Wait for us, Theon needs to watch.”  

Theon panted through gritted teeth. His eyes bore into his mug, tracing the grain, finding no direction on meaning. “You’re going to hold the boy hostage to my good behavior? Well,” he grinned bitterly and took a long draught, “how like my Lord father I have become.”

“It is not for everything, Theon. Only when you force my hand on very big issues such as this one. You need to learn to trust me with your safety. Finish your drink and let’s go. Delaying is only giving the boy more time to fear what may happen.”

Theon lowered his head. With a sigh, he gathered what courage he had left and downed the rest of his rum. As he left he saw some whisper and snigger, some of the women looked at him with concern. Everyone stood when Ramsay did. As he followed Theon out they started cheering Euron’s name.

He shrugged away from Ramsay’s touch and remained silent until they crossed the long bridge into his tower, or was it Ramsay’s now?

 

Theon sat at the foot of his bed staring at the fire through blurry eyes. “Please don’t do this.”

Ramsay lifted his pet’s face with a gentle hand and said softly, “Don’t you understand that I have to, pet? It's the only way I can be sure that you won’t dare to get the idea to defy me on this.  Short of injuring you personally, I cannot be sure you will understand I mean what I say on this subject. It will be only three strikes and I will make sure Damon holds back some. The boy will otherwise be treated well in a room nearby. He will want for nothing and you can even visit with him as much as you would like. But when you just refuse to listen to good sense, this is what will have to happen. I know you are going to be very angry with me, Theon. I am sorry for that but I won’t risk hurting you and I won’t risk you hurting yourself.” He let go of his pet’s face and called Damon in with the boy. “Only three strikes on his bare back. Do not cause a need for stitches if you can help it, Damon.”

“Please don’t do this! Injure me then! Punish me instead! He’s just a boy.” Theon lept off the bed and wrapped his arms around Ramsay’s waist. He leaned in to whisper. “You can do it yourself,” he ran a hand down the bare chest his uncle’s billowing black shirt exposed. “I can make it up to you. I’ll show you I am sincere. Please?”

Ramsay smiled down at his Reek and sighed. “Why am I such a merciful person to you? I will allow you to show your gratitude and how sincere you are...but Severin will receive two lashes. No more arguing against it, Reek or it goes back up to three.” Ramsay warned. He nodded to Damon and then pulled Theon against him and held his arms down tightly. “Watch and remain quiet, pet. Be a good boy for Master and it will be over fast, I promise.” Ramsay told Damon it was two lashes now and to start.

“Your Grace, please!” Severin cried, but he wasn’t looking to Ramsay.

“I’m sorry.” Theon sank to his knees.

“Hold him,” Damon snapped.

“Why? Why don’t you stop them?”

“I… I can’t.” Theon looked away as Damon’s whip unfurled but he could hide from the noise.

Severin screamed at the first crack and started weeping at the second. Theon found his nose on the floor and his hands covering the back of his head.

Ramsay walked over to the weeping thrall and crouched before him. “Now, look at me and listen. Your King Theon likes you very much. He thinks of you as his own child almost. So whenever the King has done something that he cannot be excused from, you will have to suffer for it. As long as my beloved boy is not trying to sail away or do something equally as stupid, you will lead the best life of any thrall. You have no chores any longer. You will have whatever sort of life that your King wants for you. But you will always be nearby if I have need of you. And the boys are always going to have an eye on you in case you ever dare think of running. Damon, bring the boy to the Maester and then tuck him in. He may have milk of the poppy for his pains, I am sure that his King would want it for him.”

Theon groaned onto the floor. He felt made of lead. It was a relief when the poor child was taken away but then the door closed and they were alone.

Ramsay knelt down next to Reek and tried to pull him into his lap. “Hush, I know that was very hard for you, poor boy. I am so sorry that I had to do it.  I don’t want to hurt you anymore, Reek. I really don’t and I am trying so hard to keep you safe from all harm. Even from yourself which is just as hard, harder than keeping me from hurting you. Let’s go lay on the bed, sweetling. Do you need me to carry you? Let Master help you, pet.”  Ramsay used his special voice, the one that melts and started to carry his boy across the room to the bed.

“Do you know how much I love you? How much I want to make you my King and still have my lovely pet all at once? I could strip you down and chain you naked against the Seastone Chair and no one would ever stop me, Reek. I could have openly let all three boys beat and torture Severin while you wept at my feet and no one would dare say a word out loud. But I don't’ do these things, Theon. Because I love you so much that I am willing to act the lovesick fool and bend over backwards to keep your sainted image. I don’t do these things because I know how much it hurts you for that boy to be injured. Because I care enough to show mercy for you. Do you really understand how much I care for you? I know you are angry, Theon but you did make a promise, didn’t you? To show me how grateful you are for my mercy towards Severin? To show me that you sincerely will never try to leave for Asha without my permission?” He laid his boy on the bed and then sat down next to him. “I am waiting, my Reek.”

Theon whined and wondered, perhaps for the millionth time, if Ramsay didn’t understand what he had done, or if he just didn’t care. He was right though, again, about everything. He always was, another trait he shared with Euron. “Please take that eyepatch off first.”

Ramsay ripped off the eye patch and tossed it across the room. “All gone, my sweet boy. I forgot how much it bothers you, love.” He started to remove everything he wore that was to be part of Euron Greyjoy. “Here, is this better love? Now come here and do as you promised you would. I want to see only my Reek right now, not fucking Theon Greyjoy if you please.” Ramsay commanded airily but with a slight sense of unease. He really didn’t want Theon to interfere right now. Ramsay didn’t want to hurt the boy nor Reek further this evening unless forced to. “Come now, are you sulking, pet?” Trying for gentle teasing to hopefully ease the tension.

Ramsay had not forgotten the promise he made in haste. Too late to retract it now. Theon’s shoulders slumped and began to untie his jerkin. Part of him was ready to fall on his knees and please Ramsay, the part Ramsay loved and would call Reek. Theon unbuckled his belt and pulled his light tunic up over his head.

Ramsay was very skilled at training. The first time he had begged to please Ramsay in hopes of avoiding more pain, years ago at the Dreadfort, he was immediately rewarded. The pain stopped. The razor’s edge in his voice turned to warm caramel. Quickly and repeatedly Theon learned to melt for certain tones and phrases. He grew to take a sickening comfort just getting on his knees and taking Ramsay into his mouth because it meant an end to suffering. It was better than a promise.

Sweet words and kind caresses came, he could look forward to sleeping at the foot of his Master’s bed or even in it. He only had to sacrifice what he felt was his remaining pride and honor. He had to start living with this new self he hated, who needed the comfort, who felt like he was suckling… Theon didn’t have to go back. Not all the way.

Theon, for that was the name he emblazed on his heart, grabbed Ramsay and pulled him, twisting onto the bed so that Ramsay fell onto his back. He felt like Ramsay was humoring him, from the indulgent smile on his face. It made Theon crazy. It’s not fair that Ramsay is faster and stronger. It’s not fair that Ramsay is more clever and cruel. It’s not fair that Ramsay inspired this terrible desire in him and made Theon love him. _It was a trick, his greatest trick_ , Theon lied to himself. He bit his lip running his hands down Ramsay’s broad chest. He was so handsome now, another trick! Theon almost laughed. He pulled Ramsay’s britches down and off. _I still have this one thing at my disposal._ He looked down on Ramsay with all the adoration he couldn’t fight, and tried to flip him over.

“Are you going to get some revenge, Theon? Very well, go on, do your worst.” Ramsay turned over for his pet and laid his head on the pillow staring at the fire. Reek needed this right now, he needed to try and hurt Ramsay. That was fine, truth be told, Ramsay didn’t mind his little Reek taking him. Reek had taken his punishment so well, had given in so sweetly once he understood. So he felt warm and lenient towards his boy, lying passively.

Theon kissed up his spine. “You’re skin is so beautiful. It looks so pure.” Another trick. He kissed and sucked hungrily where Ramsay’s neck met his shoulder. His tongue ran along the wound he’d made. “I want to tie you up again,” he whispered in Ramsay’s ear. He sat up and reached for his belt then took Ramsay’s wrist.

Snorting, Ramsay said, “I hope you understand this cannot become an everyday thing. Yes, Theon, you can tie me up.” He relaxed his body and allowed Theon to restrain him to the headboard. Stretching his length upon the mattress, Ramsay rubbed his foot along Theon’s leg and waited. “I am all yours, pet. Do as you will, my love.” He encouraged with a leer.

Theon hesitated a moment, remembering Ramsay’s hurt and terrified reaction before. He had said something about his father… “Thank you,” Theon kissed his cheek. “If… if you don’t like it… tell me to stop. Please? I don’t… I want you to love it.” He grinned and bit his lip.

He lowered his voice and kissed Ramsay’s little pointed ear, along with his effervescent eyes and sharp canines, he truly did seem something other than human. Theon growled and bit the back of Ramsay’s thick neck, pushing him down into the mattress. He took Ramsay’s belt off the floor and folded it in half, keeping the buckle in the palm of his hand. “Do you want me gag you, Master?”

 

Ramsay thought about it and nodded. “Yes.” He wouldn’t give his pet the satisfaction of begging or screaming if he was after that. Theon stoked the fire and locked the door. He set the oil on the nightstand and stroked Ramsay’s thick hair. He grabbed a handful, close to the scalp, and pulled back. “You humiliated me in front of my men tonight. You made me look like a fucking child.” He dropped Ramsay’s head and leaned down. “But you’re the child, aren’t you?” he snapped. “You always will be.” Ramsay was actually shocked and felt a little hurt at what Reek said. Then the anger hit but there was nowhere for it to go.

 

The first hit cracked against Ramsay’s back just his shoulder blades. He took care to avoid the small of his back, where his spine was most vulnerable, but struck again, harder, below the first stripe. The third was in between the first two. There, three. How merciful.

The point was not lost at all on Ramsay, who was not aware of how fucking HARD Theon could hit. Fuck, that hurt and he couldn’t help the pained grunt with each strike.

 

“My Lord,” Theon purred, “pink looks so lovely on your white skin.” He moved to Ramsay’s ass, staying low, away from the tailbone. His body remembered all the worst spots to hit and the best. He watched stripe after stripe move down to that sweet place by the thighs. When his ass was a deep red, Theon threw the belt across the room. “You don’t bruise easily,” he pouted and then bit into the swelling right side. “There. The palate wanted for blue and purple.” He crawled up over Ramsay’s back. His hard dick poked Ramsay’s spine as he leaned to snatch the bottle off the nightstand. “Now I’ll take care of you.”

Ramsay’s head was spinning and the pain has caused him to go rock hard and he moaned. _Oh, Reek, I am so very glad for your sake that I am restrained and gagged. If I wasn’t, I’d beg you to fuck me then carve your ears off for hearing it._ Groaning, Ramsay tried to push himself towards his pet then forced himself to stop.

He pulled Ramsay’s hips up and pushed his lower back down. He oiled his dick and used his slick hand to slowly pump Ramsay. “Mmm, you did like it. Good. I want you to.” Theon slid his cock slowly back and forth, down against Ramsay without yet entering, keeping pace with his hand. “You're mine. I am yours but you are mine as well.”

Theon entered Ramsay then waited for him relax. He started thrusting slowly, gently. He stopped a moment and whispered, “Are you alright?”

Ramsay wanted to scream _NO I AM NOT! I AM IN PAIN, I AM GOING TO DIE IF YOU DON’T FUCK ME HARD, DON’T ASK STUPID FUCKING QUESTIONS!_ He nodded and gave a small whimper, the closest he can come to begging. He bit hard onto the gag and urged Reek silently.  

Theon waited until he felt Ramsay pulse, pumping, and shrink in his hand before he allowed himself relief. He pulled out and came on the red stripes he'd made. He collapsed next to Ramsay and held him. He kissed the little pointy ear and down the cheekbone then he fell onto his back and started crying. He didn't know why exactly, and didn't care to think of reasons. He rolled away, hiding his face . “I’m sorry. I love you.”

When he felt more in control of himself, Theon wiped his face with the cloth beside his basin and released Ramsay from his restraints. “I knew she wouldn’t come back before she even left.” He put his head to Ramsay’s chest. “If she is alive and does send for help, you’ll let me go?”

Ramsay had been glad that Reek had taken time before releasing him. His heart had been galloping and his control had been shattered. He loved the feelings during the session but hated the feeling directly afterwards. Now his Reek was back in place, Ramsay was centered again.

Without any hesitation, Ramsay replied, “Yes, if she is alive and sends for help, I will go with you to retrieve her. But I will  never let you go...not anywhere without me. Not ever again, Theon...I meant that. I would never feel you were safe without me there to protect you. I would be afraid of losing you. It is the only thing I am afraid of, sweet pet. And you know how some folks react to fear. Some of us strike harshly at things we fear. You want to remember that, Reek.”

With a teasing tone, Ramsay nuzzled Reek’s head. “On the good side of things, you have a little pet of your own now. You can dress your thrall like a little lordling and send him to tutors. Or have Damon’s sugar girl fill the boy up with sweets and read little stories to him while he grows soft and round.”

Theon studied Ramsay like a riddle. “You… you truly are trying to be kind,” he murmured in disbelief. Then he smiled warmly. He climbed over Ramsay and leaned close to watch his face. “You don't look at me any differently. Don’t you feel… different?”

Ramsay arched his eyebrow and looked up at his little pet with a smirk. “Feel different how? I don’t feel like anything but me. I feel happy that we had a good resolution, a bad fight perhaps, but a good make up for it, don’t you think, sweet pet? Of course I want to be kind to you, Reek. I love you. We will learn more about each other as we go, love. I am not going to let you do this to me all the time. I do not mind letting you take some control during sex, Theon. And those welts hurt like fire, I should make you rub ointment into them. Come here to me, sweet boy. My boy. So yes, I feel different. I feel my entire backside hurting and I am feeling more confident about us dealing with arguments.” Ramsay bit Reek’s lip playfully and then grinned at him. “I do enjoy the make up part of our fights, don’t you?”

“Yes,” Theon smiled, pursing his lips. “What are you, truly? You’re too… much to simply be human. You're like a fire. I don't understand. I sometimes thought you were the only God who ever heard me,” he laughed nervously and pushed hair away from his face.

Ramsay grabbed Reek by his throat but didn’t squeeze but the threat was there. “What am I? Your monster, remember? I am your monster and you are my pet. I will be your God if you want.” Ramsay pulled his boy closer and began to lick and nip at his soft fragile skin. His tongue licked along Reek’s pulse then his teeth bit down as if trying to find that pulse, as if it were a small piece of candy he could just roll about his mouth.

“I am yours, Theon and you are mine. There isn’t any length I won’t go to keep what is mine and what I love safe, Reek.”

Theon lost his footing, swept away by the undertow.


	16. I Will Flay Myself For You

“Ramsay,” Theon whispered. He put his chin on the broad white chest. His eyes glowed like jars of honey in the sun when the light from the fireplace lit them. “Ramsay?”

“What, pet?” Ramsay was almost dozing now and his voice was thick. He ran his hands down Theon’s back firmly grabbing a lean buttock and massaging it lazily.

Theon sucked at his lip and stifled a low moan. He bit a giddy smile. “I like saying your name.” He laid his head on Ramsay’s chest but looked up smiling.

Looking down at those large eyes and the even larger goofy grin, Ramsay laughed. “I like hearing you say it. How about we go between calling me Ramsay and Master? Like the way I go between calling you Theon and Reek. We are going to have to just learn when it seems right to use our names. And..” Ramsay felt uncertain, as if the power might be slipping away and then he cleared his throat. “I need to hear you call me Master too sometimes. I don’t want to ever worry that you are forgetting who I really am, Theon. I call you Reek because to me, you are that wonderful, perfect person that I named. I like it, pet, I can’t help that. And if you didn’t call me Master on occasion, I honestly think it would bother you not to do it.” His voice was steady but there was a tiny thread of unrest or fear in it.

Theon swallowed, then slowly smiled, closed-lipped and lopsided. “I need to… sometimes; when you… when I’m in trouble.” He hid a little putting his nose to Ramsay’s ribs, but his eyes still smiled. “When I am lost, sometimes. It’s like an anchor,” he said softly. He looked away to the fire then his eyes darted back laughing. “When you fuck me and say… the things you do.” He rubbed his foot in to the sheets and chewed the inside of his lip.

Ramsay wanted to be very careful with this. His pet needed a little freedom, he needed to loosen the leash or it might snap. He did find that he liked this part of Theon he never knew before. This laughing, teasing and holy hells, responsive boy was as enchanting as Reek himself. He needs to understand they are one person and Ramsay suddenly saw that he would never have just his Reek again. This was Theon, who was Reek deep down but it was one person. He had to love the whole thing not just his beloved little creation. There was really no turning him back into Reek. Ramsay knew that and he knew how desperately he loved this one person. Because he accepted it. It hurt but he knew that some of Theon’s behaviors that he hated, despised might have to be accepted and suffered through _. I love him, I can do that for him_. So Ramsay reached down and grabbed a fistful of brown curls and slowly pulled Reek up his body until they were face to face. With a little smirk Ramsay playfully spoke. “And when you are in trouble, or lost, or scared...or simply because you need it, I will call you Reek. Is that agreeable to you, _Reek_?” Ramsay made sure he emphasized the name.

Theon whined. He looked down and pursed his lips. “Yes, Master. I… I am still your Reek. I will be good. You have been patient. It… it will be better, don’t you think?” A smile broke on his face like the first rays of dawn. “I have a coconut butter balm, for your back. There is a warm spring below us. They say this island was made from glowing, melting rock and the fire below heats the springs. I would take you.” Theon tried to sit up. There are salts and oils we can use.” He grabbed Ramsay’s wrist and bounced slightly on the mattress.

Ramsay grinned back and let go of his pet, letting him keep his wrist. “You look like an excited puppy going out for a game of fetch. Are you my eager little puppy then? Alright, puppy, we can go out for some playtime.” Ramsay gently teased, relieved to have a change of subject. He tousled Reek’s hair as he would a dog, something he does to Reek anyway. “Show me your heated springs, puppy.” As Ramsay got out of the bed, wincing he taunted, “That butter balm thing and your springs better work on my injuries or you might get some of your own tonight.Let me try to recall every word...maybe I should just act like an angry child and sulk?” Ramsay laughed and hugged his pet.”I always called you a slow learner when I was irritated with you...but you picked up some things pretty fast after all.”

 

Theon went around the pool lighting candles. It was warm and steamy in here and smelled of salts and sweet oils. “There’s a cold spring as well… I forget which island it’s on… that the ruling have used to ensure our people always have fresh water, but this one is a secret. I think there may be rumors of baths in the depths of my tower, like the rumors of…” Theon stopped speaking and walking. He shook his head, as if to rid himself of the thought. “Here,” he found the jar he wanted laying in an open chest. “It will hurt at first, but then it warms and melts. Its very soothing. You will have never felt so clean.” Theon presented Ramsay with the jar. “Do you like the smell? There are others… but, I thought,” he shrugged and looked at his feet, “you may like that.” The fear in his stomach was strangely light and fluttering, something new. “You might have to be brave,” he giggled looking at Ramsay’s feet now. “It would be worth it.”

Ramsay grinned and went to Theon, nearly shoving him with his chest. “Oh? I am not sure if I feel brave enough. Will you protect me if I need it, pet? Will you comfort me when it hurts, sweet boy?” His voice was low and velvet as he smiled at his boy, the skin glowing from the flickering candlelight. He took off his tunic and breeches, grimacing a little when he had to bend down. “Look how abused I am? You should feel terrible, Theon. What a cruel man you can be, My Lord. Come soothe my pains, would you be gentle?” Ramsay teased.

Theon blinked then slammed into Ramsay grabbing the back of his head with both hands and kissing him passionately. The jar dropped and cracked. “Shit!” Theon pulled back, blushing. “No, wait!” He dropped down to pick up the clay jar. “I will fix it! Get in the waters, please? I can… there, heh, it’s only a small crack.” He rubbed his face closing his eyes. He used to be so good at this, but maybe that was another person. It was certainly another life.

Ramsay bent down and lifted his pet’s face to gently nibble on the boy’s always swollen lower lip. “Calm down, pet. Let’s get into the water together. There might be monsters swimming in those depths...you are the Kraken and I might need your protection. Come on, puppy.” He pulled Theon to his feet and helped him remove his clothing. Stopping every now and then to nip or kiss at him, crooning what a good boy he was. “Now, navigate me through the treacherous waters, Theon.” Ramsay put a single toe into the water then leaped back, shivering, doing an excellent parody of Skinner his first time on the beach. “Theon! Help me! I could drown and even though there are no seagulls in here..what about fish that eat humans! I heard about that and don’t want to be eaten by fish!” Ramsay mimicked Skinner’s stretched out sour face and sucked at his teeth like Skinner does.

Theon pursed his mouth to one side and walked into the pool with a contented sigh. He always liked it here, though he vaguely remembered Rodrick throwing him in and holding him under. Maybe that was just a dream. He didn’t remember what his brothers looked like until Asha showed him that painting. He moved back to make way for Ramsay to come in.

“Do you know why he hates me?” Theon’s voice went flat, though he tried to smile. “Because he doesn’t want to share you with me.” Theon ran his hands through the water, watching the trails they left dissolve. “It started in the Dreadfort. I didn’t know if you had ever noticed, it always felt… I never thought I had the right to complain and I’m not complaining now.” He cupped his hands to pull water to his face, but the water streamed through the holes in his hands. “I thought… you may want to know.”

Ramsay ducked under the water then reemerged directly in front of Reek. His eyes were intense even if they were slightly red rimmed from the water, it almost made his eyes demonic in a way. “Did he ever touch you, Reek? Ever threaten it? I want to hear specifics, my sweet boy. Right now, tell me everything that piece of filth tried to do to my sweet boy that I didn’t order done. Then I can decide his punishment. Tell me, Reek, don’t be scared, just tell Master.”

“No, please, I… I would never want to create a problem…”

He held his special boy’s face in his cupped hands, staring into the eyes, searching out truth. “I love you, I want to protect you and I need to know if Skinner ever violated you, ever meant to do it. Tell me right now, Reek. That is an order not a request.” Against his will, Ramsay was tightening his grip, his stance was aggressive and his eyes were merciless steel pits. How dare Skinner even THINK to touch his Reek? He is positive that Skinner would never dare such a thing now. But back then?

A flood of guilt hits him. He gave the men every chance to do it, every indication was sent that they could torment this boy at first. Ramsay had assumed the boys would only scare Theon with it, not actually do anything of a sexual nature to him. If Skinner did touch Theon, who’s fault was that really? But he needs to be sure what happened, he needs to know in order to make sure Skinner pays for it. He doesn’t want to hurt his pet, but he needs to know. “Reek.” Ramsay made his voice very low, it was a voice that was used before, just before the pain. “Did Skinner ever touch you? Did he only threaten it? You will tell me now.”

“Only, only… scared me really… with the torch. It was…” he squeezed his eyes shut. “In the kennels after Moat Cailin… when Ben gave me.” He pointed to his neck. He couldn’t stop shaking and his body tried to wrench away. “In the cage, he shoves it through the bars. There's nowhere to go.” It all felt fresh as though he was there again. “This.” He pointed to the burn on his chest. “I wasn't trying to run. I was locked in the cage! I wasn't being bad! It's was not fair! I was only sleeping when he came! I did not do it.” Theon pushed Reek out of his mind but sang the same chorus.

_Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run._

“I should to forget it all. Things come back in sensations or pictures…” he felt exhausted but regained hold of himself. “I’m sorry, Master.”

Ramsay tried to gently pull his Reek into his embrace, slowly smashing Reek into his chest, wrapping his arms around the boy. “Hush, it is alright, Reek. You did nothing wrong, you are such a good boy for me. I love you and that was the past. It will never happen again, Reek. Not any of it, ever again. You are safe with your Master now, even when I am not with you, you are safe. You are a king, your men will always keep watch over you. No one will ever again touch you but me. I will flay off the fingers of any person who dares to touch my boy. My Reek. My good sweet obedient boy. I am very sorry that Skinner did that to you. He will pay for it, I promise you. Should I flay off his cock or balls for you, Reek? Or do you want to punish him yourself?”

Stroking his pet’s hair, Ramsay sat back in the hot water, leaning against the rocks. He cuddled his little pet and spoke softly. “Of course, we did tell Skinner that he must let go of the past, so we must be clever about this. If he feels this is a punishment for something he did so long ago, then we lied and didn’t let go of the past. It shall be a lesson instead that he must start to learn. I need you to learn that no one except me is ever above you now. And I need Skinner to understand that you are no longer prey. So I think I have a way for you to get him back and for both of you to learn an important lesson. For now on, let’s make Skinner your personal guard! Torture him as you will and show him how capable you are. What do you think of this idea, Reek?”

Theon hid his head under Ramsay’s chin. “A fine idea, Master. I can forgive him. I need much forgiveness myself. I tried to find strength through cruelty when it seemed necessary but it only brought me regrets.” Theon watched his fingers rise out of the gently lapping waters to surround and crush a bubble. He smiled to himself. “It’s not for me, I think.” _Weak, meek, sweet_ felt more true than _Lord Reaper_.

Ramsay kissed Theon’s damp curls then licked droplets off his skin, licking his scars. “I am sorry, puppy. I am sorry for what I did to you, Reek. I regret it, I really do. Do you forgive me, pet? It was wrong of me, I know that. I love you and swear you will never feel that ever again.” He turned up his pet’s face to see him better. “Look at me. I am sorry for all that happened at Dreadfort, at Winterfell. Well, sorry for all that I did to you, at least. I can’t promise not to hurt you on occasion, I am a monster after all. But I swear you will never be made to feel the way you did then. I might hit you in temper, but I will never flay, whip or cut you. Never humiliate or degrade you as I did back then. Do you believe me? Do you forgive me?”

Theon nodded. “I already have.”

Ramsay rubbed his thumbs across his pet’s face, tracing the fine features.”I am glad you aren’t cruel like me. You are not made for that, I am. You are what keeps me from being too much of a monster. Maybe you are my conscience.”

“I wish I was strong as you are, in all the ways that you are. I wish I could take from life as you have, as I was meant to do. I can try to be your conscience and let you be my strength. Do you think we can’t separate because of how we fit together?” Theon pushed his palm against Ramsay’s, pushing their hands up above the water together. They splayed their fingers together. “Where we’re the same,” he weaved four fingers between Ramsay’s five, “and where we’re opposite. I think they locked in place.”

Ramsay smiled and agreed. “We are matching pieces. But one needs the other to be complete.”

Theon stretched and yawned in Ramsay’s lap. His adrenaline had crashed and the rum kept him as warm as the water did. “Ready?” He took the jar from the ledge and pushed away to circle around Ramsay’s back. “Restrain yourself from hitting me,” Theon said softly by his ear. He kissed Ramsay’s forehead. “You have to be calm and, ha ha, still.” Theon dipped two fingers into the grainy concoction. “It’s some combination of cane sugar, aloe, coconut oil, honey, whiskey,” he started applying it to Ramsay’s back, “and lots of sea salt.”

Ramsay wished Theon had brought the fucking gag. At first he just winced and groaned then all of a sudden the burning kicked in. “OH FUCK! THAT BURNS!” He roared out then just grabbed hard to the ledge and shut his eyes. Gritting his teeth he asked, ”How long do I feel this for? And I hope you are enjoying yourself, Theon. I will remember it.” Even though his voice was strained with pain, there was no anger or real threat in the words.

Theon sniggered, feeling a little giddy. “Here, here!” He took a cup filled it with water and poured it on Ramsay’s back. “See? It cleans wounds like nothing else. You’ll be amazed how your little welts will heal. Does it feel nice now? A little numb?” He hopped on Ramsay’s back and wrapped his arms around the wide, bright shoulders, setting his chin by Ramsay’s neck. “Let me do your hands and feet! It feels good on healthy skin. It will make you feel so smooth and clean that you’ll forgive me for everything. There’s an oil for your hair and,” his eyebrows jerked up, “soft towels.” He lightly chewed on Ramsay’s shoulder.

Rolling his eyes, Ramsay said, “You wish to pamper me, pet? By all means make me pretty for you, Your Grace.” He fluttered his eyelashes at Reek and gave the usual adoring look that Gwen favors Theon with. “Wait, I see what this is now. You keep chewing on me, tasting me...first you wash me off, then you have marinated me...now you are adding your seasoning before you turn cannibal.” He pretended to slowly edge away nervously. Theon jumped onto him again and bit at his ear.

 

Ramsay had to admit it, in spite of the earlier pain of the lotion his back felt much better. In fact all of his skin tingled and never felt so smooth and clean before. He knew he discovered at least something he liked about this pile of rocks he will help rule. He was striding purposefully forward looking for Skinner. Seeing him, he beckoned the man to follow him. Taking him outside, Ramsay found a secluded spot Theon often uses, so he could be sure no one heard or saw anything. It was important to make sure that Skinner wasn’t humiliated beyond what he could endure. He must be careful, his friend was prideful and if Ramsay brought him too far down, he risked Skinner leaving him or betraying him and he knew it.

“Do you remember that I said we shall forget thinking the way we did in the past?” He waited for Skinner to nod then continued. “Good. So that is why I am not beating the living shit out of you or peeling some of your flesh off. My poor boy is trying to forget the past, but he sheds it slowly...sometimes out loud to me. I had not seen how much you wanted to play with him. It is a very lucky thing for you that I didn’t know.”

“What the fuck did I do?!” Skinner threw his hands out at his sides in exasperation.

“Ramsay screamed enraged words into Skinner’s face, his hands clenching into fists. “WHAT DID YOU DO? YOU WANTED TO FUCK MY REEK! SHOVING YOUR COCK INTO HIS CAGE, LYING TO GET HIM HURT WORSE BECAUSE HE DIDN’T JUST SUCK YOU OFF? YOU WOULD HAVE RAPED HIM IF YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD GET AWAY WITH IT!”

The color drained from Skinner’s face. “It was but a joke, Ramsay. I was drunk…” he couldn’t think of a better excuse. “He may have exaggerated. He was… very sick. Is th- I mean, that was a mistake. It was one time and it was a mere jape!”

Ramsay stopped yelling and now his voice was very soft. “Theon didn’t see it as a joke. And ever since then you have treated him worse than any other victim we have had. You have a hatred for him. I hope it isn’t due to jealousy of wanting something you cannot have. Things must change for all of us here. Your attitude will change too. For now on, you are Lord and King Theon Greyjoy’s personal bodyguard. Perhaps you just need to see him in a different light, Skinner. So this should hopefully help with that. And if you ever touch or threaten Theon, I will not react well to it.” Ramsay’s last sentence was spoken very ominously. He turned and walked away, tossing over his shoulder, “You start within the hour, Skinner. You will find Theon in the tower, I think. If he isn’t there, do your best to find him, then make your only goal in life to keep him safe and untouched by all but me.”

Skinner leaned against the stoney wall, crossing his arms. “Well, fuck you then, I’ll just go back to fucking… Highgarden! Always yelling at me, ‘kill them’ ‘fetch that’ ‘meh, there’s a seagull, Skinner go get it, hur hur.”

Ramsay popped around the corner. “WHAT?”

“NOTHING!” Skinner jumped up and put his hands behind his back. “I’m thinking where Theon may be is all.”

 

Skinner stomped up the stairs into the tower, fuming. Why should he babysit and nearly bow down to this skinny little fucker? Ramsay’s fucktoy no matter how you dress him up, that is all that little sniveling fucker was good for. So he wanted to fuck the pathetic mess in the past. So he had a little too much fun tormenting the little puke? Who really cares? Apparently Ramsay does and Skinner will obey even if it nearly kills him. He has followed Ramsay for so long and what else would he do? So Skinner decided this was Theon’s fault and he will find a way to pay that little cunt back for it.

Skinner smelled honeyed biscuits before he even heard Severin running down the stairs. The boy stopped, almost falling back when their eyes met. He was carrying a basket with folded bright white linen. Severin pulled a biscuit out from it and smiled with disdain as he bit into his treat and tried to pass.

With a mean grin and a malicious joy to have someone to pass this anger onto, Skinner stood in the boy’s way. “I didn’t know thralls ate so well. Such a pampered little boy now, look at you.” He swiped the biscuit and crammed it into his mouth, almost gagging but forcing himself to swallow it down. “Or did you steal this? Did you steal your King’s biscuits, little thrall?” Skinner leaned over the boy and slowly yanked out his blade.

Severin dropped the basket and tried to climb backwards, one stair at a time. “His Grace would not want you to harm me, and what about your master? What would he think? His rules seemed very clear even for a Northern beast like you.”

Sneering at the boy, kicking the basket into the wall, Skinner replied. “Ramsay isn’t my master, he is my leader. There is a difference you know. As for you, no one but the King gives a fuck if you live or die. You exist because Ramsay wants a way to keep his pet in line without hurting his dainty little kingly body. And I don’t give a fuck what Theon wants from me he doesn’t control me, boy. My only job is to see that the King is not hurt, no one said fuck about not hurting you.” With that, Skinner reached the stairs and grabbed the boy by his tunic, yanking him towards him.  

“Ah, ah,” the boy cried, trying to sound less panicked than he was. “Your leader said I wouldn’t be harmed unless my King displeased him. If I get hurt without my Lord being at fault, I am no longer his whipping boy but a poor child you’re abusing. Let us seek out your leader so you can beg permission to change the rules of his game. I would hate to cause you undue suffering.” Skinner growled and lunged, chasing the boy back up the stairs. He deliberately let the boy stay ahead of him but gave him some sharp kicks to the ass to help him on his way. “Little shit! Run you little mouse!” He taunted the boy until he ran back into his room.

 

“Gwyn?” Damon pushed through the kitchen, knocking over a tall lean boy, who dropped a bin of dirty dishes.

“Oye! Go on and-” Fat Merrick stopped, looking up and up to find where Damon ended, near the ceiling. “Oh, you-you’re one of Lord Euron’s men. How can I serve you?”

“Where’s Gwynesse?”

“She should be fetching a balm to bring Ki-rr-Lord Theon.”

Damon frowned. “What does that mean? Where is she then?”

“The Maester is in the next tower.”

“Then she’ll pass through this one to get to Euron’s?”

“Uh, well, yes. Yes, she would have to.”

“Good man. Here, get your kitchen another girl.” Damon tossed him a coin purse. “I’m going to take mine.”

 

Gwynn set the bag on her hip and turned around to push the handle down with her elbow and opened the door with her back. The tower was blessedly still. She hated the bridges on windy days when the sea spray would mist and come roaring up with gales to sting her eyes. She wiped her face with her shawl and bumped into a warm wall.

“Hullo! Why Gwynesse, where are you going?”

Gwyn screamed and stumbled back to the door. “No! No!” She shoved the bag at him and fled to the bridge. Damon threw the door open, ducking to get out of it, and wrapped his arms around her, taking her to his chest. “No need to run!” She kept kicking and gasping “These bridges are dangerous in such weather.” He swept an arm under her knees.

“Please don’t hurt me!”

“Hurt you? We’re getting married! I will keep you safe from harm! Wait,” She cried out when he stooped low. He stood and she cowered thinking he would hit her. When she opened her eyes, in his fist were flowers. “For you!”

“Oh… how lovely.” She cried out again when bent to swoop her bag off the ground.

“I have to bring that to Lord Theon!”

“We will. King Euron will marry us. You're cold? I have a warm fur blanket.”

“Cold?”

 

Alyn held a hand up when Damon strode in. “No guests in the tower.

“Tell Euron I brought Gwyn to take as my sugar girl.”

Alyn nodded and went inside.

 

Damon beamed down at Gwyn until Alyn  reappeared. “Theon said ‘No.’”

“Oh? And his Lord uncle?”

Alyn shrugged, “He’s out.”

“I’ll be right back, little bride.” Damon set the girl down and pushed Alyn aside.

 

“What do you mean ‘No’?” Damon demanded, bursting in past a sulking Skinner.

Theon was out on the balcony. The scars on his back and chest had grown silky white as the rest of him tanned and freckled. “No. It's the opposite of ‘yes.’ Find another girl.”

“But why? Ramsay said I could. Is this your revenge upon me? I was never unduly cruel to you! I saved you from _him_ ,” he threw an accusatory finger to Skinner, “remember?!”

“ _Shut up about that_!” Skinner rasped.

“It's no vengeance, Damon. Find another and I'll marry the two of you myself, the old way, the Northern way, and gift you land and a title.”

“Fine, a generous offer, my Lord but I want Gwynesse.”

“No.” Theon turned to hold the cold railing. “Now leave me.”

“WHY?” Damon roared.

“Because she's MINE!” Theon screamed into the wind, still gripping the railing as though it were the helm of a storm tossed ship. “Leave me this ONE thing, damn you! I will protect ONE person of the leagues that I've betrayed.”

“As with Sansa?” Damon dropped the bag Gwyn brought on the floor.

“Yes,” Theon conceded miserably. “You wouldn’t understand.”

 

Ramsay had glanced at the nervous girl standing in the doorway of the tower then at Alyn who was grinning. “Something you need, sweetheart? Are you looking for King Theon? He is inside, don’t be afraid to go up there, the men won’t hurt you.” His voice was sweet poison, unable to help but remember how Theon seemed to like this girl.

He brushed past her and went inside. He entered the bedchamber to hear Damon and Theon yelling at each other. He felt icy cold at Theon’s scream and walked to the balcony. Very slowly and carefully, Ramsay asked, “Who is yours, Theon? And why are the two of you screaming at each other?”

Theon turned around slowly. “Who… what?”

“Gwynesse,” Damon came closer to entreat upon Ramsay. “May I wed her, please? Why should she be Theon’s?”

Ramsay arched an eyebrow, then smirked. “Theon, you are mine. And I don’t recall giving you Gwyn. If Damon wants to marry his sugar girl, he shall.” He thought he was being reasonable. He wanted to throw Reek onto the bed and rape him while making him scream who he belongs to. He wants to hurt his pet until he swears there will never be anyone else to look at but his Master.He could have gotten the girl and flayed her alive for daring to tempt his Theon, his Reek. But he did not and simply crossed his arms, considering the matter to be closed. _I can let this go. I can._

Across the room, Skinner picked the bag Damon dropped up off the floor.

An anger he didn’t know he possessed welled up inside Theon. He gripped the railing at his back and fought to speak softly. “I meant to say that she’s my friend. She doesn't want Damon. He should leave her be.”

“Oh!” Skinner laughed, happy to pounce. “Your friend sent you a gift!” He wagged a bottle of whiskey, wearing his malicious grin.

“What? I did not ask for that…” his anger began falter, dragging his courage along with it.

Ramsay stared at the bottle then stared hard at fucking Theon. “It isn’t yours? You didn’t order that, Theon? Because if you didn’t, then I am going to order that girl to come here and I will punish her myself for bringing that shit to you. So did you ask her for it or not?” His voice was hard, there was no mercy left in it. He had none left, Theon had just stomped all over Ramsay’s good intentions and kindness. He felt betrayed on every level. To force Theon to stare as he whipped that girl’s large breasts. Then he will pour that entire fucking bottle between her legs. He forced himself to gain control then stared at his pet. “Who’s idea, Theon? Yours or hers?”

Theon blinked his stinging eyes. “But… it must have been a mistake!” He attempted his most charming smile. “I don’t even _like_ whiskey!” Theon threw his hands up at the ludicrous misunderstanding.

Ramsay had taken as much as he can. He has tried so hard and Theon acting so cavalier about such a serious thing, it was too much. It took only seconds for him to reach his pet and another second for his fist to crash into that lovely face. He watched Theon clutch his face and stagger against the railing. “I am trying very hard, Theon. Help me out here, would you, sweetling?” His voice was an old one back to haunt them, it was a very dangerous voice that just needs blood. “Did you perhaps tell the girl, maybe hint to her that you wished for stronger spirits...while you were staring at those lovely breasts, did you perhaps flirt a bit and mention your love for stronger drink? Hints that were just suggestive enough for the poor thrall to assume you wished for her to get it for you? Hmm?”

He grabbed Theon by his tunic and dragged him forward then nearly spit his words into the pet’s face. “She isn’t your fucking friend, REEK! The girl is a thrall, a maid, a servant, having pretty tits and throwing herself at you doesn’t make her your friend. Her bringing you the poison that you are NOT ALLOWED doesn’t make her your friend. Are you trying to hurt me, Reek? Why don’t you really want Damon to have that girl? Is she the one I have to let you fuck in order for you to stop this bullshit? Huh? How about I let you fuck her, then I can flay her living? WHO AM I BLAMING FOR THE WHISKEY?” Ramsay shook Theon and then backhanded him. “DID you suggest to her that you wanted spirits and she misunderstood? Or did you ask her to bring it?” Ramsay put Theon’s face between his hands and stared into his defiant Reek’s eyes. “Answer me, Reek.”

Theon puffed his cheek out to remove his teeth from the cuts they'd made. His spit the blood away from Ramsay’s boot. “It… I'm sure it was my fault. I'm sorry. I should have told her to stop bringing liquor for me. I could have but I did not. She didn't know. I'm sorry, Master.” Tears streamed he was rocking between confusion and guilt, unable to plant his feet on the ground. He felt nauseous and sent a hand back to take hold of the railing.

Ramsay tried to calm himself, look at Reek’s tears, he is contrite, surely he is. But Theon is heading for a bad path,he can feel it. Drinking, sneaking and now wanting to save this girl with the big tits he likes to stare at and fantasize about. This will end now, I can control this. “Skinner, bring me Severin. You force me to do this, Reek. I asked you to stop drinking and now I find pretty girls bringing you whiskey in secret. Damon asks a reasonable request and you unreasonably and rudely deny him for no true reason. What am I to think, Reek? Are you changing? Do you want to be a pirate that swills poison and fucks every large breasted cunt that comes along? Would it make you feel more manly? Or am I just not as interesting anymore, maybe I misread things? HUH?” He paced the room angrily and shouted at Skinner who was watching with a malice filled grin. “GET THAT BOY! DO NOT MAKE ME REPEAT MYSELF!”

Skinner jumped at the chance and went happily went running.

“Please don’t! _Please_ , Master! I'm sorry! I'll tell her now in front of you and Damon. I’m sorry, Damon! Just hurt _me,_ I'm begging you!” He kept sputtering ‘please’ and fell on his hands and knees.

And here was Ramsay’s Reek. Here was solid ground, here was something the monster can understand. I can control myself the same as I can control him. So Ramsay crouched in front of his pet. This was the way he always had loved Reek best, hands and knees, begging for forgiveness, approval and love.

So Ramsay lifted his pet’s chin with a finger and forced eye contact. “I know you are sorry, Reek. And I won’t hurt you, my love. I want to show mercy, but you need to learn, sweetling. I mean what I say, you have to learn that. When I told you not to drink without my permission, I meant it. And this soon  you already have defied me. So I have no choice but to punish Severin. Now, here is what I am going to offer you. A choice. Pay very close attention because you have gone back to being a slow learner.” Ramsay thought, _too harsh, don’t be mean because you feel hurt, it won’t help._

Taking a deep breath, Ramsay continued, determined but softer in tone. “I am sorry, Reek. I shouldn’t call you a slow learner, I am very sorry, pet. Here are the choices. You can be a very good boy for me and I will allow Alyn to just administer a spanking with his hand to Severin. If you misbehave, if you argue with me just the tiniest bit right now, I will have Skinner give the boy a beating with his belt. Do you understand me, Reek?”

Theon kept his eyes on Ramsay’s. “I understand, Master. Thank you for your patience and mercy. I will be good for you.”

Ramsay smiled and rubbed his pet’s cheek. “Good boy. I am glad to hear that you appreciate my mercy. Now here is what is going to happen. Damon is going to bring up his sugar girl. You are going to do your kingly duty and marry them. You will be polite and you will congratulate them. You will let the girl know that Damon is good for her. You will be happy for them. After they are married and leave us, we will deal with Severin. And understand that his punishment is for the drinking alone. We will discuss your upset over Gwyn and Damon later on.”

Skinner came into the room dragging a harassed Severin with him. Ramsay looked over and said, “Boy, go stand in a corner in this room and be invisible until I require you.”

Giving Reek a biting kiss, Ramsay helped him to his feet. “My good boy, I am going to help you. Don’t worry, Master is here to help you. Even when I am very angry with you, I still love you and we will get through this together.” He whispered this into his boy’s ear and held Reek tight to his chest for a moment. “I want you to calm down and take a deep breath.” Looking over at Damon with a smirk, Ramsay said, “Go get your sugar girl and your King will marry you.”

 

Damon came flying through the door with a sunshine grin, knocking Alyn over again. “Come, Gwyn!” He wrapped a hand around her wrists and dragged her inside. 

Alyn sat up rubbing his head.”Asshole.”

 

“Ready!” Damon squeezed Gwynesse into his side. She cowered away from Ramsay’s glare.

He tried hard not to look at Gwyn with searing hatred instead he tried on a charming smile. “Ah, what a lucky day for you, girl! Going from thrall who has to throw herself at Lords for protection, to salt wife of a pirate. Damon is one of my men, girl. He is strong, clever and very good with his whip. You’ll find out about that I am sure. Keep throwing your cleavage in the faces of other men and you will find out very fast about that whip _.” I am being cruel and I know it._ Ramsay struggled with himself for a moment then spoke again. “King Theon will marry you now, dear girl. Aren’t you happy? Grateful? You should be.”

Ramsay looked to Theon and made a gesture to begin.

Theon staggered to his feet and slowly made his way. The corner of his left eye was beginning to swell. Dry blood made a thin trail from side of his mouth.

Ramsay suddenly was there before Theon with a soft rag. He quickly and gently washed his face. “Good boy, you can do this for me, for Severin. You are my special boy, aren’t you? Go marry them like a King.”

“Yes, Master. We should go to the sea,” Theon said dejectedly.

Ramsay moved closer to Reek and pulled his face gently to look into his eyes. Here was his lovely boy, but he needed Theon to do the wedding. A King was needed, not a pet. “Good boy. I know you want to obey me and be very good. I need you to be Theon right now, not Reek.  You are a King, my love, I need you to act like it. Just for a little bit and then I will let my sweet boy rest in my arms. Can you do that for me? Show me that you are a King, you can do that...you are my King. You know that, don’t you? That you are everything to me? Come on, Theon, let us go perform a wedding. I have never seen this before, show me.” As Ramsay spoke he was gently moving him towards the door. He motioned for Damon to leave ahead of them. Quickly, Ramsay dressed himself and Reek as he tried to turn himself back into Theon. “Let’s go now. You can do this, can’t you, Theon? My King?”

Theon spun the mirror on his vanity so the wooden back faced him. “Yes, Ramsay.” He glanced over his shoulder, furrowing his brow. His head still felt like bog. “Outside of our tower… what shall I call you? Euron?” He lifted his chin, hardened his countenance, stood to his full height and sighed before approaching Ramsay who waited in the doorway.

Smiling approvingly, Ramsay said, “You will call me Euron in front of all others. The boys, Severin and Damon’s sugar girl do not count. However, during this ceremony call me Euron. A ceremony draws attention and others might come over to see it.” With a steel hand on Theon’s shoulder, Ramsay hurried Theon down the hallway. He had already told Skinner to keep the boy in the room. No sense dragging some peasant boy who would flee the first chance he had all the way to the beach. He propelled Theon towards the beach.

 

They brought lanterns, as the sun was setting and the groom should light the way home. Gwynnesse had seen enough of her friends married in such ceremonies and had brought Damon to stand in the push and suck of cold water at the shore. Theon drew a deep breath for courage and wished to get that whiskey he didn’t even send for after all this was over. He took off his shoes and rolled his britches to his knees. When he walked into the water, he thought he saw Ramsay start after him before regaining himself, but maybe it was a trick of shadows and the orange sun on the horizon. Still, he smirked to himself and warmed a bit where his heart was leaden. _Am I going to swim away?_

He snatched seaweed, thick and slimy from the water. It was floating to him without his seeking it, a good sign if that meant anything in reality. “Gwynnesse, Damon, I would ask you to join hands.” He flinched tying the knot and stepped back with a grunt. “I, Theon of house Greyjoy, fourth of my name, son of Balon, Rock King of the Iron Islands stand before those gathered here to bind man and woman. Who comes to take… to claim this woman?”

“I do. Damon, by right of your Uncle, Euron Greyjoy, Salt King of the Iron Islands and Lord Reaper thereof.”

Theon lost the ability to will his tongue on for a moment then continued. “Who do you claim as your Salt Wife and by what right?”

“I claim Gwynnesse, a thrall I deem worthy. Her I purchased through strength. What man would stop me?”

Theon waited for any objection, for the sea to claim her or him instead. “None. Before the Drowned God let none claim her hereafter. Will you care for this woman and all children she bears you until her death or yours?”

“I will. Until her death or my own.”

“Gwynesse, will you take and obey this man?”

She trembled under Damon already. With heartbreak on her face, she shook her head.

“It will be alright,” Theon assured her. “Damon is kindhearted to those he cares for. He cares for you and will see that you want for nothing.” He was close to certain that he wasn't lying this time.

“I…” she craned her neck to see her groom, “I will take and obey him.”

“Then, in sight of these witnesses, the Drowned God and your ancestors, take this blessing to bind you.” He filled a conch shell with sea water and poured it on their joined hands. “Guide her to the home where you will keep her safe,” Theon mumbled. He tossed the shell into a cresting wave.


	17. Monsters Rising from the Water

Damon swung Gywn across the threshold , holding her close to his chest. “How do you like our chambers?”

“Oh… lovely.”

“You’re still cold?” He tossed her on the bed. “Get under the covers and I’ll start a fire.”

“I… I shiver because I am frightened.” Gwynnesse backed to the headboard.

Damon turned around, looking the room over. “Of what?” She only stared, wide-eyed at him. “Me? Ah!” He took the whip from his belt and threw it into the chair across the room. “Better?”

She nodded with a nervous smile. “My lord-”

“I’m not a lord.”

“I tried to tell you before, I’ve already known a man.”

Damon pulled his leather tunic over his head. “I would think so.”

“I mean to say,” she pulled a fur blanket up to her nose. “I have lost my maidenhead.”

“Good! Then it won’t hurt so much… I think.”

“You… you aren’t upset?”

“I lost my virtue as well,” he laughed, “in many ways. Well, little wife?” He grinned, setting his hands on his hips.

“Yes, my, uh, husband?”

“Do you like me now?”

Gwyn giggled. “I think so. You are handsome.” Still, she cried out when he climbed on the bed.

“I knew you loved me. I saw how you blushed and smiled for me. You hung closer to me than the other men.”

“Love? I did like you best to be sure.”

“Because I am so handsome?”

Gwyn’s giggle was a little twinkle. It made Damon crazy. He started kissing her little feet and she cried out again in surprise. “Damon?”

“Yes, my heart?”

“Why do you like me?”

He put her foot on his shoulder and kissed the inside of her ankle. “You are beautiful and kind. I could tell. There is a depth and sharpness to your exquisite eyes. Annnd! I knew how you loved me!”

“Oh,” Gwyn gasped. “You are a sweet and silly man.”

“But what is the matter?” Damon rubbed her thigh gently and frowned.

“I’m scared still. The other time… it was very bad.”

“Hmm. I know! We shalln’t consummate tonight. Then you will be able to relax and we may enjoy one another. Good? Now are you happy?”

She started crying. “You are so kind, my Damon. Thank you.”

“What…” Damon felt panicked. “But, why are you upset? Please don’t cry so pitifully.” At last it dawned upon him. Damon lowered his voice. “Gwyn, my love, what do you mean it was very bad? Who was very bad to you?”

 

Theon sat staring at the fire. He hadn’t bothered to change his clothes or put his boots back on. He felt numb inside. That was fine.

Ramsay stared out the window and looked down at the waves, like a blue blanket spanning far off into everywhere. As much as Ramsay didn’t particularly enjoy sailing, he enjoyed the thought of pirating. The basic ideas of it were interesting to him. The bloody tales of plunder, rape and battling sounds enchanting. Right this minute Ramsay wishes he were out there for real. Killing, stealing, hunting, fucking and skinning whores, anywhere but here. He felt sick, his head hurt, stomach in knots and he was so very tired.

He should be relieved, it was over now. At least one thing was. Damon has Gwyn and will keep her away from Theon. Who will get over it and pay attention to Ramsay alone. He will eventually get a girl for them to try together and Theon can explore all he likes. Maybe for his name day? Of course it would only be that night and Theon never need know that Ramsay will flay her alive the next day. It was over.

Theon had his little outburst, apologizes to Damon for it. He did as he was told and that was good. Ramsay can let it go, he can. He has. It is done. Yes. So why was Ramsay still so upset?

Theon broke his promise about drinking. He swore he wouldn’t do it. Ramsay was kind enough to understand that he had to be weaned. He wasn’t a monster that wanted to make his prey, his love suffer anymore. He would let Theon have a certain amount every day that would get smaller until none was left. There was no reason for Theon to go behind his back and sneak whiskey. But maybe he hadn’t explained it to Theon. What if his pet just assumed that his Master meant none at all? He couldn’t go without it and panicked. Yes, but it was still lying, stealing and disobeying. Ramsay shook his head hard and shut all the voices off in his head. Then turned from the window.

 

“Can I go now?” Severin exclaimed from the corner. Theon put a finger to his lips and shook his head. “I am sick of these men. What about the promise you made me? Send them away and I’ll stay with you! You all keep staring off silently! And I HATE this one!” he added suddenly pointing up to Skinner’s amused face.

Ramsay chuckled and spoke to Severin. “I had called you here to punish you for something that King Theon needs to atone for. But upon seeing your attitude boy, this might be a little more for you than for him. You are going to spanked by Alyn, but if I continue to hear and see this arrogance of yours, it will become worse. Instead I will have Skinner take a belt to you.”

“I don’t think you should threaten me.” Severin pulled loose from Skinner and puffed out his chest. “I think you should let me join my family, the family my king gave me, so I don’t accidentally say something you will regret.” Severin spit in Ramsay’s direction. “I am loyal to Lord Theon not you. I will not be an instrument of his torture to serve you.”

“Severin!” Theon gripped his head with both hands. “You cannot speak that way to my Lord uncle! I am very sorry-”

“He is not your uncle. He has both his eyes.”

“No, no,  that is only a rumor! He is blind in one eye after an injury he obtained leaping from some height. He only started wearing the eyepatch after his travels. You have no idea what you are saying and who you say it to! That is treasonous!”

Theon couldn’t stop himself and flew to Severin shaking him. “This is not the time for what you think is bravery! Your arrogance will lose you everything! This is not who you are and you cannot force yourself to be so!”

Ramsay pulled them apart and grabbed Theon by his chin, staring into his eyes icily. “Calm down. The boy has not insulted me enough for me to flay him...yet. Go sit down. I won’t kill him, I promise.” He gave his pet the slightest shove then turned to the insolent little thrall.

Towering over him, using his very best glare, Ramsay smirked. “Aren’t we very clever and courageous? I warned you, didn’t I? You are not a very quick learner, are you? Rather slow to get things? DId your poor mother drop you on your head? Was she so tired after working herself to death all day just to feed you that she dropped you? I warned you and you didn’t listen. So now you can enjoy the attention of Skinner and his belt. And if you keep speaking, you’ll work your way up to my personal attentions.”

 

“I am the one who tried to warn YOU! I was not some peasant’s child. I was highborn before I was kidnapped. My mother didn’t work herself to death, she was beautiful and wore fine silk dresses. She also hired a maester who taught me to read.” Severin turned to Theon with furious tears burning in his eyes. “They’re all liars! Your sister, the princess, did send you a plea for help. They took it from me and then I was dragged in the great hall to hear him promise he would send help if she asked, but he read that letter! I saw him! Why won’t you send these men away? Princess Asha’s ship had wrecked north of the islands by … Flynn’s Landing or Rocks. She said she saw white men ravishing the north. Send them away and go save her, please! I swear to stay by your side!”

Theon blinked and swayed. His lips parted as his jaw sank.

“Fucking little shit” Ramsay snarled and backhanded the boy hard as hard as he would have hit Reek in that Dreadfort cell. He looked at Skinner and said, “After you beat Severin hard enough with that belt that he doesn't move for two days, sew his lips shut for the rest of the night. He can split the threads open himself in the morning for breakfast.” Skinner looked utterly delighted and nodded.

“No,” Theon uttered then he stood. “No. NO! Just send him away, please.” Theon stumbled back and ran to the balcony. “I cannot cause any more suffering. Is it just a trick? Everything? If not, please, please show me by granting me this favor, this mercy. I…” Theon looked over his shoulder and felt a sense of calm. “Please, Master?”

Ramsay shut his eyes and clenched his fists then forced himself to relax his body. “It isn’t a trick, love. Fine, very well, you win. Alyn, please escort that little pissant to his room and see that he doesn’t leave it. There, are you proud of manipulating me, Theon? Holding my love for you against me? He is safe and sound in his room.”

He felt a sense of fear and hated it, loathed it. Fighting against an urge to hurt his pet, to hurt anyone he could, Ramsay looked over at his pet. “Severin is back in his room. Now please, come inside.” He tried to make his voice velvet and persuading.

Theon looked back to the sea but squeezed his eyes shut and lowered his head. “Yes,” he sighed. “Thank you, Master. I am so grateful for your kindness.” He gritted his teeth and forced himself to push away from the railing. He crumbled under dread, and dropped to his knees to crawl inside. Theon stopped on the rug to drop his head. He started to weep his futile anger.

Ramsay jerked his head for Skinner to leave the room. After the door shut, Ramsay dropped to kneel before his sobbing pet. “Reek? I am sorry I lied. I can explain why. When you are ready to hear me, I will explain.” He reached a hand out to wipe away the tears, to stroke Reek’s cheek.

Theon sat up and wiped his face on his sleeve. He pulled back when Ramsay leaned closer. “I know you would never spare someone who insulted and thr- …” It seemed best not to press that point so he moved on quickly. “I understand you did it for me. I am grateful.” He kept staring into the fire. “I will listen, Ramsay.”

Ramsay hated that his pet pulled away from him. Part of him wanted to smack Theon and yell to never move away from his touch. But no, that was the old way, this is the new way. Explaining himself to anyone but his father was new and it was difficult.

 

Ramsay was glad his boys were out of the room. “Thank you for listening. And yes, I did it for your sake. First off, I did see those things, those dead things walking. If Asha is anywhere near them, she is already dead and walking with them. It is a suicide mission. Also, what do you think would happen if Asha did survive? Do you think she would just allow us to take over? Do you think she would believe I was Euron, even though she has met me? And before you  say about how she saved you...did she? Really? I recall that after her attempt at Dreadfort, she announced to one and all that you were dead. Asha only brought you home because she HAD to. This Kingsmoot would go better if she could have your support. It wasn’t for any other reason, Reek. She couldn’t win without the support of Lord Reaper. Do you think she will give it all up?”

“Well…” Theon curled, withering under the pain. “But, she does love me. It should be hers, the Seastone Chair. That is what our father wanted. She did try. She tried to save me when no one else cared. No one. My father and uncles hoped you would kill me to save them the embarrassment.” He found Ramsay’s eyes at last. “Please, let me try to find her.”

“A misguided sense of family duty isn’t love, Reek! She didn’t love you or save you, I did. Your father wanted her to have the Seastone Chair. I thought we have decided that we weren’t going to care anymore what that old fucker wanted? You are his last son, you are the rightful owner of that seat, Theon. Not anyone else. I will not allow you to give it up to another. No matter who they are.” Ramsay looked into his pet’s eyes then groaned, covering his own. His anger, worry and frustration were building high and he fought for control.

“I..”Ramsay shook his head and gave a tiny bark of angry laughter. “You really have been learning from your Master, haven't you? First you manipulate me into letting the boy go without any punishment, now you manipulate me about finding your sister. If I don’t let you go, I must worry all the time about you trying to escape me and search for her. Don’t even try to deny it! We both know it’s what you will do!”

“Ramsay, please, I’m not manipulating you! I’m a person! A living person with feelings of my own, that is all.” He whined and lowered his head. “Still, you’re right. You always are. I won’t set foot off this island without your leave, Master.” Theon stood to unbutton his damp jerkin. “Keep the boy here if you feel you must.” He dropped it and pulled his tunic over his head. It smelled of salt and the hard gritty soil underlying the rocky shore.

Sighing, Ramsay started to walk over to Theon to help him undress and change. “You aren’t manipulating me? Then why is your whipping boy safe and sound in his room when he should be getting a beating? Why am I here helping you change when I should be lecturing and punishing you? I almost hate loving you sometimes.” He muttered as he got a towel and rubbed down damp parts of his pet’s skin.

 

Suddenly there was a commotion outside the door and they heard Damon roar and the thud of Alyn going down. Damon smashed open the door and stared at Theon angrily.  He raised on colossal arm and pointed a finger at the gaunt man. “YOU! YOU SICK DRUNK RAPIST FUCKER! I AM GOING TO RIP YOUR COCK OFF AND GIVE IT TO MY SUGAR GIRL AS A PRESENT!”

Ramsay stared at the towering enraged man, then at his cowering, very pale pet. He stepped in front of his pet, then stared at Damon. “You will calm yourself and tell me what the fuck you are talking about. You will stop threatening your KING, you will not lay a hand on MY pet. Now what the hell are you accusing him of?”

Damon took two steps back and tried to force his anger down enough to speak clearly without screaming. He glared at Theon then said to Ramsay, “The last time he was here, he raped my poor Gwyn. That is why she kept thinking she was his! He hurt her, forced her and now she is terrified to have sex with me!  So much for being just a poor victim, Theon! How many other girls did you attack, boy?”

“I don’t… I don’t know. I barely remember that night. I didn’t think I was hurting her at the time. I have tried to make it up to her…”

“Make it up to her? How? She is scared half to death of sex! She never understood why you just grabbed her, promised to make her your salt wife then threw her onto a table! You took her on the fucking table while a small thrall swept the damned rushes! She cried and begged you to be gentle and instead you ravaged her. Then left her there bleeding with her skirts and bodice ripped open. She was half naked for all to see, fleeing to her room in tears. She bled for three days thanks to you! Too embarrassed to see a Maester and she just kept waiting for you to make her your salt wife. Everyone knew, Theon. Everyone. And Gwyn had to live with that...when you left again, she had to stay and be known as a slut. As the thrall who was raped on a public table by the arrogant prince fucking Theon! You say Ramsay is a monster? We are monsters? What about you, Theon? What the fuck are you?” Damon snarled out, calmer but still furious and disgusted.

Ramsay just kept staring at Theon as if he saw a new person there. “Did you do that, Theon?” He asked so softly as if he was afraid of the answer.

“I don't remember. I'm sorry. I never meant to be cruel. I didn't understand then. I was stupid. I couldn't marry her upon return, I saw how I frightened her. I have tried to help and protect her… I know the damage is not undone nor the memory forgotten.”

Damon glared at him breathing heavily. “I have always tried to help you out. I never hurt you more than I was told to. I actually was somewhat fond of you. I felt bad for you, tried to be your friend when we got here. Thought we would become friends eventually. I started to respect you, REEK. Then I meet the real Theon.” Damon sneered and hissed, “I wish Ramsay hadn’t just threatened to castrate you.” Damon stood straight and said as coldly as possible, “As her husband, I will ask that you do not speak to my wife again. Don’t even look at her.”

Theon sank to the floor, devastated.  “I won't, Damon. I am so very sorry. I didn't understand then… I do know now.”

 

For a moment it seemed like Damon was struggling with his own temper then he gave a stiff nod. He switched his gaze to Ramsay and asked, “I would like a few days off, to spend with my sugar girl. Let her get to know me, to know I am safe and won’t hurt her.” Wordlessly, Ramsay nodded and Damon left. A dreadful silence filled the room.

 

Ramsay knelt behind Theon, curved over him, but not quite touching. His lips close to Theon’s ear, he whispered. “Theon always drinks. It helps him, makes him brave, makes him clever and arrogant. It steadies him and allows him to show everyone how courageous he is. “Theon always drinks. Then he makes stupid decisions. He throws virgin thralls onto tables and rapes them.”

Ramsay was relentless, acid, poison, a sharpened blade right into Theon’s ear. “Theon always drinks. It makes him betray his friends. It makes him desperate enough to nearly get himself killed. It makes him hurt others. It makes him hurt himself. Theon always drinks. Theon always wonders why he is a victim. He doesn’t want the answer, so Theon drinks. We are weaning you off the bottle, Reek. I won’t stand for it any longer, I should be the ONLY monster in your life.”

 

“Off?” Theon jerked away. “All the way off? Oh, gods! I'll be the weak, pathetic, useless, trembling, sick and scared sack of shit I was before! I don't know to be Theon sober, only that creature!”

 

Ramsay yanked Reek’s head back to look into his eyes. “No! The only creature is what the drinking makes you become. I know! That was the asshole, that sick pathetic fuck I met the first time!  At Winterfell you drank instead of planning then gave a lovely fucking speech! You fucked it all up because you were too busy drinking and dreaming of what you would do to actually do it!”

 

“You’re right. I know. You’re right. You’re always right. But,” A pressure started building in him that he could not stop, “It's the things I did sober that I cannot remove from my mind's eye. Ramsay, I sent my own countrymen to hell for you,” he exclaimed, desperate for understanding.  “I lied to them and to Sansa. I gave you my best guess as to where Bran and Rickon may be when I could have lied as easily. I stood by as you had innocent men flayed and women ravaged by those dogs, who I also loved although I should have hated them if I made any sense at all!” Theon worked himself into a state of clarity and utter terror. “I had a thousand chances to kill you and I never even TRIED! Because sober Theon  fell in love with with the with the man torturing him! Your crimes are mine now! I did _nothing_ to stop them. I do nothing still.” Theon had exhausted himself and slumped forward. “I could drown the sea with my regrets.”

Ramsay yanked hard on Theon’s hair and forced eye contact again. “No. Those things were not your fault. I was controlling you, I had peeled your skin off and tortured you. I am very good at making others do as I wish, Reek. You know that. I am at fault for those things, not you. And those “countrymen” of yours, they never knew you and didn’t care about you even if they did. They would have betrayed you as easily, probably quicker if they thought it could save their skins. At Winterfell, they betrayed you to me, I had promised Dagmar free passage home for him and the men. They laughingly took it and said they wouldn’t lift a hand for the arrogant drunkard prince they were sick of following. Not one of those men would protect or care for you. Not one person. So why should you feel guilty for them? You are making excuses even to yourself of why you can’t stop drinking.”

He pulled his pet into his lap and held him tightly then spoke again. “Don’t panic over it, Reek. Trust your Master. I love you, I am going to help you get past this. It is an illness, Reek and needs to be treated. I am going to taper you down slowly, Theon. Not all at once, I promise. It won’t be like at Dreadfort where you dried out on a flaying cross. We will do this very slowly and carefully and I will be here for you every moment of it. Good boy, Reek, hush and be a good boy. I will let you have something to drink at dinner, I promise. If you really really need it, you may have two swallows now. I will keep your whiskey on me and give it to you in small doses. That and your one glass of rum should be sufficient for now.”

_I can always die_ , he consoled himself. That one thought was there for him through everything. It would be nice to please Ramsay. Theon curled against him. “Thank you. I’ll be good.” He closed four fingers around a bit of Ramsay’s tunic and pressed his eyes into Ramsay’s chest to hide there. “Would you tell me again why you didn’t kill me, Master?” he said softly. He let his swollen eye close and the other followed. “Please?”

Blinking away sudden stinging tears in his eyes, Ramsay said bitterly, “Because there was something in there, buried beneath that drunken stupid fucker. I saw the real you in there and knew I had to carve away until I found you. I love you, idiot. Don’t ever talk about you dying, Reek! Not ever, you do not have my permission to leave me. Now here, one sip. Just one and then we are going to rest. I will let you take a small nap with your Master protecting you.” Ramsay gave Theon a sip of the stuff that was poisoning his Reek’s body.   

 

Gwyn was pacing with the blanket wrapped around her when Damon came back into their chambers. He slowly shut the door.

“Did you hurt him?” Her voice was muffled by the blanket she pulled up to her nose.

“I promised I would not,” he said in calm, low tone. He cupped her chin with a light touch and kissed the top of her head. Damon dropped on to the bed and sighed. “Euron would never let me hurt him anyhow. Lord Theon seems rather miserable about it. He must think me a hypocrite but you aren’t just a woman. You are so lovely and sweet.”

“I hurt like any other woman,” she murmured. “When you are low born and men find you pretty, each day seems fraught with danger. He has protected me, as he tried to with you. I know should be grateful and that many other women have suffered far worse… and yet… it’s my body. The only thing I have ever owned.”

Damon jumped up. “Should I kill him? I will!”

“No!” Gwyn laughed, surprising both of them. “Why, Ser, you are my knight!”

Damon smiled his boyish grin but it faded slowly. “Well… but how can I fix things for you?”

Gwyn approached him slowly. Hesitant but smiling she wrapped her arms around his waist. “You keep being silly and sweet and I will remain,” she giggled, “your sugar girl.”

Damon swooped her up with a smile that warmed her to her aching bones. She laughed and pinched his nose then kissed his soft mouth.


	18. Monster from the Deep

Ramsay stormed into the boy’s room like thunder, slamming the door shut behind him. He didn’t bother to look like Euron, he was in the tower and the boy wasn’t stupid. That is exactly why he is here. This little fucker, the little shit that he would dearly love to strangle and let the ocean take him.

For whatever reasons, Theon likes this boy and Ramsay needs to keep him around and alive. Theon cannot stand to see the boy hurt but every time the boy opens his mouth it is an invite to hurt him. However, Ramsay is desperate. This boy is only loyal to Theon and Ramsay knows threatening or hurting Severin won’t change that. For that alone he hates him and needs him.

Because Theon is going to try everything he can to drink. He will concoct crazy schemes, he will cause himself harm if he must to get a sip more. Ramsay needs to make sure those closest to Theon will keep this from happening. Soon enough, Theon will try and charm Severin into getting him a bottle. Ramsay needs to enlist the boy’s help before Theon gets to him.

Standing over the little arrogant brat, Ramsay stares down then gets a stool to sit on, just before the boy. He clasps his hands together and smirks. “Well then, I think it's time you and I had a little talk, don’t you?”

“Yes!” Severin sneered leaning forward. “You need someone to help you pack? I am so happy to help.”

Ramsay wanted to flay maybe just one finger, a little one off the insolent cunt. Surely Theon would understand if it was only a single digit? Taking a deep breath, Ramsay leaned forward to match stares. “No. I won’t be leaving. If I ever do, I will be taking Theon with me. He is mine, haven’t you figured it all out yet?” He sneered. He really didn’t mean to actually pull the flaying knife out of his pocket but it felt better in his hand. Twirling it along his fingers, Ramsay grinned and said, “Go on, boy, tell me your theories. Who am I, what am I doing here and why? Dying to hear it.”

Severin balled his small fists. “You are the man who gives him nightmares. You tortured him on the mainland. He is mine. You can have anyone but he's all I have and I will die to keep him safe.” Tears began to sting his eyes. It wasn’t fair that he was so small still.

Ramsay chuckled and shook his head. “Oh, look at you! All full of big ideas and anger but too tiny for it! He is mine, has been for a very long time. I did torture him once, that is true, for a while. Then our relationship slowly changed. I am a monster, yes. But I am his monster and he likes it, loves me and I love him. We will never be apart again. I am not here to take over, you idiotic little brat. I am here to be with him, to help Theon rule and be healthy, safe and loved. By me. By you and by his people.”

Suddenly Ramsay pointed the blade at Severin as he leaned further closer. “You aren’t making things any easier for him. He doesn’t need you to keep being a little shit. You spout your mouth off enough at my boys, they will knock your teeth out. You should take more care. Your King is very sick and I am trying to help him. Perhaps you should get off your pedestal long enough to notice it.”

“What do you mean. .. he's sick?” Severin’s hands relaxed and his shoulders slumped.

Ramsay lost his grin and let his real worry peek through for a second. “Theon has   been sick for a very long time. He was ill when I first met him and now here it is again. Haven’t you noticed how his behavior can change so swiftly? From cheerful and japing, to cold and arrogant, to throwing up and shaking? Ever notice that a bottle or a little extra in his mug brings forth these things? Theon cannot stop drinking on his own, when he does drink, it makes him sick. It controls him far worse than I ever did. It is going to kill him if we cannot help him. And I do mean we. I hate you, you hate me but we both love Theon. It is up to us to save him. Will you help me in this one thing?”

It killed Ramsay to be so charming, so nice to this little puke, but he had no choice. “He will try and sneak liquor every chance he gets. He will harass anyone that he thinks can get him a drink. I will be giving him enough for him not to go into the shakes, but he has to be weaned off it slowly.  It will get worse before it gets better. You may be shocked to discover a whole new side to him. Will you help me keep Theon safe while we wean him?”

Severin’s eyes had grown wide. “I will! I'll do everything  in in my power, I swear it, my lord.”

Ramsay smiled with true relief. “Thank you, Severin. If we can work together, I can offer you more freedom. Use it wisely, use it to help your Lord. I need someone to help me search the tower for hidden bottles. You know him well, as you have said. I bet if anyone can find those secret stashes of poison, it is you. As long as you do not leave this tower without one of my boys or your Lord, you may have free rein. Now, please search out those bottles with me?” He gave his most charming, earnest look and took the boy’s hand.

They searched together and came up with more stashes than Ramsay had thought there would be. Grimly, Ramsay said, “This is the last of them but Theon will go crazy trying to get more. He will try to persuade you with everything he has, he might get angry and verbally or even physically hurt you. As we wean him down more and more he will get more sick...then slowly, then faster, he will get well. We have to remember that when he seems to turn on us. And he will.”

 

Theon had been pacing from the balcony to the fireplace and back again. He splashed water on his face and wiped away the water and sweat. He shook his head and sighed then used the washing bowl to put out the fire.

Skinner greeted Alyn with a slight nod. “Theon’s uncle wants to see him. He says there’s a meeting… people want to bitch at him. I dunno.”

“Heh.” Skinner went to wrap on his door. “Theon.” He waited for an answer. None came. “Theon!” He frowned and went to open the door but it didn’t budge. Suddenly, his twisting stomach dropped. “THEON!” The handle jiggled easily but the door wouldn’t budge. “REEK! YOU OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR RIGHT NOW!” He pulled and kicked at it until it swung away. He stumbled into the dark room.

“What?” Theon groaned behind the door.

“What? What the fuck was that? You cannot lock this door if you are in here alone!”

“But… oh.” He sank against the wall. “Right, yes. I’m sorry.”

Skinner looked Reek over. He had a strange look on his face; detached yet resolute, he did seem made of iron then. Skinner backed into the lit hallway.

“Well? What is it?”

“Your uncle wants you… for a meeting.”

Theon sighed. “Where’s Ramsay?” In the dark Skinner could see Theon’s long thin hands wrap around his scarred shoulders. “I imagine he would rather I did not go without him.”

“It Is time to go anyhow. He will meet up with us in the great hall.” Skinner backed up and let Reek creep out of his room and silently lead the way.

 

In the busy hall Theon squinted against the light. Each candle seemed to prick his eyes. Every noise was a dagger.

“Well?”

He looked up from the hole in his fingers. “What?”

His uncle Rodrick sighed. “You’re uncle Aeron was like this, and your father once.”

“I don’t give a shit about the fucking Greyjoys.” He stopped himself curling his fingers nails into the table. “What did you want again?”

“You must hold court to hear trials and grievances, Theon. It is your duty. No longer will they wait for you sister. I am sorry, but I believe we both know she is not coming back.”

Theon rubbed his eyes and swallowed. His hand was so unsteady. All his taut muscles ached with a static energy. It felt as though each strip of meat inside was fighting against him. He wanted to run and he wanted to sleep, but he could do neither and sitting her while his uncle droned on was unbearable. “No one knows where she may be. I haven’t given up yet,” he tried to say calmly. His head jerked suddenly. “Who said that?”

“Said what?” Alyn asked cautiously leaning slightly away from him.

Theon only shook his head and hid his eyes in his palm. “Your father would hear voices, Theon. You’re uncle Aeron would think-”

“I AM NOT MY FATHER!” Theon was on his feet roaring. His own voice echoed painfully in his head. He leaned on the table, staring at his hands. “Uh, I didn’t… I forgot my gloves.” He jerked back up to standing and fell miserably into his chair. “Boy,” he snapped his fingers at thrall. “Get me cloth, would you?”

Rodrick held up his hand to stop the boy and offered his kerchief. “You must have that meeting, Theon. Tomorrow.”

Theon snatched the cloth and wiped his brow and neck.

Ramsay swept into the room like a black nightmare and carelessly threw himself into a chair next to Theon. He took one look at his pet and knew he had fucked up. He let Theon go too long without a drink. Theon looked like hell, like he was about to collapse. Sweat poured off of him and he was twitching. It was watching Theon back in Dreadfort all over again. Except this time Theon was tortured on his very own cross.

Feeling a terrible sense of guilt that he tried so hard to hide behind a smirk, Ramsay pulled out the flask. “Theon, here. Sip at it. Only small sips, do you hear me? I am going to order you a mug of your rum. Remember, we are in public, you have to maintain control. Sip only and your drink is coming. Hang on for me. You can do this.” Ramsay spoke very quietly into the shaking pet’s ear. Then he handed over the flask while signaling a thrall to get Lord Theon’s special mug.

Theon snatched the flask like the was stealing it and worked his trembling hands to open it.

“Euron,” Rodrick said coldly. Then he peered closer. He smiled slightly and looked to Theon who winked as he downed some whiskey. He sounded a bit like Theon when he said, “Oh.” Rodrick clasped his hands behind his back. “Would you make our nephew attend to his duties, old friend?”

Theon groaned and gave Ramsay the flask back. “Thank you,” he whispered.

Ramsay gave a slight nod to Reek then coldly looked over at the elderly man with bushy eyebrows. They were huge and looked like they were trying to leave his face. With a confident grin on his face, eye twinkling merrily, Ramsay declared, “Why of course he should attend his duties. Our King should not shirk his duties, he must be here for his people. There is nothing that Theon wants more than to care properly for his subjects. Which duty are we discussing at the moment?”

Ramsay was deliberately leaning past Theon, trying to give him the moment to drink and compose himself. He tried to keep the attention on him. “Anything but marriage is on the table for a duty...so which one is it?”

Rodrick smiled flatly, but his eyes were kind. He lowered his voice and stepped closer to Ramsay. “He must attend a meeting at noon tomorrow to hear trials and settle grievances. He should be doing it at least twice a week, but keeps putting it off in hopes that his sister would return and do the thing for him.” Rodrick looked at the deep blue crescent around Theon’s narrowed, darting eye. “If I can help you,” he said to Ramsay, looking somewhat depressed, “let me know. He should see his poor mother if and when he gets better.”

Theon moaned and stood. “Yes, we’ll see. Thank you.” He pulled at the neck of his jerkin and removed his cloak. “I’m not hungry.”

Ramsay saw the drink coming and pulled Theon back into his chair. “Wait, here it comes, you can sit and drink it slowly. Carefully. Try to breathe through this. Just a little longer, my love, you are doing so well, good boy.” He whispered to Theon, his breath tickling his hair. He put an arm around him tightly as if to help contain the storm. To hold him against the painful wave full of sea salt and sand to scour at Theon’s nerve endings. As if the very air was flaying him, that is how Theon acted and Ramsay drowned in guilt. He never meant to let Reek get that sick.

He looked over Theon’s head to Rodrick, his features as grave as the man’s was. Softly he spoke. “Theon has mentioned that he wishes to see his mother soon. Once he is feeling a little stronger, a bit better we shall go. I promised him already. It might do him, them both, some good. I appreciate the offer and will let you know if I need any help. I have seen this before and many of my own men had fallen prey to this sickness. I will help him through it. Our King will be stronger than ever when he is no longer…”

Ramsay stopped himself and just gave a sharp nod to Rodrick. “It hurts to see my own nephew go through such a thing. I am glad that I am here to help him. And he will be at the court tomorrow, I will attend with him to assist. Just until he gets the idea of how to do it correctly of course.”

He spoke with thick clipped words as if trying to hide great emotion. He wanted everyone to know that Euron had a very special relationship with his nephew. And he wanted as many that he could trust here, to help with Theon without spreading rumors or getting nervous.   

Rodrick nodded. “It runs on his father’s- your side, you know. The other... ailments come from the Harlaws, so I have also-”

“Please. Stop.” Theon growled.

Rodrick turned away from Theon to face Ramsay. “There are some books I could have sent over which I have found-”

Theon slammed his knife into the table. “Stop talking! Your voice is making me ill.” He pulled back into his chair, gritting his teeth. “I’m sorry. Please, excuse me.” Theon leaned over to Ramsay. “I feel sick. I want to lay in the dark where it’s quiet. Or walk… I don’t know. No, I need to be alone in my room.”

Ramsay pulled Theon up and then grabbed the mug that took so long to get to him. He glared at the thrall and hissed, “The next time I ask you to get something you best move as if you are on fire. Because otherwise, you will feel my wrath. Hear me?” Casting a glance over to Rodrick, he said, “I will get him to his room and care for him. He will be there tomorrow and look better than this, I swear it.”

He supported Theon until they got out of the room then he snapped for Skinner to get on the other side of the sick boy. “Help me, I can’t carry him until we get to the tower.” Ramsay felt it was the longest time of his life, trying to make it to the tower with his poor pet falling apart so fast.

As soon as they were out of sight of others, Ramsay stopped and put the mug to Theon’s lips. “Here, drink. Go ahead, sweetling, I can see how badly you need it. It is alright, Reek, go on and have some..quickly, you have to walk to the tower. Others could come by any second, my love. Be a good boy for me and pretend just a little longer. We are almost there. Don’t guzzle it but here I am going to hold it for you, see? Now take a sip, now another, good boy.” Ramsay was beyond scared for his pet. “Alyn, get the maester to meet us in the tower. Hurry.”    

“Thank you.” His teeth were chattering but already his acid stomach was warming and his muscled eased. His head bobbed and he walked on with Ramsay. “Everything hurts. Thinking hurts. I cannot…” his shaking eased and he lost his train of thought. “I’m frightened. What if I make you hate me?”

“That will never happen, my good boy. Not ever. Sweetheart, Reek never touched a drop of liquor, did he? But just before Reek was created..there was a small space of time that you were sober Theon. After the terrible pain of it..you had a small point where you were clear, you looked better. And you must remember that feeling of freedom, of relief to be freed of it. Do you recall that? Sip slower, Reek. Good boy, we must keep walking now. That is alright, you may have the last of it. All gone? Let’s keep walking, almost there, see?”

He coaxed his shaking poor Reek to walk between Skinner and himself to get to the tower. “I swear Reek, I didn’t know it was too long for you, my love. I won’t make that mistake again, Reek. The maester is coming to see you and then I will create a schedule for your drinks. A better one so you will not get this sick. Good boy, here we are, the tower.”

Ramsay lifted his pet into his arms and carried him into the tower, up to their chambers.

 

Theon sat up in bed. He couldn’t be sure how long he had slept or even if he had. It didn’t look as though much time had passed. With his pain largely cleared away he could think much better. “No! Please! No maester! Don’t tell anyone! Don’t tell people I … it’s fine we’ll just go slower and it will be fine. No one should know. They can’t.” His heart still fluttered and his breathing quickened. “I cannot do this with you, Ramsay. I will lose control. I will try to make you hate me so that you’ll leave me be. It’s too dangerous. I cannot hurt you. That I will not live with.”

Ramsay shook his head and tried to rub his pet’s back but Reek pulled away from him. “Listen, nothing you can do will ever make me hate you. Ever. You are not dangerous, not to me. You are ill and I want to help you. If you get worse I will bring the maester.”

Theon’s chambers never seemed so small. Why were there no windows? He couldn’t breath. “I have to…” Shut up, shut up, he told himself. He knows when you’re lying. Theon whined and clutched his chest. He almost asked for more, but he didn’t need more. He didn’t really need it at all… only just to calm down... to think. He was muttering to himself, chanting under his breath as he hid under his legs and arms, curled up on their bed. “I need to be alone.”

Ramsay was slightly hurt that his pet wanted him to leave. After all, Reek usually turns to Ramsay to fix whatever is wrong. He would usually beg for his Master to comfort him. Then his eyes narrowed and he grabbed Reek’s chin turning him to see those eyes. “You don’t want me to leave because you think you have some extra bottles, do you? There is nothing left in here. But if you want me to go, I will, love. Try and rest. Skinner will stay right outside the door. If you need anything, have him come get me.” He kissed his pet, then went to find the maester. He had many questions.

 

After standing around staring at the stone brick walls a while, Skinner decided to make sure the creepy fucker hadn’t locked the door.

He slid into the dark and peered around. “Reek?” Skinner padded the desk by the door for a match and candle but found nothing to help light the room. “Reek? Where are you?”

The door shut, ushering out the only light with a slam.

“Ay, what-” Skinner was brought down with one well placed hit to the back of his head.

“Sorry.”

 

Theon peeked out into the hall, standing back from the open door. The light hurt the back of his eyes.

 

Severin woke up with a cough. He wiped drool from his mouth and pulled his head from a warm shoulder. He was wrapped in the blanket Theon had made specially for him, lightly bouncing against a chest. “What are you doing?”

“Shh.” Theon patted his head. “Go back to sleep.”

“Where are we?” His voice echoed in the stark on stop of Theon’s soft footsteps. There was only a small sphere of light around them, all else was cold and black. “What do you mean to do with me?” he insisted.

Theon sniffed and grumbled, clearing his thick throat. “We have to leave.”

“We cannot! You have to get better!”

Theon came to a halt. “If I fight this thing alongside him, one of us will die. I’ve already hurt him though I haven’t yet lost control. It won’t be long before destroy him then he me. There is no happy ending but one way out in a short window of time.”

 

Ramsay knocked on the maester’s door then entered. He explained Theon’s illness and made sure to have the maester write down every possible remedy to try. Then Ramsay made sure to threaten the man within an inch of his life to keep the secret. Clutching the note hard, Ramsay headed to Balon’s old chamber.

 

Sitting at the large stone desk, Ramsay reread the list over and over. He was warned how sick his pet can become if weaned too quickly. He was warned that it was difficult to wean someone from bottle sickness. That Theon will change quickly, he will become desperate, he might even become dangerous.

Carefully, Ramsay set down the note and began to walk the room. Then with a roar of fury, he attacked the picture. Using fingers and nails that were hooked like claws, Ramsay ripped through the image of Balon Greyjoy. “Even now, you fucker? You can’t just keep hurting him! Let him go, you cunt!” Ramsay destroyed the picture then knelt in the destruction, to pretend he wasn’t crying.

 

Skinner groaned and felt the small lump on his head. “Oh that little fucker!” he snarled, then winced at the pain in his head. Slowly, he stood up and staggered for a moment. As soon as Skinner got his balance, headed down the hall. Reek was running again, Skinner grinned meanly. Ramsay can’t let this one go, he will have to punish the little fucker. He will have to see Skinner was right all along. Just a little bitch that can’t rule even himself. On the other hand, Ramsay will take it out on Skinner if Reek manages to escape or gets injured. With a sigh and a pained moan, Skinner headed for the little whipping brat’s room. Of course Reek would take the boy with him. He started to run.

   

As soon as a door creaked and crunched slowly open, Severin began to struggle. He felt the wind and heard the smooth, gentle, lapping of harbor waves. “You’re sailing! Where will you go?”

“We’ll stop to entreat upon my aunt to rescue…” Theon rubbed his face and moaned. “It will be alright. We’ll head South. I will write to explain… I’ll fix myself my own way. It will be fine." _I don't need to give up drinking, just get things under control. We can meet as equals, he will forgive me. I have to protect him._

Severin started kicking and thrashing.

"What are you doing? Stop! Don’t be afraid.”

“I AM NOT AFRAID! I was charged with a most important task!”

“What? Severin, stop!” Theon lost his footing in the wet sand and stumbled forward. “Please don’t fight me. I have no patience. THERE IS NO TIME FOR GAMES!” Theon rolled on top of Severin who’d wrestled his way nearly out of the blanket. He pinned the boy by his shoulders. “Do. NOT. Fight. Me. I can’t-”

“I know. He told me everything and he was right! He explained why you have these moods and it is NOT because of me!” Severin’s brave face glistened in the setting sun. “It’s not because I am too loud, or because I forgot something you _didn’t_ ask for! You want to coddle me like I’m a baby, you overturn your table and scream at me, you tell me to leave you constantly then tell me I am special and you have taken me as your son! If I am your son, if you care for me, why won’t you get better?” Severin took off running as Theon knelt dumbly.

He fell onto his hands and panted, spinning but not really thinking anything. He could only see his father.

Leaving the bags he had brought. He looked to the pink sky growing dark. Then to the tower holding all he cared about. He never felt so much like poison and started walking to the sea.

   

Damon got out of bed when he heard yelling. Opening his door he found the source of the commotion further down the rocky, grass-spiked dunes. “I will return shortly,” he said softly, but Gwyn was slumbering, nestled deep in warm blankets. Damon huffed and took his whip, cloak, and boots to go out into the bitter wind.

He saw Reek walking alone and quickened his pace. Where did the boy go? Damon nearly caught his foot on a burlap bag that had been left in the sand. From the opening he could just make out gloves, a locket of hair, a pocket mirror and a black bottle. Theon’s silhouette drifted past the docs and began to sink below the horizon.

“Stop!” Damon sprinted down the beach.

 

“Wait!” Severin came sprinting after Ramsay. He couldn’t speak clearly or hardly catch his breath. “I tried to stop him! I told him not to leave.” An aching pain broke through his hot frustration. “He’s always leaving. I just want him to stay normal and be my friend.” His strength exhausted, Severin hugged Ramsay’s leg and broke under everything.

Ramsay looked down at the boy clinging to his leg and tried to hide his fear. He did not grab the boy by the throat and demand information. No, he put his hand gently on the child’s head and tried to soothe him. “Once we get him well, he won’t want to leave anymore. And he will be your friend, he is already...just a sick one. Now, tell me where he is so I can fetch him back.”

Severin sniffed and said, “Down the beach. He was going to kidnap me and sail away us to his aunt. He says that he will hurt you if he stays.” Forcing himself to stay calm, Ramsay said, “Thank you, Severin. You have done excellent work today. I will run and get Theon.” Gently extracting his leg from the boy, Ramsay ran towards the beach, his heart pounding.  

 

Damon swore as the thin figure began to walk into the ocean, ignoring his hollering. He put on a burst of speed and managed to drag Theon backwards just as his head began to sink under the waves. Dumping the pale coughing man to the sand, Damon knelt next to him. “What the hell was that? What were you thinking?” Damon took off his cloak and wrapped it around the shivering Theon. “What happened that made you do that? Nothing can be that bad, Theon.”

Theon stared in a daze. “What are you thinking? You hate me. Damon, by the gods, you didn't have to see me. Don't you understand? Just let me go. You didn't see me, why would you?” Damon leaned back in the sand and reflected Theon’s bewildered expression back to him. “We want the same thing; to protect Ramsay and Gwyn...and yourself. It’s alright.” Theon smiled gently. “Let go. Go back and take care of them.” Theon nodded slowly and sat up.

Damon stared at Theon and shook his head. “This is how you think to protect Ramsay and Gwyn? If you die, Ramsay will burn this entire place to the ground with him in it. Do you know how devastated he was when you left him? He couldn’t care less if Sansa lived or died, but you..you was all he could think of. And as for Gwyn, if the King isn’t here to protect her and the others, what would happen? How is this saving anyone? And I don’t hate you, I was mad at you. Learn the difference, Theon. You are sick really sick. You need to go back inside now.”

In spite of the flailing, Damon overpowered the sick man easily and lifted him. ”I don’t hate you, I like you. You are good for Ramsay, he is good for you, like me an’ Gwyn. You match together. But you need to get better, I have seen men fall to the bottle like this, Theon. It isn’t pretty, some die of it. You need to let someone help you, buddy.”

 

Ahead, Skinner was running towards them but Damon shook his head at him. Theon curled tighter against Damon. Looking at Skinner, Damon said, “I got him. I’ll bring him to his chambers. Why don’t you let Ramsay know I have him?”

Snarling, Skinner replied, “I have to stay with the little cunt. What was that all about, trying to escape again, right? I knew it! Ramsay will see now!”

  
Damon glared at Skinner and sneered, “You don’t know shit. Theon is really sick. He wandered off in a fever down to the beach. He almost drowned, you asshole!”

Skinner paled but then spit out, “He hit me in the head! He wasn’t too sick to do that!” Damon grunted and carried Theon into the keep.


	19. Which Monster is to Blame?

Ramsay stood at the water’s edge and stared out. The beach was deserted, the boat was empty, where was he? He stared at the waves and then felt overwhelming terror and desolation. Screaming Theon’s name, he plunged into the cold water, searching, afraid to find a bloating corpse. He almost didn’t hear Gwyn hollering to him. “My Lord! Damon saved Lord Theon from the ocean. He carried him to the keep!”

 

He ran past her barely able to say thanks, nearly out of his mind. Theon really did try to run, then kill himself when running was no longer an option. Ramsay felt betrayed, he felt manipulated and most of all he felt scared. Out of control and scared which always made him angry. I shouldn’t go near Reek yet, I should stay away. But he couldn’t, Ramsay had to see him, had to see that his beloved pet was really safe and back where he should be. He will just have to keep his temper no matter what.

 

He was told to sit by the fireplace. He pushed himself as far as he could into the wall and hid behind his shaking limbs, chanting under his breath. Damon remembered this; Reek. It felt like seeing an old friend, and somehow that made him sad.

“What?” Skinner snapped at Reek, disappointed when he didn’t jump.

He mumbled something, and Damon recognized his name at the end. He came closer and leaned down, warmed by the fire. “What’s that?”

“Please don’t leave.”

Skinner snorted. “I thought you wanted to die.”

Reek shook his hidden head. “You could never understand.”

“Things get better,” Damon attempted to remind him.

Reek looked up with large, red and hollow eyes. “What could possibly make you think so?”

Ramsay slammed open the door and stormed in. Soaked, freezing and desperate, he saw the Boys standing over Reek. Shuddering, trying hard to breathe, Ramsay shut the door then leaned against it. “Where did you find him?” he asked tonelessly.

Skinner had a bright grin. “When his boy ran, he decided not to sail away. Damon fished him out of the ocean where he was trying to drown.”

Damon swore and glared at Skinner. “He hadn't done it yet, Ramsay. He was only walking in the water when I pulled him out. He was safe the whole time, I had him.”  

The reassurances were not enough and Ramsay saw red flowers of rage bloom across his vision. His cold body was suddenly hot with volcanic rage. He drew his flaying knife and headed for the huddled figure in front of the fireplace.

“ _No, no, please_! I was only trying to cure myself as my uncle Aeron did! Please, you misunderstand me!” Reek sobbed quaking under him.

Damon stepped between them. “Ramsay, let's have a seat, yeah?”

For a brief moment, Ramsay almost attacked the closest thing he had to a best friend. Reek was safe, he was here and that was all that mattered. He looked at the flaying knife in his hand then put it away. _I made a promise, I have to keep it, I made a promise, I have to keep it._ This mantra sang in his head as he threw himself into a chair, staring moodily into the fireplace. “You ran from me. You lied and you ran from me. Tried to sail, tried to drown yourself and I am supposed to be patient and understanding? Fuck you, Theon.” He spat bitterly.

“I’m sorry… I… I wasn’t trying to kill myself. My uncle was sick, as you say I am. He was drowned and reborn. All his crimes, regrets, nightmares… they stayed in the sea.”

Ramsay didn’t mean to yell. “YOU ARE NOT YOUR UNCLE OR YOUR FATHER OR ANY OF THEM! STOP TRYING TO BE!” It took everything not to fling himself from the chair to attack. “I am trying to help you. I am doing everything I can for you and how do you repay me? You run. You grab your little boy and set sail. As sick as you are, you would have either drowned or crashed on some rock somewhere. And that is fine with you. It never occurs to you what that would do to me, you selfish prick.” Ramsay was starting to get enraged again and threw himself out of his chair to pace the room.

“Ramsay… no one destroyed me like my father. It would be better if you let me go. Please fucking believe me, you don’t understand what’s going to happen to me. There is no good ending to this.”

That was all Ramsay could take and he rushed towards Theon, bellowing in rage. “You want to be a martyr? You want to suffer for your family, you want to be the enemy still and the victim? Fine, we can do that then!” This time his knife was out and he was ready to use it, all sense having fled with Theon’s words.

“Ramsay!” Damon brought to his barrel chest. He looked to Skinner in a panic. “ _Help me!_ ”

“ _I’m_ trying to protect _you_! You don’t fucking understand that! Just LEAVE! I wouldn’t be this fucked up if it wasn’t for you! TAKE THE FUCKING MONEY! I was FINE before you got here!”

“SHUT UP!” Damon screamed.

Theon pointed to himself with a shaking hand. “LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO ME!”

Ramsay screamed in rage, fighting against Damon’s arms. “YOU WERE FINE? _FINE_? YOU UNGRATEFUL LITTLE SHIT! I AM GOING TO FLAY YOU UNTIL YOU FUCKING BEG ME TO FORGIVE YOU!” Skinner was cackling now at Damon’s struggle to keep Ramsay in check. “Let him go. Take care of the little fucker once and for all. Ramsay won’t kill him, he didn’t in the past. He’ll just put him back in place, make him lose a bit more pieces.” Skinner advised in between gales of laughter.

“Thanks! Cheers, Skinner! God damn it!” Damon tried to swing Ramsay away and squeezed him tighter, hoping the bear hug would make him pass out or at least slow down. “Don’t, don’t, this is what happens. Ramsay, did you talk to the maester? Come on, talk to me not him. GET HIM OUT OF HERE, SKINNER!”

“ _Ungrateful_? Fuck you! I gave you _everything_! I could have had you killed! I could have killed you so many times! You don’t want me to be a Greyjoy?”

“STOP HIS MOUTH, SKINNER!”

“You don’t want Reek because you need a king but you don’t want a king really because you need Reek and you want me to be myself, I person I _never_ had! A person YOU obliterated slice by slice." Theon fell back, shivering into his corner. "Find another toy.”

Only when Ramsay became silent and pale with fury and started to go very still as if waiting, did Skinner grow nervous. “Alright, Reek shut the fuck up now.” He grabbed onto the brat’s thin arm and said, “Tell you what, if you can shut your mouth, I’ll take you for a pint myself, right?” He said rather chummily to Theon as he felt Ramsay’s eyes land on him.

Theon nodded eagerly, submitting in instant. He ground his teeth not to beg, because Skinner said to be quiet and he could not afford to fuck this up. When he tried to stand, he started gagging.

“Get him out!” Damon rasped.

Ramsay suddenly lunged and nearly broke through Damon’s grip. “REEK! YOU APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT YOU SAID! DON’T YOU DARE LEAVE THIS ROOM TO GO HAVE A FUCKING DRINK! APOLOGIZE TO ME!” He tried to slam his head backwards, hoping to shatter a bone in Damon’s face but he was too damned short. His head did hit hard into Damon’s clavicle bruising it. Skinner tried to get a good grip on Theon to drag him out the door.

Theon seemed to ghost back into himself for an instant, in some strange way. He looked to Skinner but as the door was open he cried out, “I’M SORRY! I’m sorry!” He started crying miserably. “Please, I just need one more,” he couldn’t make himself wait until he was out of Ramsay’s sight to beg. He was sick and hollow, every sense he had was trying to kill him. He couldn’t stop the tremors racing through his throbbing body. _“I’ll do anything,_ ” he whispered.

Ramsay roared in rage again struggling hard against Damon. “YOU DO ANYTHING AND I WILL CASTRATE YOU!” Skinner dragged Theon out of the room and slammed shut the door. “LET ME GO, DAMON!” Ramsay screamed, thrashing.

“No, Ramsay! It’s alright! It’s alright now. Skinner wouldn’t… I’m sure he didn’t even mean that. GOD DAMN IT, STOP!” Damon’s arms were starting to quake from the strain. He slowly worked his right arm up, one jerk at a time and slid Ramsay’s neck into the crook of his arm so he could squeeze the sides. _It’s like when that little asshole left all over again. Thanks a lot fuckfaces, I’ll just stay here with the mess you made and try not to die._ “I’ll help you, Ramsay. We’ll fix it, I promise.”

He was losing breath and he knew Damon would choke him out if need be. Trying to force himself to calm, Ramsay snarled out, “Don’t fucking strangle me, Damon! I am calming down, I won’t skin him. At least not yet. I know Skinner won't...at least I hope he wouldn’t.” Ramsay was tense but he was no longer fighting in Damon’s arms. “I don’t know if I can do this, Damon. If this is how he will be, if it gets even worse like the maester said it will…” Ramsay sagged in Damon’s arms then and swore bitterly as tears filled his eyes.

Damon sat on the bed but he wouldn’t let Ramsay go. He pressed his cheek into Ramsay’s thick hair. “You know you’re soaking wet and ice cold? Ramsay… you did it before. Hey, if you can’t, and maybe shouldn’t, I will. You know you can trust me. I’d risk my life for you. I have. I just did! Right?” Damon smiled, looking down on his hot little head. God damn he was so full of fire. Damon rubbed his face into Ramsay’s hair a little with a sad smirk. “I’m right here.”

Trying to breathe slower, Ramsay blinked away his tears and nodded. “I know. You are always here for me. My best companion. I don’t know what I would do without you. I...you might be right. I don’t think it’s safe right now for me to be alone with Theon unless I gag him or remove his tongue. Reek is not going to be appearing on his own anytime soon probably. I need to get him through tomorrow. He must show to court, we can keep him soused just enough to get him past that. Then we need to truly dry him out. And he will open his mouth and I will flay him if I am not careful.”

“Right. Once he's no longer sick with need, reassert yourself in ways you won't regret. Help him make an appearance and then we shall get to the thing.  We’ll make a room for it. I won't let you down. Reek is still there. It's not too late, not at all.”

Taking a deep breath Ramsay nodded. “I can’t give up on him. I love him, I really do, Damon. I’ll never let him control me and I’ll always..be me. But I do love him and don’t want to hurt him, at least not like I used to. Help me with this, you’ve got to. Start by hiding every blade I own.” Ramsay said, half joking.

 

“Give it to me.”

“Good morning, Theon.” Alyn replied bitterly. He jerked away when the thin Lord came near.

“Do you have it or not?”

“I have it. I heard you were fine before we came… is that true?”

“Yeah. I wasn’t like _this_! I had everything under control… about to be under control and now look at me!” Theon looked around at the dark empty room the moved him to. Dry bile splattered on the floor by his bed. A chain on his ankle tethered him to the wall. Hurry up, come on.”

“Tell me you’re sick and you need help.”

“Fuck yourself. I don’t understand this new jape you all are playing at. I have seen you kill defenseless people. I have watched you hand over naked, sobbing, girls pleading for their lives to Ramsay for his hunts. Now I am made to bel- where are you going!” Theon lunged forward, stopped by his chained ankle.

“I’m not listening to horseshit.”

“YOU have to get ME ready for the.... that meeting!” Alyn stepped into the hall and began to shut the door. “No, no, wait! Fine! I’m sick. I need help.”

“I don’t believe you,” Alyn said flatly from the hall.

“Why are you doing this?” Theon cried desperately.

Alyn looked away and lowered his voice. “Someone did it for me.”

Theon sat on the floor. He wiped his forehead with his shaking hand. “I wasn’t good before you came. I had to drink to be the person my sister needed. I didn’t stop hurting, I didn’t stop regretting or living in fear for a moment since I left Winterfell unless I was drinking. That was the only time I didn’t hate myself and everything about my life, but it doesn’t do that anymore. It just stops me from dying a terrible death. I don’t even like t anymore or who I am drunk. I’m just terrified to be sober and unable to stop. It will kill me.”

Alyn rolled the bottle over to him. “Try to eat at this meeting. Drink some water.” Alyn left and Skinner came in escort him.

 

Theon sat in between Damon and Alyn. He still couldn’t relax, but there weren’t embers crawling beneath his skin like roaches. He could think more clearly and wished for death again. Alyn cleared his throat and pushed a glass of water to him. Theon tried to drink some. It tasted like vomit.

 

Ramsay took a deep breath and threw on Euron like a coat. He entered the room as if he owned it. No one would ever know that Ramsay spent half the night weeping and raging on Damon . If anyone had seen it, Ramsay would have ripped out their tongue, removed their eyes and ears, then flayed them living. They slept little and poor Gwyn slept alone.

His gaze went straight to Theon and he forced himself to harden his concerns. The words that came from his mouth, it was all Theon and none of Reek. He isn’t lost forever, just hiding underneath layers of Theon. Removing the bottle removes that layer that needs to be ripped away to find the real person. Ramsay flayed plenty of flesh, but flaying the mind is delicate. And this time, it would bring no joy to do it, in fact, this time, Ramsay cannot do it himself. He cannot do this alone. Just like Theon cannot stop drinking alone.

Sitting down next to Damon, Euron greeted his nephew then he turned to Damon. “He is still shaky, too shaky. You need to let him have more than that or he won’t make it. He is in clear pain, fix it Call for his special mug that Gwyn used to bring him.” Ramsay ordered.

“Ramsay…” Alyn almost interjected but thought better of it, “I’ll get it.”

Theon stared at his plate. It all looked horrible. He knew he should say something but he couldn’t think straight. “I’m sorry,” he whispered to Ramsay.

Ramsay looked over at his suffering pet and nodded. “I know you are, I know that you are sorry. You are always sorry, aren’t you sick of always being sorry? I love you, you know that don’t you? This is for your own good, my pet. And this time, I cannot be the one to do it, you know that. But that doesn’t mean I am not here for you. I will visit you, I will ask about you every second of the day. You know why it can’t be me.”

“Wait,” Theon leaned past Damon who put an arm up to block him. “ _What are you talking about?_ What are you going to do me?”

“Later,” Damon sneered.

“What are you doing, Damon?” He started to panic. “I can’t-”

“Look.” Alyn slammed a mug in front of him. “Here you are, your grace. More coming if you behave.”

Theon swallowed nervously and greedily snatched the mug away.

“My Lord,” a broad man with long braided hair approached Ramsay. “Will you see the first prisoner and hear the witnesses against them?” Girls came in and cleared their plates and bowls.

Ramsay looked over at Theon with an arched eyebrow then announced, “His Grace will see the prisoner but I will judge.” With a wide grin, he said to Damon, “I need a little release...don’t you think?” Nudging Damon, Ramsay sat straight in his chair and began to play with his flaying knife.

Damon grinned back at him. “Absolutely.”

“Very good. BRING HIM IN! This is Robert the Red, my Lords. He stands accused of taking Ironborn men’s wives and daughters against their will causing great injury and in one case abducting the rockwife of Harras Bartholomew. Will you hear the witnesses who have come to condemn him?” Three rows of people stood.

Euron stared at the man coldly and then nodded. “Yes, please bring them forth.” The whole time he continued to play with his blade, making sure the light glinted off of it.

“Your graces,” a woman said coming forward. “May the Drowned God bless you a hundred times over for hearing us. This man must needs be stopped. He took me from my Lord husband. He acted…” she stared at the dais, unable to face them as she went on, “as though he had been on a returned ship with my son. His… he was with the princess… Robert pretended to me that my son was waiting to be seen by a maester. He said-”

“Yes, yes, then what?” Alyn snapped impatiently. Theon gave him a worried look of warning.

“My Lady,” Theon said softly. “We hate to make you relive your ordeal. What is it you need to say?”

“My Lord husband was looking for me. I was bound by rope when he and my brothers found me in this man’s home. I can prove he wronged myself and my husband whom I love and never betrayed. His… his penis is curved to the left when erect. It’s disgusting,” tears came to her distant eyes, “and painful though it’s small,” she said bitterly.

Skinner leaned over to Ramsay. “I like her.” Alyn snorted.

WIth a smile full of sadistic joy, Ramsay leaned closer. “Well then, Robert! It seems like this can be solved easily. Simply pull down your breeches and let us all have a look. If your penis looks as disgusting as she says, we will know.”

Robert looked around the hall. He had a weaselly look about him. He was slightly taller than average but seemed always to hunch. A wicked smirk drew upon his face.

Damon whispered to Ramsay. “He’s fucking turned on, the fucking lunatic.”

Robert pulled down his breeches and swung his hips around, hoping everyone would see. “It’s not that small.” He leered at a girl in the front row. “Is it, love?”

“He’s flaccid!” One of the accusing women protested.

Ramsay gave a wicked chuckle and said, “Surely there is a single whore or thrall girl around that could help with that! I will give any thrall girl here her freedom to work only for me if she gives this creature a hand.” He announced grandly, his icy eye searching the room.

Theon tried pushing past Damon. “ _What are you doing? What do you need a girl for_?”

Damon shoved him back. “What say do you have over your _uncle’s_ affairs?”

Theon chugged his ale and slammed it on the dais motioning for a refill.

“I would, your Grace.” A tiny little thing with sleek fluid movements and sharp eyes came forward blushing. She bit her lip and smiled at Ramsay. Theon wished he wasn’t so fucking handsome and banged his mug again.

She recoiled at the sight of the accused but approached him bravely. She looked at Ramsay and licked her palm then, keeping both her eyes on his one, she worked the man into hardening.

“STOP!” He tried to pull away but was held by the prison guards. “I’m a holy man! You can’t have this whore violate me!”

“Ah!” The sleek thrall pulled her hand away. “It’s true! Look!”

Ramsay watched with intense concentration or so it seemed. He was more aware of Theon drowning his jealousy in the mug than he was the little slut working the rapist. “I see that we have a guilty rapist, not at all a holy man!” He boomed out and told the girl she had done well. “My dear girl, what is your name? Ah, never mind. We shall get to it. You are to be now known as my personal servant. Now move away from that nasty rapist, dear girl.” Ramsay thrilled knowing how upset Theon would be over his cooing to the little whore. He knew he shouldn’t antagonize his sick little pet, but he was truly hurt last night.

Now he turned full attention to the prisoner. Here was a chance to reduce this stress and a chance to make sure a lesson was learned by all. Standing to his full height, he began to slowly walk around the dais. “Robert the Red, I find you guilty of rape! Now, what to do with you? I find it pointless to stick you in a cell to rot, wasting our food and water on your worthless carcass. However, killing you wastes a life I may need someday for battle. What to do then with you? We simply cannot let you run around taking any female you want to fuck.” Ramsay made a show of trying to figure out the answer then turned suddenly to the man. He had a delighted look on his face as he declared, “I have the answer! Since it is mainly one part of you that caused the trouble...we shall simply remove that part!”

“NO! NO! NO! King Euron, please! Lord Theon, mercy! I beg of you!”

Theon pushed his chair out, shaking his head ‘no’.

Damon pushed his chair back. “You can’t leave,” he whispered.

“I can’t watch…” Theon’s voice quivered he started to climb out of his seat.

Alyn slammed his hands on the table and snatched a bottle of wine from a gaping thrall. “Sit down!” Alyn slid the bottle to him.

Theon sat and let Damon shove his chair back in. He took the bottle and nodded to Alyn.

Ramsay ignored all of Theon’s little outbursts, trusting his men to keep him in line. Grinning fiercely at the prisoner, the blue lips showed sharp teeth and his voice was dangerous. “Just for that insult alone, you should lose your cock and testicles. KING THEON has given me in charge of this court. Castration is the judgment.” Ignoring the pleas of the prisoner, Ramsay turned to the little whore. He told her exactly the type of knife he needed and told her to hurry.

There was great cheering in the hall, especially from the witnesses in the front. The Ironborn love strength without mercy. They loved their king and the show he was providing.

Theon shrank further. Alyn patted his back. “Take it easy and eat some bread.”

The lithe thrall in love with her King came running back. “Your Grace.” She offered the knives Skinner had supplied her.

With a warm smile to the girl, Ramsay took the knives. “Thank you, sweet thing. Go sit in a chair and rest those lovely legs of yours. A girl like you was never meant for running and fetching for everyone. No, I have a much better position for you. Go sit until I have need of you, sweetheart.” Ramsay used a low velvet voice and his eyes pierced hers.

Theon frowned bitterly, tapping the table. _I said I was sorry!_

Ramsay approached the squirming and now screaming prisoner. “Huh, not so hard now, though are you? And truly, those ladies were right, you are quite disgusting. So I will tell you what, here is some mercy. After your...alterations..you will only pay each victim a fourth of your pay. And you will have pay since you will be put on the next ship out. Every time you return alive, your pay will go to each girl or woman you have defiled. For the next two years. If you miss a payment or you try to escape your punishment, I will have you brought back in chains. You will have to choose which parts I will cut off you until you can’t do more than scream. Do you hear me? Good. Now...let us begin!”

Oh, it was amazing, the screaming, the thrashing, it was home. Ramsay was in his pure element and his hands knew their work. With a quick, graceful skill, he removed the man’s penis and the testicles. Then he cauterized the worst of the bleeding wounds, after having sent his little thrall to get the maester. “There, now we shan’t have any more trouble with you! The maester will tend to you, see that he receives proper care! After all, we need every able bodied man...even the gelded ones!”

Ramsay turned and went over to his shrinking pet. With gore streaked hands, he reached out to touch the mostly drunk boy. “I own you. No matter what roles we play. No matter how sick you are, no matter what you try and do or say, I own you. Reek. Theon. Are. Mine. I will be your only monster, pet.” With a flourish, Ramsay excused himself from the feast. Before he left he did say, “Your Grace, would you come with me and our men, please? You look tired.”

“Wha- but what about the others?” Theon protested.

“I can see to the rest,” Damon offered. “They’re only petty grievances.”

Theon gulped back the bile in his throat and stood to follow. Euron was getting cheers and applause as he left. Women were begging to kiss his hand. Theon hoped to make the distance out of the hall stretch on forever.

Ramsay walked ahead of Theon, not wanting to make him more nervous, not wanting him to ask anything yet. He didn’t say a word until they were in front of the room Theon was installed in earlier. Then as he opened the door, he spoke. “My love, this is going to be the hardest torture I have ever given you. I do it out of love, out of dedication and loyalty to you. You won’t see it that way now, but I hope you will soon. Weaning you slowly won’t work, I can see that now. Alyn and the maester have developed a plan for you. We can make the suffering eased much as possible. The maester left us poppy for when the pain is very bad, Theon. You won’t have to do this alone, we are all here to help you.” Ramsay waited for the explosion. Both Alyn and Skinner exchanged glances with each other and Ramsay.

“ _Please don’t do this_ ,” Theon dropped to his knees and begged sobbing. “Please, please! I’ll be good! I’ll be Reek! I’ll do anything! Anything! I’ll be good for you! I swear! Please,” he reached for Ramsay’s britches desperately. “I can make it better. I be good. I’ll show you please, Master. _I’ll die_! I’m sorry for what I did. I’ll make it up to you.”

Ramsay shook his head and blinked rapidly, swallowing past a lump in his throat. He grabbed Theon’s thin, sweaty and terrified face. “I love you, I swear I do and this isn’t because you are bad. It is because you are sick and we want to help you. You are my Reek, you are my Theon, remember that.” Standing back up, Ramsay said hoarsely, “Take him into the room. Sedate him then see me downstairs.”  Ramsay walked away fast and went to the balcony for some air..and to wipe away the tears scalding his cheeks.

“NO! NO! FUCK YOU!” He grabbed Skinner’s head and slammed it into the wall then broke past Alyn and ran. Damon was just coming to check on things before returning to his task and trapped Theon in the hallway. He nearly made it to their chambers when Alyn tackled him, but Theon held fast to the door frame. “IF YOU DO THIS I WILL NO LONGER BE YOURS! IF I LIVE, I WILL COME OUT HATING YOU FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!” He was screaming like dying animal. Damon swooped him up and took him away. “RAMSAY! RAMSAY!”

He hyperventilated as he was carried down the hall and whined in a cracked, trembling voice, “ _Master_!”

Ramsay clenched the banister as if he would be swept away if he let go. When he heard that cracked cry, he ripped away and ran down the hall. As he saw his pet disappear into the room with Damon, he ran towards them. “Reek! I love you, sweet boy! I just want you to be well.”

Alyn stopped Ramsay and grabbed his face with both hands. “Look at me. Ramsay, look at me. He’ll be alright. I promise you. Come with me.” The door shut behind them but the wailing continued. “Don’t listen. RAMSAY. _Look at me_. It’s the rum in his veins. It will make him say anything. Does the rum care for him as you do? No. It wants him to die painfully, slowly, inside and out torching everything he cares about. Don’t listen. Wait until it passes. Wait until it’s your boy alone in his body again.” Alyn put his forehead to Ramsay’s. “Do you understand?”

Ramsay took a shuddering breath and whispered, “Yeah, I understand. Please, you have to fix my boy, Alyn. Don’t let him die, don’t let him leave me for the rum. Make my Reek better.”

“We will. I am many terrible things, but I am no liar.” The wailing and thrashing stopped. “You shall see. There will be challenges later but,” Alyn pulled back with a  smirk and shrugged, “no worse than before… with him. Take a walk with me. We can … there are no woods or deer to hunt… we could…”

Ramsay grinned and said, “Well, we cannot hunt whores at least not for awhile...that will get us in trouble. They like us right now, we should try and keep it that way.” Ramsay was walking with Alyn now, leading him downstairs. “If Skinner makes it down in time, he can join us...I have a little present for you. Something to relive a little of all this stress. And a way of saying thank you.”

He led Alyn over to his new pretty thrall who has been bragging to all the other thralls of her new status. “Here is my new pretty shiny toy, Alyn. Isn’t she lovely?” He crooned. “Girl, this is one of my most important men, Alyn. The huge giant is Damon, who is now married to little Gwyn. The cadaverous one is Skinner. You can learn their names, you are a bright girl, aren't you? Now, sweet thing, come with us, we shall have a few drinks. Alyn, come see what I have been doing in Balon’s old room. Come girl, you will love it.”

“Oh! Thank you, Your Grace.” She practically skipped to his side and took his hand, which Alyn rolled his eyes at. She waved to her friends with a little laugh.

Ramsay winked at Alyn as he led the little victim into the dimly lit room. He lit the fireplace and allowed the girl a glass of very strong spirits. He figured on a little mercy since he was still raw from Theon. After the girl finished the drink and Alyn locked the door, Ramsay approached the girl slowly. “Now, on to your new position here. Well I suppose most of your positions will include being on your knees or on your back. Other positions will probably happen as well, my boys are creative. So am I.” He grinned at the girl and began to stroke her hair with a heavy hand.

“Boys?” She asked nervously. “I…” she inched away from Alyn and whispered to Ramsay. “... but I love you, my Lord. I would be your Saltwife, or bedwarmer. I would make you happy. You are so very handsome.”

Ramsay chuckled and said in a playful affectionate voice, “Ah, sweet thing, I already have a King for a pet, why would I need you? Except for when my little boy gets sick or is being a bad boy. Then I would come here to you, my pretty girl. And I would ask for your love, and much more. Sadly, that wouldn’t be very often, I don’t want you to get bored. So you will keep my faithful Alyn and my other boy Skinner company in any way they would like. Don’t worry, sweetness. I have rules, I am not a savage. They are not allowed to permanently injure you or kill you. Not even maim or remove any limbs. You are my personal whore now and I am choosing to share you with my most loyal companions. You should feel honored, my pretty little thing.”

Tears filled her eyes. She had heard tales about Euron and was a fool to doubt them, but only so foolish. She took her Lord’s hand and kissed it. “I am honored, my Lord,” she stuttered in a whisper. “You are quite generous with your little thrall. Thank you.” Tears ran down her face. At least this one, Alyn, was rather handsome. Her stomach was warm and her limbs light and numb.

Ramsay held the whimpering girl from behind and whispered into her ear, “Very good. I am so pleased that you are going to behave for us. That you are grateful. I will let you have a nice chamber of your own that we will visit you in. A real bed, real pillows, a real dresser, Skinner and Alyn will give you little gifts if you please them, as will I. Doesn’t that sound good, better than what you had, my pretty thing?” As Ramsay spoke, he was moving her forward into Alyn’s arms. “You can have her first, Alyn. But since I am her Lord, I will partake as well. But I want a virgin part.”   

“Your Grace,” she panicked, “oh, please, I did not mislead you. I have been with men, I thought you knew. Please forgive me, I thought you knew. I lost my maidenhead.” She shrunk back waiting to be struck.

Ramsay kissed the girl’s neck and pressed his bulge against her buttocks. “Hush, I am not angry. Alyn doesn’t mind...do you, Alyn?” Ramsay grinned and raised his eyebrows at Alyn who was now directly in front of the girl.

“Of course I don’t. You did not mislead anyone, sweet girl. Relax. It will be much better for you if you can try to relax all your muscles.” He smiled and began to untie her top. “No one is angry. You’re being so good. Isn’t she?”

Ramsay gave a small bite to the small shoulder as he began to slowly pull up her hem. “Yes, a very good girl. Such a sweet thing...I am so glad we picked you.” Ramsay ripped off her undergarments. His hand was gentle though as it ran up her thigh and across her ass. “Shh..you are doing so well for us.” He soothed as he began to put one arm around her waist, his other hand busy taking out his cock. “Alyn, see that oil on the table behind you? Perhaps you could grab that for us? We don’t want to hurt our little pretty toy, do we? We wouldn’t want to tear you up, you are a good girl. You don’t want us to hurt our sweet girl like that, do you?” He asked of the crying girl, his arm now anchoring the girl so her backside was nestling his hard cock.

“That boy changed your taste, my Lord,” Alyn teased with a wink. “Here.” He handed the oil over and pet the girls head. “Bend her over the table. Open your mouth, pet. I’ll be gentle.” He mouthed to Ramsay, _‘Be nice_.’ “I like her, get Skinner that mouthy one who’s husband threw her out. I hate to share with him.”

“Thank you for your kindness. Please don’t hurt me, I’ll be good.”

“Shh,” Alyn took his hard cock out.

Ramsay put the oil on his fingers and slipped one inside the incredibly tight hot space nestled between those perfect buttocks. He thrust to widen it and added another finger, leaving Alyn to do the soothing. “Alyn, you are right. You are my loyal friend in a way Skinner isn’t. You may keep her as your own after this. Though, I may ask to use her on occasion...but with you.”

Alyn’s face lit up. “Thank you! Yes, of course. I’ll share her with you. Ah,” His head rolled back when she took him into his mouth. “Oh, good girl. She’s too sweet and pretty for Skinner. He needs something… more _wild_.” He laughed and kept petting her head. “There you go. You’re doing so well. Keep trying.”

Ramsay oiled his cock and poised at her entrance. He poked and tried to be gentle as he forced himself into her ass. But he has had so much pent up anger and fear, the blood lust from earlier, it all came rushing forward. He gave a hard thrust and then shuddered with pleasure. It was so tight and the girl screamed muffled on Alyn’s cock. Growling, grabbed the small hips and pounded himself into her.

“Aye!” Alyn pulled back. “You should warn me! She could have bit my fucking cock off!” The girls was chanting, ‘no’ and ‘never’ and ‘please’ under Ramsay. “I know. It’s not _your_ fault, kitten.” Alyn was getting so hot watching Ramsay fuck her. He didn’t want to linger on Ramsay’s cut abs and frenzied expression, or think about what all was making him so hard, so he just looked down at the breasts squashed into the table and how her back arching up to her pert ass, and her little face crying and screaming. “Look at me. Try to look me in the eyes, love. That’s a good girl.” Alyn started pumping into his hand. “Oh fuck. Just hold on, sweetling. I will take such good care of you. Slow your shit down, Ramsay! If you rupture something you’ll kill her!”

The poor girl wailed.

“No! No! He’s not going to kill you.” He couldn’t stand her helplessness, it was intoxicating. She kept looking up at him with such need. “Are you close?” _Gods! Why did I say that?_

Ramsay suddenly stood straight up, pulling the girl with him. Still deep inside her he stayed still for a moment. He reached a hand around and wrenched her legs open. “Take her, we are both so close. I want us to fuck her together. Enjoy the present the first time together. Then she is all yours. And I promise, I won’t break her during it. Come on..” Ramsay used his best Reek voice his most seductive tone. His fingers splayed her labia, letting Alyn see the inviting pink folds.

“Oh shit…” Alyn swallowed and licked his lips. He looked at Ramsay, afraid that he’d been caught at something. Afraid of being that close when Ramsay was like this, and talking that way. _What if he touches me?_ He stumbled back. _What if I like it?!_ He knew Ramsay would be in need for at least a week.

“You…” he tried to sound casual and force himself not to stutter. “She can only take so much. I’ll wait.”

Ramsay shrugged and said, “Your loss. It isn’t like we haven’t done things like that before. Well, with Damon and Skinner at least. “Fine, let’s go at the same time at least.” The memories of those bloody rapes excited Ramsay. Anything but feeling angst, fear, and anger. This was all feeling, he let the memories flow and he fucked the bitch hard. This time he stayed upright, forcing her back and forth onto his cock to give Alyn a good view.“Ah, Alyn, now!” The girl screamed out as Ramsay slammed her back forth onto his cock while standing. Just as the girl was sure she really would rupture something Ramsay went still, deep in her. His face darted down and he bit deeply into her back. As he did he shuddered and poured himself into the girl.

At the same time Alyn yelled,”Fuck!” and came hard.


	20. Waiting For The Storm To Break

Theon wanted to die. He wanted that more than anything in the world. He has screamed it to the heavens, to his captors, to Ramsay. At one point Theon raged at his father who appeared to sneer at his greatest disappointment. He sweat, he stunk, he was filthy unless they washed him. At first, Theon was able to reach the chamber pot in time...but not all the time. Then the worst thing of all happened. He was struck with bile building his throat, bubbling up, while a cramp hit his intestines Sadly, his head made it to the chamber pot first. Then it hit again while he was sleeping in a corner wound in a sheet. He never made it even close to the chamber pot.

But his captors have not left him to wallow in his filth as they had done in the past. No, they cleaned him up, they rinsed his mouth and had him chew some bitter leaves that settled his stomach a little. Sometimes, all his muscles would seem to seize and he would scream and kick. That is when his captors gave him sweet drops that brought some peace, a small amount of sleep that was real and without horrors.

He screamed when his skin crawled off his body and red ants chewed at his bones, but one of the men held him tightly. Wouldn’t let him scratch the small fuckers off of him. Another time one of the men turned into a kraken and was trying to kill Theon with his tentacles.

Theon could have been three days or years, he had no concept of time in this hell. At one point he begged Ramsay to take him off the cross, he would do anything. But Ramsay was never there, only these men that Theon knew but couldn’t know right now. Everything was wrong, everything hurt and reality clashed with fantasy.

It was two weeks. Two of the longest weeks of Theon’s entire life.

 

Theon woke up and uncurled himself carefully. He was so shaky. He was so HUNGRY. Never has he been so starved in his life for something other than booze. And he felt so empty, so scared and Theon thought to himself, “Oh my Gods. I am sober. I am sober. What the hell do I now? Like a small child, Theon sat there, starved but too scared to call out.

The door opened and Alyn stepped inside. With a furrowed brow, Theon said in a husky broken voice, “I..I know you now. I am so hungry..please?” He twisted his hands together to hide the shaking. Which was stupid, Alyn has watched Theon do so much worse than just tremble. Right now he felt if Alyn said a single taunting word, he might crack to pieces on the floor. Like a vase that is knocked down. He will shatter. The most terrifying thing of all was knowing that he wasn’t going to die now. That was the worst part. Theon didn’t even know that he had spoken out loud. Alyn gave him a real ugly smile, not a sarcastic one. He knelt down near the shaking man and said, “I understand. I’ll get you some food. Listen, you feel empty right now, I know that. You are scared to death of what life without a bottle will be. I know. I was there and I survived. You already suffered the worst of it, that you sort of had to do alone. But now, this is the part where I can help you. I am going to teach you what life sober is, okay? Not all at once, it will take some time and that is perfectly fine. I am going to start you off with this. I want you to say to yourself this one thing. ‘Today, I will not drink. Just for today I won’t.’ It helps. Now off to get you some food!”

 

Severin came in moments later with a single cup of water. “Are you feeling better?”

“Leave me be,” Theon mumbled.

“The maester said you should be over the worst of it.”

Theon leaned into the corner, away from the piercing light.

“Is there something you want?” Severin tried.

“I want to be alone for the rest of my life. I want to forget everything. I want an end to this ceaseless pain. One thing eased my suffering, if only for awhile, and you helped them take it away…” his voice trailed off.

“I… I wanted to help you.” Severin sniffed wounded.

“I want help too. For me, for you and everyone.” He turned sharply to Severin. His eyes were so clear, even with the dark circles underneath and the hollow cheeks below that. “Bring me a sharp knife so I can be free of this suffering.”

“Why… why are you… why must you say such terrible things?” Severin whispered, brokenhearted all over again.

Theon stared as something rose within him. He rushed forward until the chain at his ankle caught him. Time after time, it would not let him near the door. “I hurt you? Do you know why? I am HURT. That is ALL that I am! That is all I have and all I am capable of giving. I am wretched! I am burning throughout with misery end it, or leave me, but don’t come to me for anything else, you foolish thrall! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME? I am on fire Severin! You touch me and cry to me your glove is singed!”

Severin dropped the cup and ran. Theon snatched it and smashed it into the window with a screaming grunt. Most of the glass burst out to be carried by the angry wind, but several shards fell to the floor. Theon picked and threw most of the pieces outside. He heard Alyn running back and hid the largest underneath his chamber pot.

“What was that?” Alyn set the food on the ground and found the broken window pane.

Theon sat on the floor. “I broke the fucking window.”

“Noted.” Alyn lay a cloth on the wood floor then placed Theon’s food on the cloth.

Theon covered his head when the door shut. He felt like crying but he was dry inside.

 

“My Lord,” a small voice squeaked. “This came for…” Severin didn’t even want to say his name. He felt a weight like guilt just thinking of him. “I thought…” Severin set the letter on Ramsay’s table.

Ramsay looked at the letter sitting there then looked up at the boy’s face. “You tried to visit Lord Theon, didn’t you? I told you to wait for a little longer, to let Alyn talk with him first.” Severin nodded then blinked rapidly, trying to ignore the tears stinging his eyes. “I know..I am sorry...The maester said he would be over the worst of the physical symptoms.” Coming around the desk, Ramsay put a large hand on the boy’s head. He made sure to speak softly. “Yes, but not the emotional symptoms. And Theon is still going to be in pain for some time, in body and soul. I am dying to see my love, but I will heed what Alyn tells me. He says we must wait and so we shall. RIght, Severin? I am here for you until he is better. You serve me and we will both show strength and loyalty for our King as he heals.” Severin leaned slightly into Ramsay’s hand and he smirked.

Going back behind the desk, Ramsay opened his letter and read it. “Jon Snow thinks to come for my boy, does he?” Sneering he gave his best Euron response. The words made Severin blush as he handed the letter to him. “Have this sent back for me, would you? Then bring me some ale..actually bring me some of that berry drink that Gwyn made and brought by. Theon might not appreciate it but I like the taste. Get some for yourself too, boy. Then I believe you should be meeting with the tutor.”  

Severin hung, aching, in the threshold. “What if he never gets better? What if this was all a mistake? Wait!” Severin gave his serious little head a shake. “I had nearly forgotten; one of your sons wishes to see you.” Severin lowered his voice, though no one who shouldn’t could hear. “You know… he hasn’t talked to you before… most of your bastards haven’t been deemed worth your time,  and there are many. They want to serve their lord father,” Severin suggested, taking care not to sound too bold.

Ramsay almost panicked for a small moment. He forgot about the “sons”, some could be real, most are just desperate to attach themselves to Euron’s name. There is a chance some will have seen their father many times and know he is not Euron. This will have to be handled quickly and very quietly. “Thank you, Severin. You are excellent at your work and I know I can trust you. This must be done quietly, we don’t need others sneaking around, wondering about their King. Let me speak to my men and handle this quietly. You will speak of this to no one.”

As the boy went to leave the room, Ramsay grabbed his shoulder. “As for Theon...he WILL get better. He already has improved, getting a bit better every day. Trust that the maester and Alyn know what they are doing. Trust me to know.” He said warmly, hoping that he wasn’t telling another lie.

Severin hugged Ramsay’s thigh tightly then looked up, fierce and determined. “You can trust me as well! I will defend this tower,” he declared, standing as tall as he could. Then he fled. Severin had his own secret place under an abandoned pier where he kept the sparring sword Theon had giving him. There was a sand dune he would mutilate when he felt this way. It could have many faces or none at all.

 

Reek used to catch rats by the tail. Sitting with his back on the cool stone wall, he'd watch them thrash and run in place. Sometimes he would speak to them,but he never befriended any. He had no food to give them.

There was one who would always give up and hang in the dark, just listening to the leak drip in the corner. Reek pitied its despair, so he killed and ate it.

 

Ramsay braced himself and took a deep breath before knocking on the door. As Alyn told him to do, he gave the knock, waited a few seconds for Theon to pull himself together then opened the door. He could tell by Theon’s face he was not expected.

Oh gods, he was so thin, he looked transparent he was beyond pale. Reek’s eyes were nearly obscured by the purple deep bruising all around his eyes from lack of sleep. Reek has always trembled when he was sacred. He trembled all the time at Dreadfort and Winterfell. But this wasn’t that kind of tremble. This was a continuous twitch that was clearly frustrating the hell out of him.What have they done to him? What did Ramsay allow? Theon looked like he was dying...but..there was something..

Ramsay could see that his pet’s eyes were aware, they were clear and they made him flinch. This was the first time Ramsay has ever flinched from anyone’s eyes except for his father. Clearing his throat, he spoke. “I have missed you more than you can imagine.” He almost cursed at his own stupidity. He needed information...he doesn't have time for this lump in his throat. Ramsay doesn’t have time to gather that thin suffering boy to his chest and comfort him. How do I address him? Is he Theon? Is he Reek or is this someone I have never met?

    “Where’s my drink?” Theon demanded, cold and bitter as the longest winter. “Alyn has not brought it. He’s stealing it.” Theon muttered, drawing his knees closer. He couldn’t bare to look at Ramsay or suffer his voice. He didn’t want any of this; nothing. He didn’t want the cruel help or laughable pity. They didn’t see how hopeless it was and how simple the answer would be. Every second he lives is another second he doesn’t think he could possibly withstand, yet they kept coming. Now Ramsay says I have missed you. Who? A blue white fire surges through his tremors.

    Finally he turns to Ramsay, in what feels like an explosion. He looks down at Theon, appalled. Frightened, he also thinks. “You don’t like what you’ve done to me? Then end it or fucking kill me like you should have done years ago.”

Ramsay slammed his emotions shut with a clang deep inside, Alyn had warned him that Reek wasn’t ready yet. That he would be angry, very angry and might even try to hurt him or wheedle something out of him. So Ramsay pulled his cold cruelty over him like a shield. “I doubt Alyn is stealing your drinks. If you don’t want my sincere words and feelings, then don’t have them. I am here for a reason, King Theon. Euron’s “sons” want audience with their father to seek his favor. Who are his sons?” He waited, staring down at Theon, trying to keep his face a blank mask.

    Theon leaned back with a bitter expression that could hardly pass as a smile. “I could tell you which of his living children would know his face, but I’m in so much pain, you see, that it's hard to think clearly. You know what would help me remember?”

Ramsay felt his anger rise and he clenched his fists. “This is YOUR legacy, remember? Did you forget everything? Even your people? I can kill the ones who are his real sons to protect us all, but I need to know who they are! Is getting everyone here possibly killed worth your pride and need for a drink?”

He had the flaying blade in his pocket, he had stolen it back from Damon. He didn’t want to use it, but he had to know, he just did. And to be honest, his hand itched. The tension, the worry, the feeling of helplessness was overwhelming him. The blade has always been a comfort. It always evened out the field for him too. He has not reached for it yet, but he is close and knows it. “Tell me who they are, don’t spite your own people.”

“I have no people. I have misery.” His enraged face succumbed to sorrow. “I hate hurting you but that’s all I am capable of doing. All I am is pain; what else can I give?” Then his eyes darted up and he looked as he did when he was starving and smelled the fresh bread Ramsay carried. “Please, please help me. I cannot live like this another day.” Theon got up on his knees. “There is no pride in me. Just ease hell for me, just once, I’ll tell you everything. I’ll do or be anything. Isn’t that what you want to have again? Complete devotion, control, loyalty? Don’t you want me anymore?” Theon started weeping. It was so dry and hollow like the void he was.

Ramsay stormed to the door and yanked it open to glare at Alyn. “Either he gets the drink right now or I will start flaying him for information. Which will be less harmful to him, do you think?”

Alyn sighed then shook his head going to get the mug. “You are setting up a bad thing here. He will think he can use drink to maneuver you if you give in this time. But if you flay him, I am not sure he would ever forgive you for it now that he is clearing up.” Thrusting the mug at Ramsay, Alyn entered the room. “THeon, don’t get used to the change in schedule. Ramsay is needing the information it’s the only reason I am allowing this. Because he and I care about your folks, even if you don’t right now.” Slamming the door shut, he left Ramsay holding the mug.

Slowly, holding the drink just out of reach, Ramsay approached Theon. “Let’s see how badly you want your fucking drink, boy?”

“I do! Please! I’ll tell you, it’s easy. The only children who would know his face for certain are either with him, wherever he is, or they would be women older than me. I doubt his daughters would come themselves, if he has any, and if they even know he’s their father.” Theon crawled forward until the cuff at his ankle pulled him back. “Please. I’ll do anything. It’s not that I didn’t want to serve you, I’m dying.”

Ramsay wanted desperately to throw the drink into Reek’s face. No, not Reek, not even Theon. This wheedling sounding thing, this desperate looking, grasping, reaching creature...regardless of how many times he was called it..Reek was never really a creature. This, this was the first time Ramsay felt he really was looking at a creature, it was repulsive and he hated it.  “Here, have it.” He couldn’t hide the disgust in his voice, but he didn’t think the creature cared. “Do not grab it from me, I will hold it for you. You shake too much still.”

Theon hesitated, looking into Ramsay’s eyes. He never looked at Theon, or Reek, or the fool Prince of Winterfell this way but it was an expression Theon recalled nonetheless. He looked from the mug to Ramsay, but he just couldn’t bare the fevered shell his body had become for another heartbeat, and drank greedily. His arms slipped around Ramsay’s legs.

As soon as he’d finished downing all he could he coughed and gasped for air pressing into Ramsay desperately. “Don’t leave me. Please, Master, don’t leave. Listen, if you don’t already, one day you will find yourself wishing for my death. I have to tell you, that’s alright, and if I do die, I forgive you and I love you. I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry the split in your heart cracked for me when you could have loved someone better, someone who wouldn’t cause you all this pain. You won’t wish me dead because you hate me, you’ll only want the suffering to stop, for everyone and I understand that.”

“Wait,” Theon got up on his knees and held fast to Ramsay’s hips. “You think the person you knew is dead, but I’m not yet. I’ll try, I mean it, only don’t hate me. If you hate me then there is nothing, no reason to go on. Please, tell me you could love me again! If not I’ll die shortly, while I still love you; while I still have that at least!”

Ramsay yanked on the sweaty, stiff curls and growled out, “Do not try and manipulate me. I love you, you know that I love you. Why else would I put us all through this hell? I will never stop loving you, I will never give you up on you. And I will not allow you to die on me, or escape me ever. I am disgusted at the sickness, not at you, pet. Don’t forget that you love me, Theon.” It hurt more than it should to force himself to gently push his pet away after a forced kiss on his parched lips.

          “Don't- when are you coming back?! You can't leave yet!” Theon scratched at his arm. “It will never be the same. I have nothing to offer offer like this. You see that now.” He mumbled rapidly. “Could I have have another blanket?” It was so cold when the wind whipped through the broken pane.”

“I will have someone fix the window, but you have to stop breaking it! I have to go deal with this issue, Theon. I will come back, I promise. And yes, Alyn can you give my boy an extra blanket?” Alyn rolled his eyes but stormed out to get another blanket. Kneeling down, Ramsay grabbed his pet’s face. “I love you. You have so much to offer. You’ll see that once you feel a little better. Trust me, please. This is to help you, I swear it.”

“They are Greyjoys. You cannot offer them them their name, it is theirs by right.” Theon suddenly pulled away. “Alyn hates me. Send someone else, you promised you would.” He stood slowly and curled into his blankets. “Keep mothers out, though I doubt any will come. Most are from the mainland or further and never want to see him again.”

Ramsay sighed and said, “Theon, Alyn doesn’t hate you. We have been over this. He is the only person here who actually has been through what you are going through now. Alyn is taking care of you until you don’t need his help as much. Once you are calmer, feeling a little better, you will talk with him. And it will bring you comfort and he understands things that I don’t. For once I have to admit that I am not skilled to handle this. And you know I hate admitting any weakness. Thank you for telling me about Euron’s sons. I promise to keep things running well for you. Someday, you will rule at my side and I keep that thought close.” He put a hand on his poor love’s face and gently rubbed the sallow cheek, it was papery thin and too dry. It scared Ramsay half to death. “I love you, I don’t care if you are angry with me, I love you. No matter what you say or do, I won’t stop loving you. And I will never leave you and you will never leave me.” When Alyn came back into the room, Ramsay stood and pulled himself away. “I will come back and visit you very soon, I promise!”

Theon swallowed and blinked his burning eyes. “I will leave you. Then you’ll know a fraction of the pain I feel,” he muttered weakly under his breath. Ramsay’s kindness was a new form of torture, it left nothing for Theon but guilt and regret to drown beneath.

Once Alyn left him, Theon snuck the shard of glass from under his chamberpot. He ran a tremorous finger down the jagged edge then threw it out the window.


	21. The Truth Hurts as Deeply as Lies Sometimes

 

Ramsay stormed down the hall and was in full Euron glory. All his boys were with him and the hall has been cleared. Only the “sons” of Euron were invited in and Ramsay had requested of Damon that Gwyn be the server this day. “I know she is yours now, but I need a servant that I can trust not to ever speak of what was said or done. There is no one I trust more than you, Damon. You will make sure your sugar girl does as she is told and stays loyal and silent. The girl only ever has to work when we need absolute privacy.”  

Damon didn’t seem very happy about it but he knew how much stress Ramsay was under. Also, he knew that it was true, any thrall or servant Ramsay had in there otherwise would have to be killed after to protect them. His only concern was that no one dared to hurt his Gwyn. Damon knew she was safe around the boys and Ramsay of course, but he didn’t know these desperate strange men wanting to gain something from Euron.

Ramsay had all the men lined up to enter his hall. Only his boys, himself, Severin and Gwyn were present. The boy was stationed beside his Lord Euron, a huge honor of course. His chair was not as impressive and he had a small tankard of milk, his weapons  offered were a quill and paper. “You will write down every name, everything they asked of me. Everyone in their families, who their friends are. You do not speak unless spoken to and you do not look at the men except to get a basic description that they may have that stands out. That you write down too. Good lad.”

A tall, pale handsome young man came gliding in with a sharp grin. He knelt in front of Ramsay. “Lord Father.” He looked up with reverence, though a hungry anger made his smile tight. “I am Ardan Greyjoy, your eldest known living son. I and your other children have made many successful raids on Westerosi shores. Now that your banishment has passed and you’ve claimed your rightful place we ask to serve you. He jumped up and slammed a map on the dais. “A Northern fleet was spotted entering Cape Kraken. Let us smash it for you and prove our worth.”

He had some of his own ideas and was desperate to make his own name by clutching to Euron’s. So, Ramsay had him sit at the front table with Gywn serving him ale. Ramsay would wait until he had all the men in here...then he would send the girl and boy out before the slaughtering begins.

A slight, finely made boy came strutting in like a Lannister. He was lovely with large green eyes and dark wavy hair, but he had the same sharp, cold expression as his half-brother. “ _Father_ ,” he stood waiting with his arms crossed.

With great amusement, Ramsay leaned forward hands flat on the table. “Ah, son. I like your attitude. Please, sit at the front table, clearly that is where you should be. Gwyn will get you some ale right away.” His steely grin crept forth as he thought of what he was going to do with that one. He leaned past Severin and gestured to Damon, who was carefully watching that neither of those boys touched his sugar girl.

“Damon, the other one. Keep him alive afterward. Put him in a cell...on a cross.”

Damon snorted and gave a nod.

 

After an hour of requests, Damon walked to stand behind Ramsay. “They’re all here. They seem afraid to approach you.” He leaned over to Ramsay’s side. “You want me to pull Ardan and little one out now? Alyn could take your elder son out for a walk and review his plans while I introduce Emory Greyjoy to his new accommodations.”

Ramsay smiled and said, “Oh yes. I want Ardan and that little one. Be careful not to hurt them too much. I am feeling fatherly.”

Emory slowly looked Damon over disdainfully. “When will my father see me _alone_?” he asked coldly as if he were a man three times his actual size.

Damon gave a very tolerant smile to the boy and kept his voice a level rumble. “Now actually. He wanted to make sure that no one would witness his meeting, the real meeting between you, your brother and your father. Euron has a reputation to keep, he has to seem as cold to you as all the other men. Difference is, he believes your claim and is impressed your strength. Your cleverness. He wishes to speak with you in private to speak about your future.” He was leading the boy through winding tunnels towards a dungeon cell.

“Good. I want to know just where the fuck he’s been and what he plans to do for my poor mother.” Emory glanced at Damon, irritated by his presence and kept following along fueled by his anger.

Damon managed to maneuver the little prick by talking of the imaginary plans for his mother that would probably happen until they reached a cell. “He is in here, one minute I have to get a torch for you. Well, I’ll open the door for you and get the torch.” Damon opened the door then shoved the boy in.” He slammed the door shut, locking it and leaned against it.

“Getting the torch, one second. It’s here somewhere…” Yawning, Damon slowly reached for a torch then took his time lighting it. It was an old torch, nearly useless, only producing a weak glow.

Emory slid his dagger out of its sheath and backed up until his back hit cool, damp stone. “What the fuck is this, you fucking Umber? Where is he?”

“Umber? That isn’t very nice of you. Where is who? Oh, Euron? I imagine he is sharpening his blades and debating whether to visit you or your brother first. Here is your torch, dear.”

Damon slid open a small shelf built into the thick dungeon door, putting the torch through it, letting it hit the floor. “Go on and keep your little dagger if you want to. We don’t mind, we will get it away from you later on.” Damon chuckled and slid the wood partially shut.

He waited for Ramsay to join him and put the little arrogant shit on the cross.

Emory snarled. _Fuck!_ He started feeling around the room for any other weapons, doors or windows. There was a strange wooden strutcture in the room's center. “What is the point of this, giant man? What does your lord and master have to fear or take from me?”

Damon snorted with amusement at “giant man”. “My name is Damon. And this isn’t to take anything from you but your fucking arrogance. He doesn’t fear you, he wants to find the truth of you. And by the way, consider yourself quite lucky. Every other petitioner here claiming they were related are hacked to death by now and fed to the ocean creatures. Only you and your brother are still alive. Euron believes your claim, but now he needs to know are you just related by blood...or are you a son he can find worthy of his fortune? Worthy to captain his ships. Worthy to keep the name son. Your arrogance towards your sire has put you here as well. Might want to think upon that before your father comes to see you.”

Emory didn’t wait to believe or understand the Mammoth’s words before acting. “WAIT! Not Byron! Tell him Byron is my brother! That’s his son! Tell him! You have to save him! Please! He can tell! Just look at him!”

Damon bent down to look into the small hole, but keeping his face at a distance. “Byron? I will send word but I do believe it is too late.” He shut the partition and called over a half asleep man. “Hey! Wake the fuck up. Go upstairs, Skinner, Alyn or Lord Euron that there is a young boy named Byron. He is not to be killed, he is Emory’s youngest brother! Lord Euron’s own son! Hurry, man or you’ll be responsible for the death of your Lord’s son!”

He watched as the man paled and ran as if he were on fire.

“Thank you,” Emory gasped and sank. His courage failed him as relief brought fear sweeping in with it. “Thank you.”

 

Ramsay swept into the dungeon room three hours later with Damon in tow. “Before you hear anything of your brothers, you will slide that blade over to us, son.”

Emory snarled at Euron but begrudgingly obliged. “There’s no reason to kill or torture me. If you hadn’t left the islands in disgrace you would know that I’m actually quite popular and I’ve made a good bit of money running uncle’s rum. Look at these fine clothes. You think my father ‘paid the Iron price for them?’ Fuck no. _I_ did this. _I_ bring in money for _your_ kingdom and people love me for it. But,” he shrugged and smiled innocently. “I’m no threat to you either. I have no claim to the throne at all, do I? So what’s the point? _This_ is your fucking apology to me?”

“Oh, you certainly remind me of someone. Yes indeed.” Ramsay picked up the blade and handed it to Damon. “I am going to ignore that outburst of yours for a moment. First, do you want to hear about your brothers? Or would you rather keep babbling? I can leave and come back later if you’d like? Do you need some more time to yourself?”

Emory’s slight white hands balled at his sides. He squinted at the strange man who really was pale as himself, just as mother had said. “I gave you my _only weapon_ , didn’t I?”

Nodding, Ramsay walked forward slowly, gesturing as he spoke. “Yes you did, but then you ran your mouth about how amazing you are….do you know what happens when I need silence and don’t receive it?”

He swallowed stepping back and clenched his jaw not to scream out his rage and indignation.

“Much better. I see you have heard the stories after all. Good, saves time on explanations and demonstrations. Now...Byron was found just in time...I had him brought directly to me to deal with personally.” Ramsay gave a shark smile and continued to pace as he spoke.

“I gave him a sack of food, a cow, a horse and a bit of gold in his purse. He was sent home to his mother like a little boy should be. Your mother will receive a small sum of money every month, so will your brother. When he reaches his older teens, he may come to join us if he so wishes. Is that to your liking, boy? If that mouth of yours opens it best be to thank me for my generosity and mercy. It also better mention an apology for the attitude I have been enduring from you.”

Emory sank a little and realized he’d been holding his breath. His eyes stung but this was no time for weakness, he had to parry. “Thank you, my lord. Thank you for being kind and merciful to your youngest son. _I’m sorry_ ,” he was able to force through his biting smile. “That’s more than I would have asked for.” After a gracious bow, he rushed with his head held high, towards the door. Emory crossed his arms and tilted his head. “Your men _locked_ it.”

“Ah, what a disappointment after all..you need so much work, boy. Your other brother is in his own cell. Both of you will remain in your cells until I am satisfied that you will be the sons I need and want. If either of you escape or attempt to fight your way to freedom, it will be your mother and youngest brother that pay. If you gain your freedom through pleasing me in your training, then you flee or betray me...it will be them that pays for it. I will have Damon whip them into bloody stripes. Then Alyn will beat the boy while I force your mother to watch it as I rape her. I will then let my men all rape her while the boy watches. The boy will be flayed alive first so your mother can watch that. Only then will we allow her the mercy of a slow death.” Ramsay spoke in a sing-song voice, as if telling a soothing lullaby to a child.

Emory sank to the floor and wrapped his arms around his knees. “Please don’t hurt my family.” He wiped his eyes on his fine silk tunic. “I’ll do what you want, my Lord,” he said softly and sniffed. “Ardan’s not like me. Don’t judge him based on what I’ve done. You’ll like him better.”


	22. For the Honor of Serving

Ramsay knelt on one knee before Ardan and spoke softly, almost kindly as one gloved hand roughly held the tall broad boy’s chin to look him in the eyes. 

“I will judge you each on your own merits and behavior. And your mother and brother are going to be fine as long as you are behaving. Now, you have a made a very good start here. I am pleased. Skinner will be your caretaker, handler, trainer and about the only person you may see for some time. Trust him and obey him, he is here to help you. Help mold you into what I need and want for my own son. And because I hold Skinner in such high regard and you are still very much a risk for me, you might even wish to see it as Skinner is your owner. How far you go..how soon you leave this cell or have a change in your status...is all up to him. This is all to teach you, to turn you into what you supposedly wanted. To be like your father, to be with your father, serving. Well, this is how that goes. Myself, each of my men have suffered, sacrificed, screamed full in the face of nightmares that consumed us in order to be where we are. You grew up without a father, yes. But even that isn’t the same as what you will face on those waters. When you engage in bloody, ruthless battles. Now you will have that sacrifice, that suffering and fear...it will slice you, consume you and then...comes the metamorphosis into a man all will respect if not cower before. That is what I want and need from you, son.”

“Wha-what if my mother was… wrong?” He could never have imagined he’d be trying to forfeit his birthright. The had the same light eyes, though Euron’s were far lighter, the same black hair and white skin. He didn’t think he’d ever doubted his mother, but now the answer seemed so clear and he wasn’t sure it was the one he wanted after all. Ardan lowered his head and years of emotions overtook him before he could stop it.

Ramsay smiled and put his hand on the boy’s head. “Oh no, you are clearly of my blood. And you will make me proud to call you son soon enough. Think of the glory you shall have! And think...with every success, you may send your family as much money and treasure as they could ever wish for. Once you and your brother have proven yourselves to be truly trying to learn..you may visit with each other under supervision. Who knows, maybe someday you will sail together?” 

He stood up and walked out of the cell giving Skinner a leer on his way out. “I shall wait for Skinner to let me know when our next visit should be. Remember, you do not want him calling me back in before that time..for bad behavior.”

Ardan shook his head and watched Euron leave. “No, Father,” he said as loudly as his tight thick throat could manage.

“Excellent. A very good start indeed. Yes. I am impressed at how well you take to advice. You will be just fine, in good hands. We shall see each other again soon, Ardan. My son.” Ramsay left the room and locked the door behind him, leaving Skinner alone with the young scared man.

Ramsay sneered and then nodded to Skinner, amused by Skinner’s excited eyes. Leaning close he whispered to Skinner, “If you decide you like him..he is yours. Your project and your responsibility. Think of him as your pet...your Reek...except I need this one to be able to be strong, humble and loyal to the fucking bone before he touches my ships. All yours, if you want the job of it.”

Ardan swallowed and quickly looked at the floor. “I have to sleep in here? In the dark on the stone?” he asked quietly and tried desperately to keep from weeping. “It doesn’t matter if Mother and Byron are safe.”

Skinner started to pace around the boy and his voice was silky and menacing all at once. “You can earn a blanket...other comforts.” A smile that was not reaching his eyes spread across his face.

 

Ramsay whistled jauntily and he and Damon headed for the other cell. He unlocked the door and caught sight of the boy stretched upon the cross. Saliva filled his mouth and tasted of copper. This is just what he needs to let go of his worry and upset over Reek.

 

Emory struggled against the ropes binding him, if only in a vain effort to hide his trembling. 

Ramsay smirked and walked over to the naked trembling boy attached to the cross. He drew his flaying knife and put it against the dry lips. “Hush. Daddy is speaking now. Let me tell you what is happening outside of this room. Your youngest brother has been sent home to your mother. I have sent money and provisions for them. They will stay quite well and safe...as long as I am never betrayed by you or Arden. He is in a cell just like this one.”

He moved his blade to play along the flesh ready and begging to be peeled and tried to not to lose himself.

“What the fuck do you want from me?” His thin white thighs flexed and strained. He groaned trying not piss himself. “All the stories are true and I fucking defended you like an idiot! You hurt my  _ mother _ , didn’t you? She only said you seduced her to spare my feelings. I hate you! I should have come to kill you, not make amends. Fine!” The tremors running through his body were strong enough to make his voice quiver. “Do it!” He spit in Euron’s unaging face. “Coward!”

Ramsay smiled and then put the edge of the blade against the boy’s lips. He spoke very softly and measured.

“That was very rude. Disrespectful. Then again, what do I expect from little boys that come demanding rights to my hard earned things? Your mother was a lovely thing and she did indeed catch my eye with her smile. She was a sweet thing, willing and hot. But..she was respectful, unlike her children. If you and your brother wish to prove to be MY sons, you must learn. I believe you are my blood, what I am not sure about...is your worth to me. I cannot allow unruly, disrespectful brats to run about with my men, my ships, my name. You do understand that, don’t you? Now, let’s try being respectful and apologizing for your insults.” He removed the knife from the boy's’ lips and waited.

“I’m sorry, I thought civility had ceased to be a concern between us when your men tied me to a fucking cross.” He tried to study Euron through the cold white fear clouding his mind like mist across a port bow. He thought he saw the chance to leave this room alive. “Alright, I apologize.”

Ramsay’s smirk grew along with the intensity of his eye. “You offer me an apology while insulting me with no title? Not even the word father which you so eagerly wished for earlier? I cannot accept that apology. Try again, boy.”

He started to dance his blade along his fingers playfully as he waited.

“I’m sorry, Your Grace,” Emory said as pleasantly as he could fucking stand.

“So insincere, but close enough for now. Since you are my son and not just any boy in front of me, I shall show you some mercy. For being insolent I am only going to flay a very small part of you. Just a tiny ribbon of flesh from your arm. And you should know that I usually flay at least a whole body part or simply cut out the tongue of rude persons. You should feel honored that I have taken the time to deal with you myself and you should feel grateful that your punishment for being rude is so very small.” 

Brandishing his flaying knife, Ramsay smiled and announced, “Let us begin.” With careful precision, Ramsay began to flay a small section of skin from the boy’s arm. 

Emory couldn’t keep himself from screaming and sobbing any longer.     

 

“Morning.” Alyn set a bowl of porridge and honeyed bread and a mug of tea. 

“Is it?” Theon rubbed his eyes with the thick base of his palms. He peered over at the food and drank the steamy tea. “Thank you.” 

He ate slowly until he was too distracted by Alyn’s presence. “What is it? Did something happen?”

“I think you should return to your chambers… on your chain.”

Theon tapped his thin fingers against the warm clay mug. “Go back? With Ramsay?”

“Maybe you should keep separate chambers for a while longer.”

Theon nodded in agreement. “I’m scared of everything,” he mumbled to the stone wall across from him.

“Good. You’re awake. Now you can learn how to live this way. Don’t smile politely, I know you don’t believe me. You should bathe after you eat then we’ll change your clothes and return you to your quarters.” He left when Theon nodded.


	23. Itching Scabs

Ramsay cleaned his blade and looked at the very small bleeding wound. “There, now you have your first real taste of pain, of fear and a lovely scar as a reminder to talk respectfully to your Lord and Father. You took it quite well, boy. Damon, some water for the lad.”

Damon handed a skin of water to Ramsay with a grin. Gently, Ramsay lifted the boy’s chin and offered the water.

Emory flinched at the touch. Painful twitches ran through his muscles like lightning in a terrible storm. Even as he tried to focus on the cool water and the relief that it was over a movement of air that wouldn’t even count as a breeze made the sliver of exposed nerves sing terribly. He gritted his teeth and his heel knocked against the wood, beyond his control. His whole body was beyond his control, it was all he thought he really had.

“Good boy.” Ramsay cooed, patting the boy’s cheek. Checking the gleam in Ramsay’s eye, Damon cleared his throat slightly louder than needed. Ramsay glared at him but then sighed. Reek...Theon...wouldn’t like to hear he flayed and raped a young boy that thought he was Euron’s son. Plus, he knew Reek was returning to their chambers and he was desperate to see him.

Sighing, Ramsay ruffled the boy’s hair and smiled. “You did very well and I am pleased. Damon, see to it that the Maester tends my son’s wound and gives him a little milk of the poppy to help him sleep. Take him down from this and put him in a room upstairs. Now son, until I feel I can trust you, I must use caution. You will wear a chain on your ankle in that room until I think you are ready to obey and trust your father. You will train and learn every day under the guidance of my men, myself and possibly even the Prince himself. I do hope you take advantage of these things I am offering you.”

Emory couldn’t resist shuddering away from the man, though he only had a centimeter or two of space to do so. “Thank you, Your Grace,” he stammered hoarsely. Tears started flowing and he realized he had been certain he would die here, one cut at a time. He bit his lip not to weep in relief. What could it matter? He’d completely disgraced himself already. Emory dropped his head and heard himself whimper.

Ramsay took a breath as he felt something terrible overwhelm him...it was pity for this boy and he hated the feeling. With a snarl, he cut through the ropes and lifted the boy himself. As he carried the boy out of the dungeon, he called to Damon, “Get the damned maester and tell him I am in the guest room with MY SON. He is needed immediately and so are you. So hurry.”

Damon was surprised but shrugged and went to find the maester. He has a feeling this will be an interesting story to share with Gwen tonight. 

Emory’s pain was completely muted by shock. He shook in Euron’s arms and stared up at him. His father…  _ father _ … it still seemed like a looming ghost, an idea, not a warm person with their own life and thoughts. He doesn’t have a father, but his heart was pounding so wretchedly. He had to squeeze his eyes shut to push away hopes and pain he’d buried years ago. 

Ramsay smirked and held the boy tighter, he seemed so fragile and small. “It is alright if you cry, boy. Most do when flayed or tortured. I am proud of you, son. You took it quite well. You will learn things the hard way as young boys must sometimes. There is no shame in that. I am glad that you and your brother have come to me. Soon, you will be trained, you will sail on the finest of my ships with the best of my men under your command. The day will come, I swear it. For now….you are still a young boy, a hurt one at that. And my very own boy.”

He crooned these words to the boy in a calming velvet voice as he carried Emory into a clean small guest room. Ramsay lowered the boy onto the bed carefully. Walking to the other side of the bed, he grabbed a chain and the cuff attached to it. Quickly he put the cuff on the boy’s right ankle and locked it. “The maester and Damon will be back in a moment.” In a moment that Ramsay didn’t plan, he tucked the blankets over the boy and then ran his hand through the boy’s hair.

Emory gasped and stared up in tear-blurred awe. “You… you really want  _ me _ ?” he whispered. All the armor he’d entered Pyke with had shattered completely.  _ “I’m sorry. I was just scared.” _

Ramsay saw his Reek in this boy, the eyes so needy and hurt, wanting, dying for approval and love. He cupped the boy’s face in his hands. 

“You are my son. Of course I want you. I enjoy this apology and I accept it. I understand you were scared, are still scared. And I cannot promise you that your training won’t involve pain and fear. But I do swear that you will have a place here with your father and on my ships. If you need to cry, rage or fight, we will understand and not mock you for it. I will learn to be a good father and you will learn to be my good son. It has already begun and I am already so pleased with you. Truly. I want to hear it from your lips, tell me you are my son and a good boy, Emory.”

Emory’s eyes grew larger. He swallowed hard and his eyes scanned the bed nervously. “I… I am your son and a… good boy, Your Grace. I will make you proud, Father.”

Ramsay’s smile grew larger. “I like hearing you call me father. Ah, here is the maester and Damon. Milk of the poppy for my son then tend his wounds. Son, I will be back to visit you after you have had some rest.” He stood up and nodded to Damon. “Make sure the boy has been tended to properly. Have Gwyn or Severing bring him some supper in a few hours when he rouses. Rest now, boy. I shall see you soon.”

Emory sniffed and sighed as the concoction started warming his stomach. “Thank you, Your Grace.” His head rolled over to gaze up at the man-giant. “I’m sorry I was difficult and mean to you.” His eyelids grew impossibly heavy as the soft bed began to feel like a lazy cloud embracing him with an easy, sunny love he’d never felt before. He even smiled as his eyes closed.

Ramsay flew up the hallway and nearly ran over Alyn. “Where is he? Where is Reek? Did you really say he can come back to our rooms? I want to see him!”

“Yes, but, wait WAIT, Ramsay, remember I said I don’t think he’s ready to  _ live _ with you yet. He’s afraid to even see you. He feels a lot of things that he’d numbed away and he’s still pretty raw. He feels very guilty and... well… how about meeting him for breakfast tomorrow?”

Ramsay wanted to beat Alyn’s face in, kick down the door and take his Reek back to their room. To hell with this nonsense, he knows how to control his pet. Instead, Ramsay bit his lip and gave a sharp nod. 

“Fine. Breakfast then. Tell me, does he still hate me? Is he still angry with me? Do I have a chance or was this fucking hell that I went through for nothing? The suffering he went through. Have I just lost my Reek forever? Did he sweat out along with the fucking booze?” 

He didn’t even know his blade was out and he was advancing on Alyn until Damon gently warned, “Ramsay...that won’t help anyone. Just talk, if you flay him, you’ll only get screams. You won’t hear the answers to your questions that way. Remember, you told your Reek that you were going to change as he did.” Ramsay snarled and yelled, “FUCK!” then put his blade away and stared at Alyn.

Alyn smiled when the blade dropped but still kept his palms in the air and stepped back. He tried not to laugh. “He loves you. He’s yours. What if you see him for a bit tonight and I just kind of hang out by the open door? I actually think you would both feel better. He doesn’t hate you, though, I can promise that.” Alyn giggled. “He asked the same things about you. Aren’t you two adorable?”

Ramsay growled. “I want to rearrange the bones in your face. I want to kill you. Thank you for taking such good care of my boy. Yes, I want to see him tonight and at breakfast. I want to have Damon smash your head in. I am going to see Reek now.” He stalked away.

“Aw, Ramsay! Don’t be-  _ shit _ ! I’m sorry, man!” He looked up at Damon plaintively. “Do you think it’s safe for me to follow? I actually like that little fuck up, but not enough to die horribly for him.”

Chuckling, Damon smacked Alyn on the back hard enough to make him stagger into the wall. “Don’t worry. He just got all sorts of shit out of his system on those boys. Then he had a nice moment with the new ‘son’.”  

“Damon! That shit does  _ not _ make me feel any better, mate.” He had to laugh and shake his head. “Better than murdering lost peasants, isn’t it? Yeah, adopting young men for gods only knows… he is getting much better. Wouldn’t old Roose be proud… or terrified? I could never tell. He only ever looked indifferent. As long as someone is guarding their tower, I’ll leave Ramsay to his pet, I think.”

Damon grinned. “I’ll head that way and keep my ear to the door if it gets too quiet. If it sounds loud and dangerous, I’ll go in. Want me to make him keep the door open? Oh and don’t worry, Ramsay didn’t fuck them. He did flay his favorite son, though. Roose would be very pleased, actually.” He gave Alyn a playful but rough rub on his head. “I’ll go babysit the kiddies, coward. Go take a break. If Reek freaks out, I’ll call for you. Hey, here that rhyme in there? Reek freak?”

“Oh, yes. I’ve heard it chanted enough and shit like it that  _ I  _ started mumbling it laying in bed waiting for sleep to come.” Alyn shook his head. “It’s been a long road but at least it didn’t end with a cliff.” He yawned and stretched. “Thanks, Damon. Flayed his favorite, huh?” He patted Damon’s arm. “Good thing you’re his favorite friend!”

Damon shuddered and grimaced. “Well, that is a horrid fucking thought. Good thing I am never stupid enough to anger him like you and Skinner do. And besides, if he was ever going to flay me, it would have been when I wanted to marry Gwen. You know how jealous Ramsay is..he was angry...but he didn’t flay me and he let me marry. I guess there is no real danger of flaying for me. But you and Skinner...I’d watch your backs...but you know what? I don’t think you’ll ever be flayed. Two reasons. One, you fixed Ramsay’s Reek. That earns big points with him. Two, you are never in ANY danger of becoming the favorite friend.”

Alyn threw his head back and laughed. “True! It’s pretty nice! He  _ gave  _ me a girl. No jealousy at all. Well,” he shrugged and chuckled, doing an impression of their lord, “Here, Alyn, my loyal friend! Keep this girl for yourself! You deserve it!’ It wasn’t really a fight and she is fucking astonishing, Damon.” Alyn wiggled his eyebrows.  _ Best friend that, asshole. _

Snorting, Damon replied dryly, “I am married to the most fucking astonishing woman on this island. He probably gave you some pox ridden whore he found. I haven’t seen a girl come near you once here. I think you're either lying or I’m right about the girl he gave you.” Damon grinned as he shoved Alyn.

Alyn grunted and stumbled. “Oh, aye? I’ll bring her round for breakfast but you have to be nice to her. I think she’s friends with your wife. She’s a very sweet, delicate thing, Damon, be an asshole to me, not her. Or be an asshole to Reek if you’re so sick of being the favorite.” Alyn grinned. He shrugged. “Your Gwyn is very nice. I like her. She keeps you from being completely intolerable and I really appreciate that in a bride.”

Damon grinned in a sickly sweet way that he cannot see. “My Gwyn is perfect. SHe is a bit feisty too though she does try to hide it from me. If I tormented some poor girl that is already having to deal with YOU, my little wife would give me such a look. Might even make my dinner with too much salt and nothing to drink! I won’t scare your girl. Whether she has pockmarks or not. Let me go make sure that Ramsay isn’t killing Reek or Reek isn’t trying to leap out a window.”

He started to saunter away, whistling a happy tune.

Alyn rolled his eyes. Thank the gods for that poor, poor woman. He shook his head and decided passing out sounded like the best plan he’d devised in months.

“Hey, wait! What is this girl’s name? I want to ask Gwyn if she knows her!” Damon hollered from the middle of the hallway.

Damon heard Alyn yell back. “Harold.” He chuckled and said, “Her parents didn’t like her much then?” A tired laugh floated over him. “Her name is Talli.” 

 

Ramsay walked slower and slower as he headed towards the bedroom door. He stopped and took a few deep breaths before knocking on the door. Stay calm no matter what, Ramsay told himself sternly. He raised a fist and rapped upon the wood.

Reek jumped and clutched the fur blanket, pulling it up to his chin. “Alyn?”

Ramsay pushed the door open and leaned in. “No sweetheart, it’s me. Alyn said I could see you for a few minutes then again tomorrow at breakfast.” He waited warily for his Reek’s reaction.

“Master?” He chewed his dry lip and cleared his throat. “You-are you… upset?”

Ramsay shook his head and spoke gently as he came in and shut the door. “No, Reek, Master is not upset. I love you, I have missed you and I have been worried sick for you.” He went over to the bed, intending to calmly sit down and speak with Reek. Instead, he sat down and hugged Reek to himself, trying not to cry like a baby.


	24. Above the Crashing Waves

“I have missed you so much I love you so much. Tell me you are still mine? My good boy, my sweet Reek.” Ramsay sounded as if he were begging but couldn’t stop himself.

“Always, Master. I’m yours forever,” Reek said softly once he caught his breath. “I  need you. I’m so scared and confused. Everything overwhelms me. I’m so sorry, Master. I’m sorry-” he gulped and curled up tightly into Ramsay’s chest. “I’ll be good. I’m sorry, I said _horrible_ things. Please, tell me what to do. I want to be your good puppy again! I need you and I’m sorry about everything- the beach.” His shoulders shook as he was racked with sobs.

Ramsay warmed inside and rocked his boy, kissing his hair, sniffing it. “Hush, my good boy, my wonderful good puppy. You are forgiven everything that happened while you were so sick. I’m going to help you. Alyn will help you. Master will help make it all better. I love you so much, sweet puppy. My Reek…”

He wondered if it was too soon to put a collar back on his boy when in private.

“ _Master_ ,” Reek whimpered. He nuzzled into Ramsay’s strength and his wrecked, aching muscles eased for the first time since he was weaned off the bottle. He wondered how long it had been, but decided he’d rather not know. “I’m so glad you came for me. No one else would have.” He wiped his eyes and his voice cracked. “I’m so glad you’re here. I need you. I want to make you happy again.” He blinked his red but focused eyes. “Don’t leave, please? Can’t you stay with me tonight, Master?”

Ramsay moaned and hugged Reek harder. “Alyn will say no, but fuck him. Yes, I won’t leave you, honey. Let me get us both undressed, we can snuggle all night.” Ramsay gave Reek another kiss on those sweaty curls then got up to undress.

Reek grinned through his tears. “Thank you. I missed you. I missed myself.” He frowned and blushed then rubbed his forehead. “I mean… trying to be someone else and I needed to drink just to talk to people, just to look at them. I don’t fit in that Ironborn mask very well any longer.” He pulled his tunic up over his head, embarrassed at how thin he was. It was all a little too much like before… the first time Ramsay dried him out. But Ramsay wasn’t angry now and Reek wasn’t fighting. He sighed and sank back into the bed. “What do we do now? Is everything ok? Did you meet those men?” He stopped and watched Ramsay’s shirt drop. “Did you get hurt?”

Ramsay smirked as he took off his pants. “No, I am fine. So many questions! What do we do now? We make sure you are getting better. Well rested, well fed and cared for until you are ready to do more. Until Alyn says, really. Everything is fine. I met those men. I kept two young little brats. Ardan and Emory. Their little brother and mother are provided for and protected now by Euron. One of the boys..Ardan is in a cell with Skinner as his companion and trainer. Emory took a flaying, just a teensy one for rudeness like a true man, even if he is a little tiny thing. I have allowed him to use a guest room, he is chained by his ankle, sleeping with help from milk of the poppy. I think I shall have both Damon and Alyn help me with this one. I am too merciful with him perhaps.”

“Emory?” Theon said flatly. “I gave him a stipend. What else does he want?” He couldn’t hide a deep frown. “Damon should handle him _completely._ He’ll only upset you. He’s an angry young man. Don’t waste your time, Master. If he needs more help, I’ll see my cousin myself.” He took Ramsay’s hand and pulled a little too hard. “Come to bed, please?”

Ramsay smiled as he heard the bit of jealousy in there, not to mention the actual anger. “Euron needs sons to captain his ships, Reek. These are Euron’s sons now and they are being trained to be dreaded sea captains under my rule. I am giving them a mix of my old training along with a dash of what Euron would actually do. I swear to you, I will not rape or force them to pleasure me in any way. I am not making pets, honey….Skinner has complete control over Ardan, in fact, I sort of gave Skinner ownership of the boy. As for Emory, I will take your advice because I believe you are correct. Damon would be the best to deal with him. I lost my temper a little which led me to flaying. Then he cried and begged his father’s forgiveness. But we both know it won’t last...once he feels better it will start again. Damon is the perfect bully for this brat. And his whip will leave far less damage than my blade. Also, I would actually like it if you would deal with him as you see fit. I trust your instincts.”

“He’ll want to see you,” Reek pouted. “He’ll want your approval more than ships or money.”

“No. He will want to see and get approval from Euron. His father. The attraction there is very different than ours, love. He doesn’t want to fuck me, I don’t want to fuck him. He also doesn’t love me and I don’t love him. It is NOTHING like us at all, Reek. I would marry you if such a thing was allowed, puppy. Remember Balon, remember Roose? Recall how we were so desperate so achingly fucking needy for a single word of praise from our fathers?”

Reek nodded and pulled Ramsay on top of him. “He’s very pretty, isn’t he? And desperate, and needy, and he worships you but he doesn’t want to.” Reek rolled his lips together and swallowed. “But I’ll do _anything_ for you. I _want_ to!” He ran his hands up Ramsay’s jaw into his thick hair. “I’m more desperate, I need you more.”

Ramsay winced and slowly spoke.

“Reek...we promised to be honest with each other and to not even hide things anymore. So here is the truth. When I got him on that cross and saw that naked, arrogant boy, it really wasn’t like you at all. I got excited, yes. But I wanted to flay him alive, Reek. At first, I...I just wanted to let him scream, tendons all stretched out as he begged for mercy for death. I wanted to flay and flay. Not fuck him. Not train him. Flay him to death. I got ahold of myself before Damon cleared his throat to stop me. I...it was just so tempting if that makes sense. But I had promised you and since you were able to keep your end..I controlled myself. I stuck to the plan. And I showed mercy by not going with my instincts. For you, Reek. I will NEVER love another. Only you and it’s because of you that little brat is alive and begging to please both of us. And yes, he mentioned his prince.”

Reek smiled bashfully. “I’m so glad you didn’t kill him for me, Master. You’re so kind and merciful to me. What can I do? Tell me what you want me to do for you, please?” He bit his lip and smiled. “He’s pretty, there are lots of pretty people who would kill their mother to sleep with you, but I don’t think you could find anyone as dedicated to your pleasure as I am.” He brought Ramsay’s hand to his face and rubbed his cheek into it. “Master, _please. I need you_.” He took Ramsay’s index finger into his mouth and rolled his wet tongue around it.

Ramsay gasped, then leaned down and bit gently into Reek’s earlobe. He released it and whispered, “you keep telling me how pretty that boy is...do you think he is very pretty, Reek? Would you like him as a fuck toy? I’d give him to you if you want a little pet of your own, I would give you anything I ever can within reason. I bet he would want to please his Prince. And if he was reluctant, I can hold him for you, make sure that he obeyed your every order. Though I am positive you could handle that brat on your own.”

His hand crept along the thin chest and down past the slightly caved stomach. Fingers caressed Reek’s hard silky length lightly. “Oh, do you like that thought, sweetheart? I mean it, I would give you anything I can. If you wish to have some fun with that boy, I would not deny you. I would, however, tell you that I will expect to hear every detail of your experience, then I will fuck you wildly to it until we both orgasm harder than you did with that fuck toy.”

Reek exhaled slowly and pulled Ramsay down for a deep kiss. He pulled away, still more hungry. “Only you. Please, I want to obey you. I need… I’m scared of every moment and they just stretch out ahead relentlessly. I don’t want my past or my thoughts or any of me. I just…” he shook his head and closed his eyes. “I need you to tell me what to do. Please, let me be good for you. I need-” he wrapped his arms and legs around Ramsay, so scared he’d leave or someone would come in to take him away forever. “If you want to do that, I would. I want to do everything under your instruction,” he whispered. That was a depraved thing to say, it wasn’t fair to the boy, but _anything, anything._

“If you would like to take down the boy a peg that way, then I promise to help you get the best fun and pleasure out of him for you. I will always guide you, baby, I am never going to leave you, Reek. I need you too, puppy, come be my good boy and let Master play with his eager, trembling, lovely fragile boy.” Reek rolled onto his stomach. Ramsay licked and bit at Reek’s neck as his hands ran down his boy’s back and then cupped his slight buttocks tightly. “Do you want Master to fuck you, Reek? Do you want Master to touch your cock? Do you want Master’s cock to fuck you hard and deep, sweet, good boy?”

 _“Please_ , Master. Please fuck your Reek.”  He looked over his shoulder and drew deep breaths through parted lips. “I need you. I want you, _please_.” He keened into Ramsay’s touch. A calm but deep euphoria began to comfort him, it felt like reclining into a warm bath. His muscles eased all over. Reek had almost forgotten, or maybe stopped believing, that the pain would ever end.

“Such a good boy, my good puppy...such a good boy for your Master. Look at how you need me...I will always take care of my boy...Master will make it all better for you, good, lovely puppy….are you my needy bitch in heat, sweetie? Hmm...does my little bitch need Master?” Ramsay slowly crawled over his boy, needing to feel the skin, the hot real flesh of the fragile boy he loves. His teeth graze, his tongue tastes and his lips rub along the flesh, his body drags along the slender frame.

Reek squirmed and tried to maneuver Ramsay’s cock between his cheeks by wiggling his hips. “I’m your desperate wanton bitch in heat, please, _please,_ fuck your puppy.” His head rolled to expose his neck and he bit his lip hard enough to make it go white.

Ramsay moaned and reached forward to palm Reek’s hard, weeping cock. “It has been awhile, you’ll need a bit of lubrication. But it still might hurt a little. I don’t think you mind that, though, do you, sweet, needy puppy?” He wiped Reek’s precum onto his own cock and gently began to nudge himself into his tight, so very hot boy.Ramsay hissed, he wanted so badly to just force his way in and listen to Reek cry and scream and no. No. He was better than that, for Reek he has to be the better man. Not a lesson his father would ever approve of. “I love you, puppy. Are you okay, my good boy? Is it too much, do you need Master to stop, Reek?”It nearly made him weep to say it and he hoped Reek understood just how much his Master suffers in his devoted love.

“No!” Reek’s abused bottom lip trembled. “Please don’t stop! I’ll be good, Master. My heart will ignite and I’ll die if you stop.” He looked over his shoulder apologetically then his eyes rolled and jaw sank as he pushed himself back onto his Master’s cock. “ _Oh…_ please.”

“Fuck...Reek….good boy, you are my best boy I have ever fucked...only boy I have ever owned and fucking loved. Just you, puppy.” Ramsay grabbed his boy’s hips and sank deeper.

He gave a quick, somewhat gentle thrust towards  his puppy’s little secret button. The little greedy bundle that only makes Reek happy when Ramsay’s cock touches it. Otherwise, that little bundle always seemed to be clever in its greedy way and hide from anyone else that ever tried to play with Theon before Ramsay found him. Another thrust, a little harder and deeper, ah, there was that button.

Reek moaned into the bed and arched his back more to open himself further. “Yes, yes, Master. Please, don’t stop. Please, I’ll be a good puppy,” he cried and clawed at the furs tickling his sensitive skin.

“Gods, yes, good puppy. You are such a good boy for Master, always, sweetie. Be a good boy for Master. Let the pain feel as good as the pleasure, my good boy. Obey me, Reek, my good boy likes both, doesn’t he? It is such a good thing to hear and feel for me, puppy. I love it when you surrender so sweetly to everything your Master wishes.” Ramsay spoke in the sweetest voice with only a touch of sharp blade in it.

He gently began to lay over his boy and then he licked at the scar on the back of Reek’s neck. Those scarred perfect teeth marks. And Ramsay whispered, “I love you. You belong to me. Mine forever. Do not EVER forget it.” Ramsay sank his teeth into the marks, breaking flesh just enough to taste blood. At the same time, he thrust hard into the button, then twice more, hard and fast. One hand was stroking hard at Reek’s stiff cock.

Reek cried out then groaned and sighed. “Master… yours, yours, always. Oh, fuck.” He rubbed his back against Ramsay’s stomach. It felt so right, so safe, he felt so owned and wanted. He started crying with something deeper than release. “I love you, Master. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry. I was so bad.” He sniffed and gave himself permission to indulge in the comfort of his Master completely engulf him. “I need you to hurt me, like this. Please, don’t stop, I’m alright. I’ll be good for you.”

“Listen, sweet puppy. You were not bad, you were sick. You are my good boy, I know you are and I love you.” Ramsay licked the blood from the broken scars, but he still didn’t thrust again. Not yet.

As he licked the blood he would stop and whisper, “I love you. I love you my good boy, my puppy. I love you. I am going to hurt you in ways you like, Reek. I want you to understand that, honey. I only want to hurt you when you wish to be hurt. Master is going to try very hard to keep to that. I will make mistakes, I will lose my temper, but in bed I swear I will only EVER hurt you to make you happy. Do you understand that, my good boy?”

“Yes, Master.” Reek pushed up on his elbows to twist and kiss Ramsay’s chin. “Thank you, Master. You’re so good to your puppy.” He rubbed his face into Ramsay’s and whimpered, rutting gently against him.

 


	25. Drowned and Reborn

“Good boy...aww, my poor baby. You need it so bad, don’t you? My good boy, Master will make it better. Is this better, sweet puppy? Does my needy bitch in heat need even more?” Ramsay teased as his hand stroked lightly at Reek’s cock as he gave three tiny thrusts that just brushed by Reek’s pulsing, greedy button.

Reek kicked out a little, like his feet were stamping ground that wasn’t there. “Oh, please!” He started crying and dropped his head. “Please? Please! I’ll be good! I’ll crawl for you, I’ll wear your collar, you can cut me or hit me,   _please, please, please_ , Master!” He collapsed back onto the bed and whimpered up at Ramsay with a distraught, pretty pout. “You’re so hard, you’re so big, you smell so good, your muscles are all around me then you talk and your voice makes me crazy before your words obliterate me. I need you to fuck me, please, Master! What can I do?”

Ramsay groaned and had to force himself not to just fall into the dark abyss, not just yet. Not after what Reek said. He reached out fast and grabbed the collar that was still on the dresser. Then he yanked his slender boy up by his neck and wrapped the leather tightly around it. It was just loose enough for his boy to breathe without too much difficulty.

Using the end of the collar like a leash, Ramsay pulled his boy up to his knees as Ramsay thrust hard and savage into his boy. He growled, “You are mine and damn right you will wear my fucking collar! Tell me who owns you? Say it!”

He used one hand to keep hold of Reek’s throat and his other stroked Reek hard. Ramsay fucked Reek hard, brutally hitting into that greedy button that seemed to swell bigger, pulsing hot. Ramsay fucked him as if he were ruthlessly spanking him. As if he were flaying him alive. “Who owns you? Who’s collar are you wearing?”

“YOU! You own me, Master! Ramsay owns his Reek, Master! Fuck!” It hurt, it was frightening and he was peaking, sure to lose his mind in a burst that would shatter the world. “I’m your bitch, Master! I wear your collar! Ah-” he sucked his stomach in trying not to shoot his hot seed all over their bed before he had permission. His eyes rolled up to the ceiling and he sucked in air bobbing his jaw, unable to ask in his dumb rapture.

Ramsay shuddered as he felt Reek barely able to hold on, he almost went at that lovely, dumb trusting, needing, desperate too thin puppy face. “My good boy, poor poor needy bitch. Good boy, Master’s lovely, needy Reek. Go on, good boy, scream for me and come very hard. Let it hurt and feel so good while Master fills your ass nice and hot. Go on, good bitch.”

He tugged hard at the collar, forcing Reek nearly straight up, impaling him hard on his cock. Reek’s ass rested on Ramsay’s thighs and Ramsay kept thrusting upwards, ruthlessly stabbing, flaying, torturing, inflaming that greedy button letting the little button cunt get what it deserves.

Ramsay’s large hand was tight on Reek’s cock. The greedy grip was stroking in hard thrusts, forcing Reek’s seed forth. Every move Ramsay made was an order, a command, a sweet thrust that was a stroke of needed, merciful pain.

Reek screamed his Master’s name then became rigid in his embrace as come shot from the dick his Master was controlling. He sighed and let his head fall back onto Ramsay’s shoulder. “ _Thank you._ ” He went limp and kept riding waves of dizzy ecstasy as Ramsay thrust into him, taking him completely, taking the pain and worry away.

Ramsay whispered, “Good boy.” Then he let go of Reek’s limp, twitching cock to wrap his arm around his boy’s waist. He let the collar slide down so he could clutch the fragile neck in his hand and he squeezed tightly. Not enough to strangle Reek, but enough to restrict his breathing a bit more than the collar had. He pushed Reek to his knees, leaning forward.

“Let my hands hold you up, baby, lean into my grip and go limp. Good boy, Reek, such a good boy. Fucked you limp, let Master hold you and come hard in my poor fragile boy.” He groaned and slammed hard into his boy. “Just let Master fuck you so hard until I scream as hard as my little bitch did. Let Master move you, just stay still and take it for me, sweet puppy.”

“Uh.. huh,” Reek exhaled. He could hardly even bob his head or completely understand what Ramsay was saying. It didn’t even feel like he had a body, just this experience his Master gave to him. His half closed glazed over eyes rolled a little trying to collect some information about what was happening before he sighed and moaned letting them close and blink open.

“Hush...good boy...Master’s pet...good boy, just take my cock, just let Master fuck you so hard.” Ramsay pulled nearly all the way out of Reek, so slow and careful. Then he snarled and rammed hard into his boy. He began to fuck Reek as if he would kill him this way. His hand tightened on Reek’s throat, his teeth sunk into a shoulder, the arm around Reek’s stomach helped force the limp, light boy like a fuck toy on Ramsay’s cock.

“Mine..my needy little bitch, my Reek, all mine. Good boy, don’t fight it, just let Master fucking own you. Take it, sweet puppy, my good little bitch, Master’s good, good boy...fuck, fuck! Take it, Reek, just let Master fill you up, thank me for coming in you, puppy.”

Ramsay was panting and he was pressing hard now into his boy and he howled. As his seed filled his Reek, Ramsay had an orgasm that truly was painful in it’s glory and he found himself weeping. “Ahh gods! Yes, please Reek, take it and oh, sweet mother of...FUCK!”

To his utter shock and pleasure, Ramsay was hit again with the waves of darkly sweet swelling and he shuddered on Reek. His tears fell upon Reek’s skin as Ramsay whined and pressed so hard against his boy unable to stop the whimpering as he couldn’t find the end to this ecstasy, nor did he want to.

“Th-thank you, for c-coming in your bitch, Master,” Reek croaked out. He sucked in air sharply. “Ohh, Master. Oh, fuck.” Tremors of helpless pleasure ran through him with peaks of panic. He exhaled in stammering bursts as Ramsay constricted around him. “Mmmm, _Master_.”

Ramsay whined and snarled out, “I love you, fuck, you are mine, even if I hurt you, even if I fuck up...you are mine. Don’t you EVER try to leave me, or I’ll chain your collar with a leash that is attached to my belt. Mine, mine, my bitch, my good….uh…” He collapsed on his boy for a moment, released from the intense orgasm. Every part of him was trembling as if he were a newborn deer. He tried to throw himself to the side so not to crush his boy.

“Uh huh,” Reek acquiesced dutifully, “to your belt, I will… parade me… fine… just keep me until I die.” He yawned and groped around for Ramsay to crawl into and sleep against.

Ramsay gave a tired chuckle and wrapped his arms around Reek to hug him and nuzzle his hair. Then he reached out one arm and grabbed the collar. He pulled Reek’s head up by his hair, not to hurt but to enforce. Once Reek’s slender throat was bared to him, Ramsay kissed and licked it, nipping at it. Then he sighed and wrapped the leather collar back around his boy’s neck. He moved as if he were performing a delicate surgery, staring into his boy’s eyes the whole time.

Reek watched him with dazed awe then smiled in his goofy guileless way. “Hello.”

Ramsay felt himself melt and he gave a stupid smile back as he clicked the collar on his boy’s neck. “Hello, puppy.” He pulled Reek to him by the collar and softly kissed him, then sniffed and nipped at the slender neck.

“I will never ever let my puppy get lost again. My good boy. I love you, I found you and I claim you as my own...forever. I am pledged to you and you to me. We cannot live without each other, puppy. You need a good owner and a Master who knows what you need. And I need a good boy, a needy bitch and a puppy that wants a Master who loves him so much it hurts.”

Reek nodded gravely and whispered, “ _Yes_ ,” like he was praying. “I want to be your good puppy, your needy bitch. I need you to own me and love me. I love you, Ramsay. I’ll do anything for you. I want to.”

He pulled his boy’s head down onto his chest so he wouldn’t see Ramsay wiping away the tears. Which is stupid since Reek must have seen the actual tears. Still, Ramsay pressed his head down, then wiped his eyes with one hand fast.

“Hush now, puppy. We can talk more tomorrow, sweet, good boy. We need to sleep it has been such a big day.I..I can’t take this much emotion, puppy. And I just want to hold you so much, just this, I dreamed of this, Reek.” Ramsay was already asleep as he said his puppy’s name.

 

Talli cringed from her seat on the small window ledge high up on the wall when she heard Alyn enter the room. It was her only sight to see besides this room that she hasn’t left since the day Lord Euron tricked her. This room was larger, warmer and the bed certainly more comfortable then the servants quarters, but it was a prison, just a comfy one.

She would sit on the chilly rock embrasure after Alyn would leave and stare at the ocean. Sometimes she saw servants, friends, or sailors go by and she dreamed of being out there with them. Not that Alyn was cruel to her, at least not the way he could be. Talli never dares to disobey, so he doesn’t hit or punish her.

But he won’t allow her to leave the room and he rapes her or uses her in other ways whenever he wishes. There is no thought if it hurts her, or if Talli wishes it. Nor would she dare to say a word of it. He is three times her size and she had seen the torture and death of other men by him when Euron first showed up. Talli doesn’t want to know what Alyn would do to a girl who didn’t obey or please him. She is still scared of him, terrified of Euron wanting to use her again too. Most of all, Talli is terrified that she will remain trapped in this room for the rest of her days.

Talli had been watching the moon rise so high and large, reflecting upon the water when Alyn entered. The only good thing is he had her dinner with him. At least she gets good meals, larger and better than ever as a servant of the kitchens. However, no matter how good the meal or how slow she ate and savoured it, Alyn would be waiting to pounce as soon as she is done.

He will speak sometimes of his day to her while she ate, other times he went straight to sleep for a while. But whether it was right away, or after a nap, Alyn would grab her and take his pleasure roughly. He spoke kindly to her and even used endearments and soothing tones..but he enjoyed seeing her cry, seeing her in pain or sometimes just maybe her helplessness might be what does it. During sex, he liked her distressed and scared.

Talli can handle that, she has dealt with sexual torment from men most of her life. What really bothered her was the imprisonment. To be held here for no other reason than to be a willing and always available sex toy. That was rapidly draining her sanity and physical strength. Talli curled tighter in the window for a minute before looking towards Alyn.

He beckoned her with one finger. “Come eat. I have something to ask you.” He slid her tray onto the smooth wooden table he’d gifted her. “I need to get you a serving girl or two. Who do you like and trust, Talli?” He rested one side of his jaw in his hand and ran a finger over the table’s smooth grain.

Ducking her head low, Talli jumped down and quickly walked over to the table. She sat down and picked up her spoon to eat the stew. “Uh...Gwyn is very nice to me, Master.. And there is a boy here who is really kind. I think he used to serve my King…” Talli spoke timidly before eating a first full spoonful of stew. When she finished the spoonful of stew, she broke a small piece of bread and chewed it.

“Shit… I don’t know if Gwyn is really serving anymore. We can ask tomorrow. I think the boy may be Severin. I’ll have to ask Lord Euron if he can be trusted.” Alyn leaned back and smiled. “You’ve been so good for me. I think you’ve earned a few privileges; servants to help you and for you to speak with, as I said. Maybe you could roam the tower as long as you never leave it. Tomorrow I thought we could try breaking our fasts in the King’s hall with Lord Euron, his men and their… companions. Servant’s could draw a bath for you tonight.”

Talli gasped then dropped her spoon into her stew. For the first time, she actually peeked up at Alyn’s eyes to see if it was some sort of cruel lie...a jape. When she saw it wasn’t, she leaped out of the chair.

Dropping to her knees in front of Alyn, Talli lowered her head, tears hitting the ground. “Oh, thank you! Thank you so much, Master! I swear I will be a good girl for you! Thank you for being so generous to me! A bath, too? I am so grateful!”

“Good girl, Talli.” He stroked her pretty hair to calm her. “Hush, darling girl. Eat your food. You have to keep up your strength. You’ll see that I have not and will not lie to you. I told you if you kept behaving I would give you more freedom. It will be easier to believe me in time, sweet girl. You’re always so good for me, since the moment I was gifted you.” Alyn gently pulled her up and guided her back into her seat. He stepped behind her and pushed in her chair. “I’m so glad you’re happy and grateful. I’m so proud of you. I think you should rest tonight.” He strolled back to his seat and studied her. “If you get overwhelmed tomorrow, just whisper it to me or touch my leg and I’ll take you back here we’re you’re safe. Here, did I get the right incense for you?” He handed her a small velvet bag.

Talli timidly took the bag and opened it with a small smile. “Yes, thank you, Master. You truly are so generous and nice. I am glad that you chose to have me…..”


	26. Collared With Kindness

She did truly like this part of her Master. The kind, protective, affectionate Master, it was the one that did make having to be locked in here tolerable. Now if she could only learn to enjoy the rest of it. But she was grateful it was him and not Euron. She thought of what Alyn said, that Euron will be there tomorrow. What if he wants to share her with Alyn again and she shuddered briefly at the thought.

Alyn frowned slightly. “Are you alright, Talli? You aren’t sick are you?”

Quickly, Talli shook her head. “I am fine, Master. Not sick at all. I just..had a bad thought and it made me shudder. I am very sorry, I am fine.” She shoved another spoonful of stew into her mouth.

Alyn twisted his mouth to one side. He didn’t care. Her problems weren’t his concern… unless she was sick. That _would_ be his responsibility… even the kennel master had a veterinarian on hand. He cleared his throat. He was just asking because he was curious. It was her job and pleasure to entertain him! Fuck it! “What made you worry, sweet girl? There aren’t rats in here are there?” He started looking all around for holes in the wall. “Spiders? I’ll remove them.” Well, so what? She was a wench, but a woman still and he was a man!

Talli somewhat melted that her Master would care she was afraid or upset over something. That was nearly unknown in her world. She raised her head again, giving a tiny peek up at Alyn. Her eyes filled with tears at the generous Master and then tried to figure out how to phrase what made her shudder, without lying or being offensive.   

“Master, you are too important to worry about my foolish fears. Please forgive me for having bothered you at all with my silliness. I..” Talli wiped her eyes and tried again.

“His Grace will be at breakfast...and I would of course obey any command, no matter what it was without any complaint ever...I would be a good girl...but His Grace...scares me very badly, Master.” Her voice was nearly a whisper when she finally stopped speaking and she was nearly curled, shaking in her chair, awaiting a punishment for speaking so out of turn.

Alyn nodded. He stared into the candlelight, thinking then snorted. “We’re all a little afraid of him. I think he’s a little afraid of himself as well.” He smirked and gently touched her hand. “He has his own devoted pet to play with now. That’s part of the reason I feel more comfortable letting you out a little now. That, and the fact that you have been so very good for me.” He shrugged and withdrew his hand.

“It should not be as awful as you imagine. I understand your fear, it has served you very well, believe me. You’re right to listen to your instincts. I may even have to put them to use one day when I know it’s safe.” He stood up abruptly. “Good. I’m glad you’re happy. I’ll send the little boy, he’s a good lad. You may take a bath tonight and I’ll come to fetch you in the morning. One day you will come to live with me. That’s what I’ve decided.” His mouth opened and closed, he seemed either at a loss as to what to say or to have forgotten what he was in the middle of saying.

Talli again melted. Even though his words are stiffly said, Talli heard the kindness and generosity within them. She leaped up and went to her knees in front of him and hugged his legs.

“Really? If I am good enough, you would even allow me to live with you? I will try even harder, Master. I will be the best, loyal slave to have ever served you, I swear it. I cannot ever possibly repay such generosity, Master. Thank you. I am the luckiest slave to have you as my owner.”

“Alright, alright,” Alyn said calmly but couldn’t keep himself from chuckling a little. “I don’t know how you could be any better, Talli. I don’t know how you can even be you.” He stroked her hair for a moment then snapped his fingers. “That’s very sweet, precious but now you have to eat. Finish your food, go on! No stalling tonight! You have to take a bath and… EAT I said!” He threw his hands up and left. “I’ll, see you in the morning,” he said quickly and slammed the door. _Gods be damned!_ He shook his head and berated himself for being such a fool, but smiled as he left.

Talli smiled as she ate fast, but blushed. He knew about her stalling all along. And tonight he was kind enough to not wait and roughly take her as usual. He was letting her have a real bath and rest. As if she were a proper lady or wife! It was overwhelming and so unreal it made her go between grinning and crying. That was that. Talli was going to have to learn to enjoy servicing Alyn, the kindest of Masters. One way or another.

Gwyn set the two plates full of potatoes and a freshly killed, roasted and seasoned chicken like they made it in the north for Damon, a smaller half of one for her. Humming to herself, she smiled when she heard the door open then slam shut.

Damon lumbered in with a grin on his face. “What is that smell? Oh gods, you made me a proper Northern dinner?” He picked up his wife and swung her about, gnawing at her neck. Then he plopped her into her own chair and sat with a loud creak and thud into his own. “I am so sick of the constant stews and every possible sea creature they can slaughter up at the Keep. Gods bless you for this meal, Gwyn!” He ripped into a chicken leg as if it were a lover then moaned at the flavors.

Gwyn giggled and tried some herself. “Well, this is my attempt anyhow. I’m sure it couldn’t be as good as your mother's, or most any Northern cook.” She nodded approvingly. “Not bad. A little dry, maybe, but it is my first time.”

Damon took another large bite then tried to speak as he chewed. “Id’s goow...reall...goow!” He washed it down with her homemade mead and he groaned in delight. “I wish I could stay here and eat all my meals at home. At least most days I can have my morning and night meals with you. Lunch I suffer, thinking of your food, nearly in tears..the whole time, sweetheart.”

“Dearest to me, don’t eat so quickly. Remember? You have pains in your chest when you do.” She shook her head and smiled hopelessly. “How are things at the tower? How is everyone?”

Damon tried to eat slower then spoke in between slower but very large bites. “Reek is doing so much better. He is clear of mind and sober but still real fragile. He let Ramsay visit with him and they stayed together as of when I left. They were asleep, cuddled together. I think they will be fine..they just need some time. Those teen boys are just fine, I know you worry for them. Ardan is being trained by Skinner..but I think it is more of a thing...Ramsay gave Ardan to Skinner...to train...and to keep. Skinner will turn him into a proper, respectful and dreaded captain for Euron. A real son that mimics the behavior of the better parts to Euron, a younger, slightly less crazy pirate.”  

He drank some more mead then continued. “Emory...that one is a spitfire and he will take more work. I am in charge of him, but Ramsay wants a hand in the training as well, I think he likes him. He does remind me of a younger, brash Theon. Don’t worry darling, I won’t rape the boy and I don’t think Ramsay will either. He wants the boy to be Euron’s son, not another Reek.” He finished the last potato on the plate and then leaned back in his chair.

Gwyn sighed and nodded slowly. “Good. I’m glad. It sounds like he’s trying to be a fairly kind but cunning leader. That’s what we need.” She drank some warm mead which she had grown to like.

With a mischievous grin, Damon drawled out, “Well, I guess the only way you can judge how everyone is really doing is to see it for yourself. You have been invited to the King’s Hall for a private breakfast with Euron, his nephew and his men plus their companions. Or really...it is Ramsay, Reek, Skinner, Ardan, Alyn and his new little slave, a girl named Talli. I have not met her, but Alyn seems to be more relaxed and happy now. I was worried for him dealing with Reek while he was so sick. It seemed to wear on him until he got this girl. She has been locked in a room, only Alyn has been near her. I made him decide to bring her to breakfast,so we can see this wondrous creature for ourselves. It is amazing to see Alyn anything but flat and grumpy. The only other thing I have really seen is his sadistic side.” Damon teased as he drank another cup of mead and enjoyed the warmth growing in his belly from it.

“Oh! Talli! Oh, please make him be nice to her? Could you? Would you- or you could take her as another salt wife for yourself! You will love her. She’s so kind, very smart but so…” naive wasn’t the right word, “childlike sometimes. Her big heart can blind her.” That had likely changed already. “I can see her tomorrow?”

Damon gave his girl a sympathetic look. “Of course you may see her tomorrow at breakfast. I will make sure Alyn let’s you have a proper visit after if you’d like too! I’ll tell him to go easy on her if he’ll listen. She belongs to him now though. You have to remember that. She is his slave, I can’t change that, honey. I’m sorry. I am sure I will like her though!”

 

Reek woke up, that was the first miracle, the second was Ramsay beside him.

Stretching, Ramsay blinked then grinned. “How are you feeling, Reek? We are having breakfast in the hall this morning. All your friends are waiting to see you, they miss you as much as I did. Well, no one could actually miss you the way I did...but you know what I mean, love.”

 _Other people?_ “Here? In our tower? Not in the Great Keep? Will you stay with me? Please?”

“Hush, sweet boy, I will be with you the whole time, of course. You can do this with me, like a good boy, can’t you? It will only be the boys and their pets, love. No one else, I swear it. Oh, and your servant, well, our servant, Severin. He has been well behaved and well cared for. Severin has been hoping to see you and he is invited to eat with us. That is all, honey. No one that isn’t safe to you, Reek. I’ll help you the whole time, sweetie.” Ramsay cooed and hugged his boy tight, rubbing his back.

Reek sighed as his shoulders eased. He nodded against Ramsay’s chest. “Yes, I am able, as long as I can stay by your side,” he said softly.

“Good boy.” Ramsay kissed his boy’s lips gently then slid his nose down the fine jawline until he reached that slender neck. He gave a firm but loving bite.

Reek hummed and pressed gently into Ramsay’s warm mouth smiling. Nothing could be worse than what he’d been through already. Nothing was worse than being separated from this. That made him feel a little braver.

Severin helped set the hall then ushered the servants out. He waited for everyone to file in so he could serve as cup-bearer and see Prince Theon at last. He felt so nervous, he couldn’t stay still and found himself making the servants hurry for no real reason.

Talli had brushed her hair as much as she could, her outfit was clean and crisp, she smoothed it over and over nervously. Even as they walked into the Hall, Talli was so careful to keep her head low, to stay just behind Alyn, trying to be invisible and perfect. She was terrified of messing this golden chance up..what if she made a mistake and her Master took away all of the other small privileges over it?

“Have you ever seen the Sea Tower? It’s worse than a dungeon. What do you think? How did you like those swaying bridges?” He teased leaning into her and tickling her ribs.

With a small giggle that surprised her, Talli whispered, “I like the bridges there, Master. When I was a small girl, others were afraid of being so high up and swaying...but it felt like I was flying over the sea and rocks. As if I were some...powerful being in nature…”

“Were you one of those people kidnapped from Westeros? Or did you always live here on these terrible islands?” He opened the heavy wood and oiled iron door for her and pushed her though by the small of her back before following with his hand on the back of her neck.

Talli gasped but at the same time, her thin voice tried to reply. “Uh, my mother was brought here from Mereen. I was born here, I do not know who my father is..but I was raised in the kitchens where my mother worked. When she passed away, I was kindly given her position. Since I had been doing it for her when she first took ill a year before she died.”

Nervously, Talli walked with Alyn to the table and she didn’t dare to look up at anyone there. She found herself clutching Alyn’s arm tightly and was embarrassed at it. Oh, gods, she is screwing it up already!

Alyn pulled her chair out and pushed it in. “That’s nice,” he murmured. “It’s hard to lose a mother, especially when she’s your whole home and family. Lord Euron gave my mother a bit of land in some wood’s he’d terrorized into submission. I used to send her my wages since my Lord took me into his keep… and then onto his ship, then here in the end.” Alyn frowned and waved Severin over. “Mead, please. Talli?”

Talli has never been offered a drink to be poured by a servant, never mind sit at the high table. She nodded timidly, peeking up at Alyn to make sure it was correct. “Yes please, Master. Th..Thank you, Severin.” She wrung her hands, aching to leap up and do it herself out of sheer instinct.

Severin smiled like a gentleman twice his age and nodded to her slightly. They had always gotten on quite well in what little free time they had spent around one another.

“Talli!” Gwyn ran over and threw her arms around Talli’s neck. “We should speak after the meal.” She knelt by Talli and took both her hands. “I have so much to tell and ask you. I have a little house now! I’d so love for both of you to come see us. Look how lovely she is, Damon!”

Turning bright pink both with happiness to see Gwyn and with fear of Alyn being upset with another taking her attention, Talli smiled a little at her kind friend. “Hi, Gwyn. I am so glad you are happy and settled well. I..I don’t know about talking or visiting. You would have to ask my Master’s permission first.” She moved back a tiny bit so she was against Alyn, but Talli continued to hold Gwyn’s hands.

 


	27. Sharp Edges

“Huh.” What a strange thought. Alyn already knew what Damon’s house looked like, he didn’t see much of a reason to see it again but it was a safe place to take Talli. “Maybe I would leave her in your care some day,” he mused and downed more warm mead. The spices reminded him of coming home to sit by the fire after a good hunt.

Talli smiled that her Master would ever even consider such a wonderful thing and felt warm. She peeked up at him and smiled then lay her head briefly upon his arm before turning to timidly speak with Gwyn.

“Do you see how lucky I am?” She whispered to Gwyn. “He is rough, aye, but he is more generous and caring than any man I have ever dealt with. I was so scared...he still scares me. But...I hope we can talk privately for a little while later on. Oh, that giant..he is your husband?”

Gwyn’s giggled like silver bells. She patted Talli’s thigh and stood to take her leave of them. “Yes, later then.” She curtsied slightly for Alyn and gave him a wink.

Alyn frowned and shook his head slightly. The hell did that mean?

Damon boomed out from his seat, “Alyn! You remember my lovely Gwyn, who just curtsied so nicely for you! But I don’t know who your girl is? Slave or not, she has a name, right?” Talli cringed at the shouting voice and found herself nearly in Alyn’s lap at it.

Alyn sighed in exasperation and rolled his eyes to look at Talli sympathetically. “I know. Believe me. This is the horse shit I deal with _all the time._ It was even worse before he abducted your sweet friend. Screaming across the room like a drunken jester…” Alyn covered his face and whispered. “ _Maybe if we ignore him something shiny will divert his attention.”_

Talli giggled again then tried to sit up and sip at her mead, but she still kept her side pressed against Alyn’s.

 

Ramsay pretended he wasn’t frustrated, he has been dressing Reek, then holding Reek’s hair as he threw up with nerves. He rubbed his boy’s back and spoke in soothing tones. He finished getting himself and Reek ready while the puppy spewed forth reasons,excuses and downright pleading not to go.  

Remaining firm but loving Ramsay continued to try and steer his pet out the door. When Reek balked at the doorway, Ramsay finally had enough. He picked up Reek like a nervous bride and carried him towards the Great Hall. “You’d better get yourself under control, or I’ll have to carry you inside like this, sweet puppy.”

Reek hid his face in the crook of Ramsay’s neck. “I’m sorry,” he whimpered. “What if they try to talk to me? I don’t have to talk, do I? Please don’t leave me.” Reek wrapped his trembling arms around Ramsay’s neck and practiced saying, _I can walk, Master,_ in his head.

When Ramsay stopped to open the heavy dining hall doors, Reek cleared his tight throat with some effort and forced the words out in a rush.

Ramsay smiled and whispered, “There is my good boy.” He put Reek down but kept hold of him for a moment. “Take a deep breath, Reek. I will stay with you the entire time. I won’t leave you for a second. They all understand that you have been unwell. No one will care if you just nod and listen. No one will care if you do not talk. I can speak for you if you want me to. You can even whisper to me and I’ll tell them what you say. Now, one more deep breath and we will go in.”

“Yes,” Reek mumbled. He forced himself to stand up straight and slipped his hand into Ramsay’s. He gave a nod, facing the door, then pushed through it, pulling Ramsay along with him.

Ramsay strode into the hall as if Reek wasn’t shaking like a leaf. With a sharp grin, he led his boy to a very ornate high chair. Ramsay pushed in Reek then sat next to him in his own chair, slightly larger.

Raising his eyebrows, Ramsay looked over at Severin. “Please tell the servants to bring our breakfast. Then take your seat, boy. You were invited to break bread with your betters, not serve today.” Curling an arm around Reek’s thin shoulders, Ramsay looked over at Damon and grinned.

Severin’s eyes popped open. “Thank you, Your Grace!”

Damon grinned back then he nodded and softly said, “Nice to see you back among the living, Reek.”

Reek glanced at Damon coolly without responding.

“Pardon me,” Ardan rumbled. “I would pay my respects to my cousin.” He stood and straightened his Braavosi tunic.

Skinner watched with a sharp but proud eye and gave a nod. “You will not trouble him for long. Make it quick, boy.” Ramsay glared at Damon who then looked over at his wife, confused. “What did I do?” he whispered into her ear.

“I think Theon is rather _fragile_ right now, love. He may not be ready for jests, or even up to much conversation.” Gwyn rubbed her hand over Damon’s. She felt no one understood how sweet he really was but herself. Damon grinned down at his little wife and kissed her head. “I’ll leave him be then.”

Ramsay gestured to the servant with the pitchers of juice and steaming cups of tea. He made sure his pet had both beverages before him. Keeping his arm around Reek, he watched Ardan coming towards them. He had a wary and protective gleam in his icy eye and his lips formed into a smirk. “Good morning, son.”

That stopped Ardan where he was, a few feet from their table. “Your Grace.” He made a quick but graceful bow of his head. “Prince Theon.”

Theon tilted his head so slightly and sat up straighter. “Ardan. Has it been so long? You’re a man already. I thought you were just a boy when I last saw you.”

Ardan grinned. “You were very kind. My family will always be grateful. I’d love to show you my fleet. When can I see you?”

“Well…” Reek faltered, falling right out of his role. “I’ve been ill. Perhaps in a week’s time…” he looked to Ramsay for help.

With a wicked smile, Ramsay spoke. “Why hasn’t my son greeted me yet? He is already promising fleets to the prince rather than greeting his very own father. I am not sure that is behavior I wish for in my heir.”

Skinner narrowed his eyes at Ardan. “I said to be respectful and quick. Not rude to your father and overwhelming to a sick prince.”

Ardan’s olive complexion paled and his square jaw flexed. “Please forgive me, my Lord, I meant to greet you with my bow. I was… addressing you as Your Grace and my cousin as my Prince.”

Ramsay slowly leaned forward and licked his lips, tasting the rancid blue wax and grinned as if he were about to eat the boy. “Let me help you. If I say good morning son, you would say, what?”

Ardan quickly glanced at Theon who subtly nodded then at Skinner. The man nodded as well and glared expectantly at Ardan.

Ardan clasped his hands behind his back. “Good morning, Lord Father,” he said respectfully with a slight dip of his head.

Ramsay beamed and clapped his hands once. “Excellent! You may call me Your Grace all the time, but we are in private. And you are my son and should act like it and not be reluctant to admit it. Now you may go sit and eat.”

Ardan’s hard face looked even younger when his eyes grew round. “Yes… thank you, Father.” He turned slowly and seemed somewhat confused on his way back to his seat. He pulled his chair a little further from Skinner and raised an eyebrow at the juice in front of him. It wasn’t too bad.

Skinner rolled his eyes and yanked the boy’s chair back where it had been. “Don’t get cocky. Drink your juice like a good boy.” He whispered heavily into Ardan’s ear.

The food began to arrive, the servants putting trays and bowls upon the table. Ramsay sighed and drawled out, “Severin, you are not serving tonight, stop fluttering about the maids and leave them be. I have set your seat on the corner, right near your Prince, come and sit with him.”

Theon leaned over to whisper, “Look! He found a little maiden he likes!” He pulled back and grinned at Ramsay trying not to laugh. He felt like they shared an inexplicable ownership or concern for the boy, and needed Ramsay to notice this development as well.

Ramsay gave a small chuckle and hugged Reek fast. “He blushes just like her! We shall have to watch him. He might be a dramatic romantic.”

Severin ran over, weaving through the servers. He dropped into his chair so fast he nearly crashed into his Prince. “Ah! Look at his eyes! He’s all there and everything!” He grinned at Ramsay.

Theon snorted and rubbed his mess of hair before looking away and stabbing his food.

Ramsay smiled back at Severin. “Yes, he is. Remember I told you that Prince Theon is still quite fragile. So just sit down and he will speak with you in time, be patient. In the meantime, look at all the food that could be on your plate first this very minute! Fill your plate and eat your fill, boy!”

Severin nodded and gave Euron a wink. “Oh! More chowder!” Severin hummed a song to himself and dug into his bread bowl. “Delicious," he commented to a blushing girl who offered a basket of Dornish dates. He gave her a wide grin.

Rolling his eyes, Ramsay nudged Reek conspiratorially. “Oh gods…”

Reek smirked and leaned into Ramsay’s shoulder just enough to feel his warmth.

Alyn sighed, grumbling. “I don’t think he’s ready for this,” he confided to Talli. “I’ve been trying to help the pale Prince over there with his affliction.”

Talli gave a look of sympathy to both Theon and her Master then leaned very close to whisper. “I have seen men with bottle sickness before. I pity them. I am glad that our Prince had you to save him, Master.”

“We’ll see,” Alyn said dryly. He laid his arm over the back of her chair. “I think our friend Gwyn managed to stop Damon’s mouth without sewing his lips shut. Is she a witch? Tell me the truth.” He smirked leaning closer.

Giggling, Talli shook her head. “Gwyn has a natural talent for making others do her will...she somehow sweetly talks all of us into things. Thank goodness she uses her powers for good things?” Talli found herself leaning closer and snuggling into Alyn. She surprised herself and hoped it didn’t offend her Master.

“What do you use your powers of persuasion for?” he asked in a low, soft growl.

Gasping, Talli whispered, “I have no powers, Master. You have all the power, not me.”

Alyn pulled back a little to study her. He ran his fingers through her hair. “It’s not your fault, what you do to me. None of this is your fault. Eat some food, Talli. When you’re done you should talk to your friends. I’m sure you’ve missed them,” he said softly.

Talli looked up meekly and tried not to cry in gratitude. “Yes Master. Thank you so much.” She pressed against him as she started to try and mimic the behavior of the others as she ate.

Ramsay leaned into Reek’s ear. “You need to eat at least something small and finish one full glass of juice or tea.”

Reek pursed his lips and drank his tea. “Mmm, that’s very nice, actually. I like the spice and honey.”

“It is good.” Ramsay snapped at a maid to make more tea immediately. One of his hands went hidden behind Reek’s waist and he softly muttered, “Eat one thing and we can go if you’d like, honey.”

Reek at a biscuit. It wasn’t so hard with the tea to wash it down. He ventured to eat some chowder and had to stop himself from spitting it out when he laughed. He covered his mouth with his napkin and swallowed. “Mmm,” he smirked. “Boy, that is… quite salty when one is sober.” He ran his tongue over his teeth  and pushed his lips together to keep from being rude to the poor, terrified servants. He gave Ramsay a guilty sideways glance.

Ramsay smirked and he replied, “When you are feeling well, you may change the kitchen cooks if you wish it. They are after all, our servants."

Reek smiled. “It doesn’t matter.”

“If the food is bad, you won’t eat it. So when you feel ready we shall have an island competition, the one person who can make a meal that you will orgasm over and eat at least half of...that person will be our new cook.” Ramsay announced and grinned at the staff. “Pass that around to all you know. That Prince Theon is looking for a special cook. A personal cook of his own.” Ramsay sipped his juice and smirked.

“Severin, are you enjoying your meal?” Ramsay asked politely. “And I assume you have met Talli and Gwyn before?”

“Oh, yes, m’lord! They are very nice! This food is the best ever in my whole life!”

Ramsay smirked and nodded. “Good, I am glad you are enjoying it, boy. You work very hard to care for myself and Prince Theon. You deserve a small reward for it. In fact, for now on, you will break your fast with us and sup with us in the evening. Does that sound good, Prince Theon?”

Theon smirked warmly. “Yes, Your Grace.” He glanced at Severin who was smiling too brightly for such a dark world. It made Theon happy. “I wouldn’t mind very much.” He managed to eat more chowder as Severin went on and on about how great they, and the hall, and the food, and everything was. Just as Theon began to tense from the onslaught of chatter, Severin shut up and smiled like a sweet little fool, daydreaming.

Theon sighed and pushed his plate away.

Ramsay noted that Reek managed to eat half and nodded. “Would you like us to return to our room, or do you want to go for a walk?”


	28. Connected by Gods and Fate

“Oh… a walk?” Theon hadn’t been outside for so long. He was almost afraid to go, but then Reek slid his hand into Ramsay’s. “Yes. Let’s walk a little,” he agreed softly and leaned in closer.

“Give me two weeks time and we can try to introduce the idea becoming a merchant port. I also thought, my uncle Rodrik could help establish a library for public use. We could have literate Ironborn go off copy scrolls and books and write out songs and tales from every port we trade at and bring them here. I had a lot of time to think about the way forward under the new Targaryen rule. I really think we make the Iron Islands stronger than ever. Peaceful, happy, and strong. I just have to write out a speech and outline a plan. I think you should deliver it. They love you, and people love to listen to you. You can make them all excited about their future again. Ardan and Emory are both bright, capable and well liked. You did well by us to take them in.”

Ramsay slung a heavy arm around Reek and pulled him closer as they left the table. “I will always do well by us...and look at you coming up with these wonderful ideas! I am so proud of you, Reek. I love you, my pet and my little prince.”

Reek leaned into Ramsay and let his head rest on Ramsay’s shoulder.  No one seemed to mind.

They were all talking fairly happily to one another. Damon was harassing Alyn somehow, who was making Talli laugh, who was making Gwyn smile. Even _Skinner_ laughed at some dry comment Alyn made.

“Have you ever been in a hall like this?” he whispered. “Is this… how it’s supposed to be?” He couldn’t say exactly what he meant, but the first word that came to mind was _safe._

Ramsay chuckled. “Well, all I have ever seen was my father’s hall which was cold and unwelcoming to all. I’d take this anyday. You have all your friends here and of course me, your lands, your Keep and Towers. And everyone one of us here would kill or die for you. I prefer battles myself...but if peace is what you want, then we shall see that you have it at any cost, puppy”

“In the strange religion here, there’s the Drowned God but there’s also a Storm God we don’t pray to. He isn’t our God, he’s the enemy, a monster. He is destruction but also protection, he made the Ironborn change, grow hard and strong. I used to think, when I was like,” he glanced at Severin, “him, but… quieter,” he laughed. “I used to think, why wouldn’t they get along? It’s silly.”

Reek rubbed the back of his messy hair and smiled shyly. “But, the Drowned God is wrecked and ruined and his strength lies in coming back from nothing and making a home at the black bottom of the sea where he dines with heros. They’re connected forces… destruction and strength. I thought, _clearly_ , the Storm God should be the Salt King and the Drowned God the Rock king. Then the Islands would be reborn into a new era. See?” Reek laughed and shook his head how could anybody see? “Let’s walk and clear our heads.”

Ramsay dragged Reek outside and breathed deeply of the salt air he has grown used to. “That is like us...I am the dark battle crazy one..you are the conscience, you will be what keeps me from bloody rage filled insanity...and I keep you from your own drowning.” He got his puppy out of sight behind a large boulder made smooth by years of saltwater. Pressing Reek against it, Ramsay sniffed his curls then kissed him, his lips making a path towards the scar that Ramsay wants to bite.

Reek allowed his head to roll back. He shuddered as he exhaled and lay passively, just barely clawing at Ramsay’s belt.

“I will try and be what you need and want, Reek. No matter what that turns out to be as you get better. I’m still going to tell you what to do. I’m going to punish and hurt you if I need to. Those things aren’t going to change about me, puppy. And you will love me anyway, forever, no matter what.” Ramsay growled as he bit into Reek’s slender lovely neck.

Reek cried out and wrapped his remaining fingers around the back of his Master's head. “ _Yes, always._ ” He rubbed his cheek  into Ramsay’s thick hair and kissed his mouth as soon as it came rolling up. Reek’s pressed into the rock so he could wrap his legs around Ramsay’s waist.

With a small snarl, Ramsay pulled Reek nearly into his own body. “Mine. Yours. Forever and if anyone ever tries to come between us, I will destroy them.”

Reek nodded solemnly. _“Yes, forever.”_

 

They couldn’t see the tiny sparkle off in the distance. So far off that the ship was barely seen with its’ sails purposely hidden. They couldn’t see the spyglass that Euron Greyjoy was watching them through. They didn’t see his smile.

  
The End


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This amazing art was created by GinFourEight! Thank you so very much!

  
by [GinFourEight](http://archiveofourown.org/users/GinFourEight/profile)


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